Strange, beautiful, and just what I needed
Strange, beautiful, and just what I needed
Had therapy yesterday. It was ok. AH still didn't have the ok from the insurance company to leave for treatment, so I've just been dealing with the whole "how many people are you going to sleep with while I'm gone thing".
I decided after therapy that I deserved a coffee. An expensive coffee. I don't have a lot of money, but I had some and well...I just did it.
The lady brought my coffee out to me from around the counter and came up to me.
Her: God told me I really needed to tell you something.
Me: blank stare
Her: Your having a lot of family problems aren't you?
Me: (almost burst into tears but held it together) Yes, yes I am.
Her: God wants you to know that He is with you and He is going to restore and redeem your family. He just wants you to trust Him.
She gave me a big hug. I thanked her and told her I needed to here that. I really did. I'm crying just thinking about it. I mean I wasn't crying when I went in there, no hint of despair, just an average customer. I needed that.
Couple hours later I got the call from insurance. They will have him approved by Monday, so Monday I will drive him to treatment and then come home.
He was so drunk last night. He freaked when he found out he was approved. Now he can't really back out. I mean he CAN, but it would be very difficult for him. He was so mean last night. I slept with the kids.
Today he is very apologetic (of course he remembers virtually nothing....wish I had that problem when he gets belligerent)
I decided after therapy that I deserved a coffee. An expensive coffee. I don't have a lot of money, but I had some and well...I just did it.
The lady brought my coffee out to me from around the counter and came up to me.
Her: God told me I really needed to tell you something.
Me: blank stare
Her: Your having a lot of family problems aren't you?
Me: (almost burst into tears but held it together) Yes, yes I am.
Her: God wants you to know that He is with you and He is going to restore and redeem your family. He just wants you to trust Him.
She gave me a big hug. I thanked her and told her I needed to here that. I really did. I'm crying just thinking about it. I mean I wasn't crying when I went in there, no hint of despair, just an average customer. I needed that.
Couple hours later I got the call from insurance. They will have him approved by Monday, so Monday I will drive him to treatment and then come home.
He was so drunk last night. He freaked when he found out he was approved. Now he can't really back out. I mean he CAN, but it would be very difficult for him. He was so mean last night. I slept with the kids.
Today he is very apologetic (of course he remembers virtually nothing....wish I had that problem when he gets belligerent)
Big hugs fts. Do you and the kids have a safe place to go if he goes off the rails this weekend? Sounds like he is set on having one last hurrah before treatment.
Glad you had a well deserved moment of peace yesterday. Hugs to you and your kids. Take care.
Just a thought. If he tries to weasel out of treatment, would you be OK telling him that either way he is leaving on Monday? He can either go to treatment or just go. Your family should not have to live like this. You and your kids deserve peace.
Glad you had a well deserved moment of peace yesterday. Hugs to you and your kids. Take care.
Just a thought. If he tries to weasel out of treatment, would you be OK telling him that either way he is leaving on Monday? He can either go to treatment or just go. Your family should not have to live like this. You and your kids deserve peace.
Big hugs fts. Do you and the kids have a safe place to go if he goes off the rails this weekend? Sounds like he is set on having one last hurrah before treatment.
Glad you had a well deserved moment of peace yesterday. Hugs to you and your kids. Take care.
Just a thought. If he tries to weasel out of treatment, would you be OK telling him that either way he is leaving on Monday? He can either go to treatment or just go. Your family should not have to live like this. You and your kids deserve peace.
Glad you had a well deserved moment of peace yesterday. Hugs to you and your kids. Take care.
Just a thought. If he tries to weasel out of treatment, would you be OK telling him that either way he is leaving on Monday? He can either go to treatment or just go. Your family should not have to live like this. You and your kids deserve peace.
I have also been thinking about the jealousy and controlling behavior. If he comes back and that has not shown any improvement, I will seek a divorce at that point. Even if he is not drinking. I HAVE to see progress. Not perfection, just progress. That's all I'm asking for.
I'm so glad you got that message of hope.
