Rose56

Hi folks, I am still struggling with depression this week. I keep beating myself up because I cant change my life. I cant ask my husband to leave and never come back. Even though I dont like the relationship most of the time. I feel like a looser. I guess I am just a passive personality. I just let things happen to me and dont take any positive action. I apologize for this post. Just a whining and poor me kind of thing. But I guess that is just me right now.

smoke gets in my eyes

Hi Rose...
Oh, you absolutely CAN ask your husband to leave and never come back. When you realize that, you will feel the power that comes with CHOICE. Every day you stay with him is by your own design, and you can change that design tomorrow, if you CHOOSE to.

Now, sign up for a belly dancing class.

Love,
Smoke

bonbon

Rose,
TRUST ME! I totally understand where you are. I hate those days/nights. They are really tuff to manage through. Try to keep your head up, and keep coming here!

God Bless,
Love,
bonbon

helluvagalnva

Hi Rose,

Yes you can ask him to leave. I did and it was the best decision I've made but that's me. I really don't know your situation but it may be the only thing that will open your eyes so you'll realize that even though it's scarey, change is good. It allows you the time and space you need for yourself. You need to stop thinking about him and his feelings so much and think about yourself. You and your happiness is worth it, isn't it? I think so.

I know it's hard. I still go through fighting the quilt everyday but I just think about today. I still let him get into my thoughts because of something he said or did and I have to fight really hard reminding myself that I have choices and I'm not going to let him ruin my day. Just think about today because tomorrow isn't here yet and there isn't anything you can do about yesterday. Think about what you can choose to do differently today to change YOUR life.

Take care of yourself and if you want to e-mail to talk (we can help each other)it's
[email protected]

Lots of hugs,
Galnva

You'll do what's best for you when you're ready.

Rose56

Thanks guys, I know you are right. I make the choice to stay. I want to get off the fence, maybe I will just fall off on one side or the other. What can I do today? I can share on the message board (check), pray to my HP (check), email friends that care (check), exercise (planned), relax and read my book (planned), and hope for more clarity tomorrow. thanks

JT

Rose,

And schedule yourself to learn more about the disease of alcoholism...it can be an eye opener.... And lift the weight.

Paula

GIPSEE2002

Rose56
Hang in there. I am suffering from depression this week too. You have a lot friends here. Just know that there are people who going through the same things and support you.
Take care of yourself first. I know it sounds like the same message over and over but its true. You have to fill your well before others can take out.
Gipsee

Rose56

Thanks Gipsee. Today I am feeling better. Last week I had to deal with my disappointment and with beating myself up about my situation. I know that beating myself into making a decision doesn't work and helps to bring in the depression. I am trying to take care of myself, but that is easier said than done in most cases. SOmetimes it is hard to know what to do to take care of yourself.