Does Al-Alanon Read the AA Big Book
Engineer Things; LOVE People
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,707
Having been through the zoo, and seen the elephant . . . and the poop . . .
CAL sort of looks like Cash Register Approved Literature. You all know I am a Big Alanon Fan . . . but they use the sales of the books to fund the top end. Wish they would pick a better way, and perhaps some day they/we will . . . but that is what I am pretty sure I saw at the zoo.
But as far as the Big Book and reading it methodically at meetings - - those are usually called "Big Book Studies" and they happen from Time-to-time on Both Sides. Not that big of deal, and are the meetings are usually listed as such.
CAL sort of looks like Cash Register Approved Literature. You all know I am a Big Alanon Fan . . . but they use the sales of the books to fund the top end. Wish they would pick a better way, and perhaps some day they/we will . . . but that is what I am pretty sure I saw at the zoo.
But as far as the Big Book and reading it methodically at meetings - - those are usually called "Big Book Studies" and they happen from Time-to-time on Both Sides. Not that big of deal, and are the meetings are usually listed as such.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 1,243
Originally Posted by Hammer 
Having been through the zoo, and seen the elephant . . . and the poop . . .
CAL sort of looks like Cash Register Approved Literature. You all know I am a Big Alanon Fan . . . but they use the sales of the books to fund the top end. Wish they would pick a better way, and perhaps some day they/we will . . . but that is what I am pretty sure I saw at the zoo.
But as far as the Big Book and reading it methodically at meetings - - those are usually called "Big Book Studies" and they happen from Time-to-time on Both Sides. Not that big of deal, and are the meetings are usually listed as such.
CAL sort of looks like Cash Register Approved Literature. You all know I am a Big Alanon Fan . . . but they use the sales of the books to fund the top end. Wish they would pick a better way, and perhaps some day they/we will . . . but that is what I am pretty sure I saw at the zoo.
But as far as the Big Book and reading it methodically at meetings - - those are usually called "Big Book Studies" and they happen from Time-to-time on Both Sides. Not that big of deal, and are the meetings are usually listed as such.
I used to attend some great BB Studies that were attended by both Alanon and AA and there were great discussions. Very spiritual group that had a lot of maturity and sobriety and was the beginning of my foundations of eventual recovery.
Rogue Alanoner...reading the BB... that's me.
Engineer Things; LOVE People
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,707
Originally Posted by Hopeworks
The A is addicted to alcohol. The alanon is addicted to the A.
Most folks I see there are in Alanon are in no way addicted to the nonsense, but rather looking how to survive and/or escape it.
I think I could correctly say that I was/have been lied to (and now about) by an untrustworthy and very selfish Mentally Ill person.
I suppose it could be the case that I was foolish to have trusted an untrustworthy and very selfish Mentally Ill person -- but they do not exactly arrive with Consumer Warning labels on them, do they?
I don't have to collect alcoholics in my own life anymore because I practice a life of recovery now.
They say "A" and I go the other way.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Silicon Valley, CA
Posts: 2,066
Oh man. The Big Book. I have to attend the business meetings for my home group now, since I volunteered to be the treasurer and they have talked (read: bitched) about this topic each time I've attended the business meetings. People in my home group talk about double winners (to be PC they are really Alanon Members Who Are Also Members of AA) with malice and want nothing to do with any books that aren't specifically CAL approved. Alanaon is for FRIENDS and FAMILY members of alcoholics…some people on my side fail to recognize that addicts generally are very well qualified to be in alanon considering that the criteria is simply having friends or family members whose alcoholism has effected them. My husband has a crap ton more alcoholic qualifiers than I do! I digress.
One of my favorite alanon people is a double winner and she was the speaker at my home group a few months ago and she read out of the Big Book for her speech. Oh my goodness, the stink some people made about it, you might have thought she was reading out of some cult handbook.
My thoughts are that if she read something that was profound (and we're talking about a woman with nearly 30 years of sobriety and a long ass time in alanon, she knows her stuff!) and it's helped her recovery enough to share it as a speaker then I want to know what it was! And even if it wasn't helpful for me, that doesn't mean that it isn't helpful for someone else. What really gets under my skin are the alanon rules police or alanon hall monitors. I feel like a lot of people want to focus on only certain traditions or guidelines rather than viewing them as a whole. And especially pointing out when someone else has broken those rules. Keep the focus on yourself!
One of my favorite alanon people is a double winner and she was the speaker at my home group a few months ago and she read out of the Big Book for her speech. Oh my goodness, the stink some people made about it, you might have thought she was reading out of some cult handbook.
My thoughts are that if she read something that was profound (and we're talking about a woman with nearly 30 years of sobriety and a long ass time in alanon, she knows her stuff!) and it's helped her recovery enough to share it as a speaker then I want to know what it was! And even if it wasn't helpful for me, that doesn't mean that it isn't helpful for someone else. What really gets under my skin are the alanon rules police or alanon hall monitors. I feel like a lot of people want to focus on only certain traditions or guidelines rather than viewing them as a whole. And especially pointing out when someone else has broken those rules. Keep the focus on yourself!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 765
I belong to many fellowships and we're not supposed to read anything in any fellowship that isn't conference-approved for that fellowship. It breaks traditions. I no longer even bring anything into a meeting that isn't conference-approved for that fellowship. I observe and respect the traditions.