And this gives me hope for you:
Not because I hope you will divorce him -- but because you sound like you are fed up with the bad and aren't going to settle for anything but being treated the way you deserve. And that is a very, very good thing. For you and the kids.
And this gives me hope for you:
I have also been thinking about the jealousy and controlling behavior. If he comes back and that has not shown any improvement, I will seek a divorce at that point. Even if he is not drinking.
Really hope treatment goes well for him. Really do, but in the meantime...I need to focus on me
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 230
Sometimes it is amazing how we get what we need like that - even if we aren't looking or asking for. I know when it has happened to me it strengthens my faith in my HP
The 'experts' have given you great advice so I'll just send you a hug and good luck wishes. I hope your weekend ends up as non eventful as possible and that he honors his agreement to enter treatment on Monday
The 'experts' have given you great advice so I'll just send you a hug and good luck wishes. I hope your weekend ends up as non eventful as possible and that he honors his agreement to enter treatment on Monday
Last edited by walkinganewpath; 12-19-2014 at 09:30 AM. Reason: typo
Wow, those moments really make me stop & catch my breath. Sounds like your HP was DETERMINED to send a message that you would hear!
((((HUGE HUGS))))) I think you are navigating all of this so much better than you give yourself credit for. Hang in there Girl, praying that Monday comes quickly & without further incident!
((((HUGE HUGS))))) I think you are navigating all of this so much better than you give yourself credit for. Hang in there Girl, praying that Monday comes quickly & without further incident!
I decided after therapy that I deserved a coffee. An expensive coffee. I don't have a lot of money, but I had some and well...I just did it.
The lady brought my coffee out to me from around the counter and came up to me.
Her: God told me I really needed to tell you something.
Me: blank stare
Her: Your having a lot of family problems aren't you?
Me: (almost burst into tears but held it together) Yes, yes I am.
Her: God wants you to know that He is with you and He is going to restore and redeem your family. He just wants you to trust Him.
She gave me a big hug. I thanked her and told her I needed to here that. I really did. I'm crying just thinking about it. I mean I wasn't crying when I went in there, no hint of despair, just an average customer. I needed that.
The lady brought my coffee out to me from around the counter and came up to me.
Her: God told me I really needed to tell you something.
Me: blank stare
Her: Your having a lot of family problems aren't you?
Me: (almost burst into tears but held it together) Yes, yes I am.
Her: God wants you to know that He is with you and He is going to restore and redeem your family. He just wants you to trust Him.
She gave me a big hug. I thanked her and told her I needed to here that. I really did. I'm crying just thinking about it. I mean I wasn't crying when I went in there, no hint of despair, just an average customer. I needed that.
I hope you and your kids stay safe this weekend, and that you AH goes to rehab without incident.
free,
I think you have been receiving so many "messages" recently. The money from you Grandfather, the opening at treatment for your AH. The love that you are also receiving from this community.
I read this somewhere and I'm not exactly sure how the whole story goes. It's about someone who asks God for help. They are walking with God on the sand. Most of the time there are two sets of footprints. Then the person looks back onto the sand and for a short period of time, there is only one set of footprints. So they say to God, I trusted you, you said you would walk this path with me, why were there only one set of footprints there. God replied because that's when I was carrying you.
I know I really messed up that story, but that's the way I remember, it might be called footprints in the sand, or something like that.
You've been giving yourself to the HP. There may be times when you feel you may not be able to make it, just know God will be there to carry then.
((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))
again, you are amazing
amy
I think you have been receiving so many "messages" recently. The money from you Grandfather, the opening at treatment for your AH. The love that you are also receiving from this community.
I read this somewhere and I'm not exactly sure how the whole story goes. It's about someone who asks God for help. They are walking with God on the sand. Most of the time there are two sets of footprints. Then the person looks back onto the sand and for a short period of time, there is only one set of footprints. So they say to God, I trusted you, you said you would walk this path with me, why were there only one set of footprints there. God replied because that's when I was carrying you.
I know I really messed up that story, but that's the way I remember, it might be called footprints in the sand, or something like that.
You've been giving yourself to the HP. There may be times when you feel you may not be able to make it, just know God will be there to carry then.
((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))
again, you are amazing
amy
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