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I bought perfume for myself!

Old 12-08-2014, 07:26 PM
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I bought perfume for myself!

Ok, this may seem like a silly title to a thread....

But, I want you all to know that I haven't bought perfume since 1998. When I was pregnant I had serious smell aversions and one of which was to perfumes and colognes to the point where I thought I would vomit in the department stores, LOL.

Well, I've grown up and my body has changed and I've been wanting to buy perfume for myself but I didn't know the first thing about what was out there. I finally settled on Coach Poppy and I'm quite pleased with myself because this was something I really needed to do for myself.

What did you do for yourself today or recently?

As an aside, I really needed to do something for me because I was starting to slip into a depression over the holidays and my lack of holiday plans, etc, and missing my family, etc.

I also have been feeling guilty about my plans to divorce my AH because he's really been trying and he's been struggling to find his place in the family. I feel sorry for him and it's hard to figure out whether this is pity or compassion or maybe both. Also, it was his birthday yesterday and I tried to make it nice for him and take him out and we bought him a present, etc but I could tell that he felt weird and I felt weird, sigh....

This is so hard, but I know it's the right thing. So, for me, I got perfume, LOL! Now, I have to go read and journal and text an Al Anon friend.
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Old 12-08-2014, 07:36 PM
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Do you have a sponsor in al-anon?

I know that you have talked about two things within recent memory: shopaholic stuff and money issues and you just bought a new car. People who have shopaholic tendencies tend to buy things in order to distract themselves from their feelings. I'm speaking from my own personal experiences. Last Christmas, I treated myself to two Louis Vuitton bags and a pair of Chanel sunglasses. They gave me a momentary "I deserve this stuff" high but all of my problems brought me back down because I still didn't deal with them.

I hope this doesn't come off as insensitive, I'm attempting to bring in a different perspective.

Today I took myself to my doctor for a long overdue checkup. Next week it's the dentist. This is what I've learned that self care it is about: less about money, more about self.
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Old 12-08-2014, 07:43 PM
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Yay! I love perfume, and I only wear one scent at all times. I can remember the ones I had for different phases in my life. My all-time favorite (Lanvin's My Sin) has been discontinued, I wore Samsara for quite a while, and now I wear J'Adore.
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Old 12-08-2014, 07:58 PM
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Originally Posted by Stung View Post
Do you have a sponsor in al-anon?

I know that you have talked about two things within recent memory: shopaholic stuff and money issues and you just bought a new car. People who have shopaholic tendencies tend to buy things in order to distract themselves from their feelings. I'm speaking from my own personal experiences. Last Christmas, I treated myself to two Louis Vuitton bags and a pair of Chanel sunglasses. They gave me a momentary "I deserve this stuff" high but all of my problems brought me back down because I still didn't deal with them.

I hope this doesn't come off as insensitive, I'm attempting to bring in a different perspective.

Today I took myself to my doctor for a long overdue checkup. Next week it's the dentist. This is what I've learned that self care it is about: less about money, more about self.
Yeah, I do, and yes that was a problem for me. If it sounds better, I got the roller ball scent which costs about 1/3 the price of the actual perfume.

Yeah, with the car purchase, things are changing because of the payment. I'm canceling our country club membership this month which means no more trainer and gym. I have lots of DVDs that are collecting dust and I used to be a yoga instructor so it's time for me to step it up and take care of my exercise on my own, LOL!

I'm putting my son into a program for training for high school athletes which will be 1/4th the cost of the country club membership where I felt we were wasting money anyway.

I'm also canceling the pool service and I'm getting rid of MY nextflix account (ah has his own) and my audible account and possibly downgrading cable to basic.

Since I tend to obsess, I can also go the other way. Re-using plastic bags(as long as it was used for dry ingredients/products), turning off lights when we leave a room, using coupons and shopping sales, etc. I've done all of this before but it was years ago when I quit my job and we had to learn to live off one income. I've done it before, I can do it again.

The only splurge I'll continue to make is on my IT cosmetics CC cream. Other than that, Suave and Pantene and Cover Girl will do! As will Walmart sour cream and milk, LOL!

Funny that you mentioned the doctor. I'm going to the dentist next week to make sure all is well and I have an MRI scheduled for Friday to check my spine because of the pain I've been having for 6 months now. Doc is concerned because it's not better after alternative therapies. Oh, and I had my physical back in September because I knew I needed to do that, too, after 10 years of neglect, ugh.