AA's Big Book however, is the main 12 steps. All other fellowships are an offshoot of that book. In my area we now have 2 large groups of Alanons who get together for weekly meetings and not only do we read that book, everyone is doing the program of recovery in it. They are doing what many AAs haven't even done yet. We do not announce these meetings in Alanon because we use AA literature. Word of mouth brings folks. We just celebrated our anniversary in one of those meetings and there were about 250 people in attendance with 3 speakers (1 AA Big Book Steps speaker and 2 Alanon-qualified Big Book Steps speakers.
It is all the same disease - but Alanons can have different symptoms sometimes.
In order to see that, one must do the work - and develop a set of eyes that can see the book from the codependent view.
People from all fellowships are now using the BB to recover from any addiction by doing this work.
The textbook itself (only the first 164 pages) is the only book I have ever found that is completely and totally trustworthy - every word is not only True and accurate, but the beauty of the words as laid out in masterly detail are a joy as one goes deeper into their journey and growth with it.
The stories in the back are good too but only the basic text is Perfect.
The instructions on how to actually do the steps are in the first 103 pages, and one needs a spiritual guide or sponsor who has done the work to point out were they are.
The book was a gift from God to people in all fellowships and was written by Bill when he was having a spiritual awakening and was close to God (who really wrote the book using Bill's pen and hand.)
In our groups, only those who have completed steps 1-8 and made at least 1 formal 9th step amends may share. This keeps the meetings not only solution-based, but in Truth rather than opinions.
I highly recommend the process of recovery via the Big Book for anyone who is willing to do it. It saved my life while I was dying of codependency.
In a suffering world, God is now bringing people back to the beauty and simplicity of the Main 12 Steps.
AA's Big Book however, is the main 12 steps. All other fellowships are an offshoot of that book. In my area we now have 2 large groups of Alanons who get together for weekly meetings and not only do we read that book, everyone is doing the program of recovery in it. They are doing what many AAs haven't even done yet. We do not announce these meetings in Alanon because we use AA literature. Word of mouth brings folks. We just celebrated our anniversary in one of those meetings and there were about 250 people in attendance with 3 speakers (1 AA Big Book Steps speaker and 2 Alanon-qualified Big Book Steps speakers.
It is all the same disease - but Alanons can have different symptoms sometimes.
In order to see that, one must do the work - and develop a set of eyes that can see the book from the codependent view.
People from all fellowships are now using the BB to recover from any addiction by doing this work.
The textbook itself (only the first 164 pages) is the only book I have ever found that is completely and totally trustworthy - every word is not only True and accurate, but the beauty of the words as laid out in masterly detail are a joy as one goes deeper into their journey and growth with it.
The stories in the back are good too but only the basic text is Perfect.
The instructions on how to actually do the steps are in the first 103 pages, and one needs a spiritual guide or sponsor who has done the work to point out were they are.
The book was a gift from God to people in all fellowships and was written by Bill when he was having a spiritual awakening and was close to God (who really wrote the book using Bill's pen and hand.)
In our groups, only those who have completed steps 1-8 and made at least 1 formal 9th step amends may share. This keeps the meetings not only solution-based, but in Truth rather than opinions.
I highly recommend the process of recovery via the Big Book for anyone who is willing to do it. It saved my life while I was dying of codependency.
In a suffering world, God is now bringing people back to the beauty and simplicity of the Main 12 Steps.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Iowa
Posts: 3,050
We once had a newcomer show up with an AA big book. She thought that's what Alanon did, studied the big book and worked on strategies to get the alcoholic sober. We gently set her straight, but she was obviously disappointed and hasn't returned.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2023
Posts: 1
I agree with Hammer. Also, our literature tells us to read the AA Big Book. So if we do that, why then might we not refer to how it helped us when sharing in a meeting? — Personally, and I’ve been in Alanon a long time, I see Alanon’s “approach” to this as a little indicative of the Alanon dis-ease of making myself “separate” from the alcoholic. Truth is that the AA Program is the same program we use. The Program is the steps and traditions. No more. No less. And IT is what works. I believe one Alanon to another is what works too, therefore, “our” stories of experience, strength and hope are very useful for the newcomer and seasoned Alanon. But at the end of the day, the core issue for the Alcoholic and for the Alanon is the same, as is the solution. WE dilute our program when we believe otherwise because then we try all kinds of other solutions, we try to figure out and also change under our own power, which the first step tells us is no power. We actually end up “focusing” on all kinds of other things, which, while may prove helpful for some, is not the Alanon Program Of Recovery. We as Alanons do through controlling and our wrong perceptions and attitudes the same thing that alcoholics do with alcohol and their wrong perceptions and attitudes: we try a solution to our restless, irritable, and discontent that does not work. Neither disease has one thing to do with alcohol, it’s a spiritual malady for which the solution is reliance on a Higher Power greater than ourselves. I found I could no longer conquer my “addiction” to “controlling and figuring and fixing and always saying “ than the drinker could conquer their addiction to alcohol. On his death bed Dr Bob’s parting words to Bill W. were “Keep It Simple”. He knew Bill and his inclinations and the most important thing he could leave him with as one moving forward with the program was just to keep it simple. Would serve Alanon to do the same. It is belief that we are “separate” from the drinking alcoholic that blinds us to our own selves.
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