bjmt

Last weekend my AH and I travelled to Devon for a Great Nephews and Neices christening. Its about a five hour drive from where we live. One good thing is my AH doesn't drink and drive. He has one arrest for drink driving..years ago. We stopped off at Stonehenge for two hours and enjoyed the weather and sightseeing. When we arrived at my sister-in-laws...she had tea fixed for us. Then the drinking began. Sister-in-law brought down some really old photos of AH's family from years past. In one photo there were the four kids,with their Mum. Sister-in-law made the statement that Dad was drunk and passed out..couldn't wake him up for photo. When he finally did wake he drove his family home. My AH..then said..and yes...Dads sober insticts drove us home!! "What the blank"..I said..at this point. Sister-in-law then commented, that Dad was drunk several times a week for years. My AH..then stated that his Grandfather was the same way. Upon which sister-in-law said.... Great-Grandfather was the same. This has gone from generation to generation..no one seems to want to change this pattern. Out of four kids...three of them drink heavily. Plus out of 6 Grandkids...5 drink heavily. Strange,that no one in this bunch think they have a problem. Are they all in denial..or just plain uneducated? I feel like pulling my hair out,when I hear..."LET GO TO THE PUB". Maybe an English thing..but it gets really old!! I had to rant a bit..sorry!

JT

bjmt,

It IS a generational thing...not genetic, I don't believe, but certainly behavioral. Now about those men?? I'll bet if you take a look at Mum, Grandmum and great-grandmum you may find some interesting characteristics that they share as well. Like thinning hair?? LOL!

Hugs,
JT

bjmt

Interesting,you should mention the women in this family. They all died three to five years before the men in the family. Think they suffered? "By pulling their hair out?"

sweeks

Hi! I'm pretty new here. I went to my first "meeting" last week. It wasn't al-anon but a family meeting at my mom's treatment facility. We watched a movie called "the hijacked brain" produced by pbs I think. It was all about how addiction affects the brain mostly...but there was also a segment about heredity. Some guy did a bunch of tests on children of alcoholic and others who weren't and It turned up that people that were the child of an alcoholic were 4 TIMES MORE LIKLEY to become an alcoholic. BUT the really interesting part was that children of alcoholic's that were adopted away into a non-alcoholic family were still 4 times more likley to become an alcoholic than the general public.....

Interesting huh? Worries the crap out of me though... :scared1: I suppose I at least have the benefit of learning about all of this while I'm still young.

bjmt

sweeks,have to watch out for.."The hijacked brain" produced by pbs. Sounds interesting.
JT,I was always told that It can be a genetic thing...as much as generational. Not to be disagreeable..but this was my teaching when I worked in a hospital twenty years ago in the States. Genetics could play a big part in this disease. One reason to be careful of the generation to generation thing.

sweeks

Found a website that seems to be related if anyone is interested.

http://www.thirteen.org/closetohome/html/show2.html

Sad_Hazeleyes

I am the third possible forth generation of alcoholics, but made the choice not to become addicted to alcohol, but became a love addicted instead. I chose to be addicted to heartache, instead of alcohol, go figure.

sweeks

Hard to say which is better huh? *wry*

I think I'm fourth generation from my mom's side...skipped my grandparents though as far as I know by my great grama was an alcoholic.

Teggie

Very interesting! Got me to climbing the ole family tree. hehe. Lets see father, sister, brother, maternal grandfather, paternal grandfather, all alcoholics that I know of. Yikes, guess I was the lucky one out of the batch. Or am I? lol.
((((Bjmt))) hugs to you gf! Looks like your with an A too no?? I am with one also. Funny how all that works out. Never thought I would marry one, but I did. My dad is a raging A, always has been, I don't see that changing anytime soon. I can relate with your words on childhood, I remember alot of similar things, only my mom divorced my dad when I was 4 and married another A later on who was both mentally and physically abusive. I've come to a point in my recovery that I am dealing more with all that that I've kept buried for so long. And it's hard to say the least. Alanon has been a lifesaver to me. Keep up with your meetings, continue to share here, you'll be amazed how much better you'll feel. Hugs! Teggie

Karivan

I really think there is something in the hereditary idea. My mother gets addicted to pills really easy, God forbid if she took a drink though! My sister, cousin, uncle, and brother-in-law (not blood but oh well) all died from alcohol realted diseases. My other sister and brother are alcoholics. My father was a heavy drinker; a functioning alcoholic I guess. My husband is also a functioning alcoholic. I've been in recovery for 7 years, fallen off the wagon a few times. I didn't know the grandparents well enough to know if it was in their lives. My oldest son struggles with it but my younger son takes it seriously and doesn't touch it.

It also could be that addicts are attracted to other addicts and it's conditioned when we are young.