I get what you are saying and I'm so glad you brought it up. Definitely something I have to watch and be accountable for. I'm actually hoping that having AH involved in the 'watching of the accounts' helps me tidy up my spending. It's time for me to make changes because I'll be on a fixed income until I get on my feet again in the future!
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Old 12-08-2014, 08:00 PM
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Originally Posted by LexieCat View Post
Yay! I love perfume, and I only wear one scent at all times. I can remember the ones I had for different phases in my life. My all-time favorite (Lanvin's My Sin) has been discontinued, I wore Samsara for quite a while, and now I wear J'Adore.
While I was out shopping, I saw Coco by Chanel and I remember wearing that in college! Never smelled J'Adore but I've seen their commercials! It's funny how we all find a scent we like and stay with it for a phase and then all of a sudden switch to something else.
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Old 12-08-2014, 08:09 PM
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I know that in my case, switching from Samsara to J'Adore was a conscious decision. I'd picked out Samsara with the "approval" of my last XSO(B), and after I got sober it was part of reinventing my look a bit. They are actually all similar in some ways, but I really like J'Adore.
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Old 12-08-2014, 08:17 PM
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Originally Posted by lizatola View Post
While I was out shopping, I saw Coco by Chanel and I remember wearing that in college! Never smelled J'Adore but I've seen their commercials! It's funny how we all find a scent we like and stay with it for a phase and then all of a sudden switch to something else.

Yay on the perfume purchase. I think it is a small daily indulgence which is affordable and doable for most people.
I do home DVD/ DIY workouts. It's great. Always something different. Plus there is tons of stuff available online for free or really cheap. I am a solitary exerciser. The military forever cured me of any desire to work out with even one other person present. I detest the idea of working out amongst a big, sweaty herd or even one other person talking at me.
A few months ago I shopped around and treated myself to an expensive new perfume. The first one in a really long time. Replica Beach Walk by Maison Martin Margiela. It has lasted forever and every time I spritz it on I feel confident and beautiful.
A long time ago I used to wear Chanel Coco Mademoiselle, then I quit caring about how I looked or smelled for a few years. First I was in Iraq, then just a war zone in my own home. I didn't care about myself enough to worry what scent of Dollar Tree bar soap I bought to wash with.
Sometimes a little splurge goes a long way. I am still spritzing on my perfume and loving it.
Good for you.
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Old 12-09-2014, 03:18 AM
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Yay on the splurge! My favorites are Hermes Eau de Merveiles and Chanel #5. Last year a client gave me an ounce of #5 real perfume. Its so nice to have a couple indulgences.

As for myself I took the day off last Saturday and decorated the house. I work all the time so that was pretty indulgent for me. I am planning a massage before Christmas.
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Old 12-09-2014, 03:42 AM
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My mom, even tho she dealt with her
own demons, was also able to work in
the high end cosmetic counters and
fragrance counters for both men and
women, so I grew up surrounded with
it.

I am still amazed at how she functioned
and continued to look so elegant and
attractive behind the counters for so long.

Anyway, I do have many frangrances
from the past that I was brought up
on and still enjoy, but today I look for
nice smelling body powder sprays. They
are easy to use from head to toe for a
quick pick me up fresh smell.

Today, I look forward to searching for
the next perfect tattoo to add to my
collection already that I began getting
about 5 yrs ago and now im looking
forward to getting it on Dec. 19, right
between my belly button birthday on
the 15th and Christmas.

56 is coming with 24yrs sobriety and I
smell nice and pretty with lovely fragrances
each day.

Sobriety looks and smells Wonderful..!!!!
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Old 12-09-2014, 04:23 AM
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Lovely to treat yourself, you deserve it.
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Old 12-09-2014, 06:22 AM
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My thing this year has been quality French scented soap.
You can get that marked down to about $6.00 per bar at Amazon (usually about $8.00)
and I get free shipping. Also, some kinds are on their "Subscribe and Save" option
for monthly delivery at 15% off with five or more other items.

Here is a link to my current favorite (White Gardenia) I just got that way:

Amazon.com : Pre de Provence Soap Shea Enriched Everyday 250 Gram Extra Large French Soap Bar - White Gardenia : Bath Soaps : Beauty

I started out wanting soap without petro-chemical products which most U.S. soaps have,but honestly what hooked me was the great scents,
the wonderful lather, and the fact that they are non-drying and last literally for months since they are triple-milled and very hard and large in size.
Many of them have flower petals etc. for exfoliating--Lavender is great for that as is Rose.

Lately, I've been shaving some into my washing machine and doing laundry with them.
Works great and has a very light scent when done (Linden flower is terrific for this)

I really suggest trying these if you haven't
Cost wise they are actually a great value compared to U.S. soap which doesn't last long and is in very small bars compared to these.
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Old 12-09-2014, 06:23 AM
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Originally Posted by Hawkeye13 View Post
My thing this year has been quality French scented soap.
You can get that marked down to about $6.00 per bar at Amazon (usually about $8.00)
and I get free shipping. Also, some kinds are on their "Subscribe and Save" option
for monthly delivery at 15% off with five or more other items.

Here is a link to my current favorite (White Gardenia) I just got that way:

Amazon.com : Pre de Provence Soap Shea Enriched Everyday 250 Gram Extra Large French Soap Bar - White Gardenia : Bath Soaps : Beauty

I started out wanting soap without petro-chemical products which most U.S. soaps have,but honestly what hooked me was the great scents,
the wonderful lather, and the fact that they are non-drying and last literally for months since they are triple-milled and very hard and large in size.
Many of them have flower petals etc. for exfoliating--Lavender is great for that as is Rose.

Lately, I've been shaving some into my washing machine and doing laundry with them.
Works great and has a very light scent when done (Linden flower is terrific for this)

I really suggest trying these if you haven't
Cost wise they are actually a great value compared to U.S. soap which doesn't last long and is in very small bars compared to these.
I used to use that soap!
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Old 12-09-2014, 06:31 AM
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Good for YOU Liz!

I attended a self-hypnosis seminar on Sunday because it's another tool I want to add to my toolbox for Total Life Recovery. I used this method to successfully quit smoking & will be 9 yrs cigarette free come January. It's fascinating to me how strong & yet malleable the mind really is & how much of our reality can be changed from the inside out. It was just a basic introduction to hypnosis but it was a wonderful jumping off point for me to pursue this further.
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Old 12-09-2014, 07:03 AM
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Originally Posted by FireSprite View Post
Good for YOU Liz!

I attended a self-hypnosis seminar on Sunday because it's another tool I want to add to my toolbox for Total Life Recovery. I used this method to successfully quit smoking & will be 9 yrs cigarette free come January. It's fascinating to me how strong & yet malleable the mind really is & how much of our reality can be changed from the inside out. It was just a basic introduction to hypnosis but it was a wonderful jumping off point for me to pursue this further.
My aunt trains people in hypnosis and I have wanted to get to GA to visit her so she could work with me. She's completely changed her life through hypnosis and EFT techniques.

I quit smoking a long time ago but it was a huge accomplishment. Good for you!
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Old 12-09-2014, 09:44 AM
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Great that you are taking care of yourself, Liza. These things can feel very rewarding after years of neglecting ourselves, I know it very well. I love to go to spas for a dose of self-indulgence.

I love nice scents and perfumes. Actually, I just wanted to change the perfume I've been wearing for many years now and went to the store to buy something new during the Thanksgiving break... but ended up leaving with yet another bottle of the old thing. It's DKNY's Be Delicious for me, not sure why I'm so attached to it. I also used J'Adore in the past.

The hypnosis thing is interesting, that's something I've never tried but have always been curious. This post now just reminded me, I think I'm going to try some online thing to start with! I love guided meditations with the right guide who works for me, my favorite meditation teacher can often take me to amazing "places" mentally with this, maybe it's similar in some way.
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Old 12-09-2014, 09:51 AM
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Thank you for the reminder.

What have I done for myself today? I had coffee. (Oh wait -- that might be more for the benefit of the people around me...)

I've gotten myself a mentor. One of my kids was just diagnosed with an eating disorder, and I found a mentor (much like a sponsor in Al-Anon) who is there for me to ask question of, vent to, but also to make sure I take care of myself. That's huge for me, because I hate asking for help and I went into it kicking and screaming -- but I know I need it.
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Old 12-09-2014, 10:26 AM
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I went Xmas shopping last night and got myself perfume too! It is just from American Eagle but it smells SOOO good! My DD wanted some boots. I had a coupon for $20 off of $50, and it was Buy One Get One Half of anything in the store. They let me combine them, so I got boots and perfume for $40. Score! And...it smells SOOO good!!
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Old 12-09-2014, 11:00 AM
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Well, we all smell really really good now so let's get together for some caroling:

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Old 12-09-2014, 11:05 AM
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Good for you! I got a massage and it was wonderful! We all need to take care of ourselves even if it is something small- do something special for yourself! We are all worth it!
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