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Old 10-27-2014, 11:24 AM
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Grammar issues

Someone explain to me whether I am just a totally, utterly judgmental b*itch OR whether I am not alone in this....

It makes me crazy-- like to the point that I refused to date people in the past (pre marriage to xAH), when an adult can not use your/you're or too/to or there/their/they're properly...

Maybe there is a 12 step group for this, I don't know... It seriously makes me crazy. And I am wondering why that is...

As an aside, I am a middle school english teacher so on some level it SHOULD make me a little crazy, right?

A little background... DD9 is good friends with a classmate and the classmate lives primarily with her dad... So my girls and his and he and I do a fair amount of things together and have for the last year or so. It's purely platonic with he and I by the way. But when he texts me about plans with the girls it is driving me INSANE that he can't use proper grammar. And then as soon as I recognize that it is bugging me, I feel like a grossly judgmental b*itch!

Am I just a grammar nazi and that's how it will always be (I have been this way my entire life) or is this something more about being raised to care more about outward, external appearance stuff than who a person is?

Ugh...

Just random musings today I guess...
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:31 AM
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My iPhone drives me crazy. It corrects things to "wrong" all the time, and I don't always proofread that closely on texts.

Some stuff is definitely First World Problems.
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:32 AM
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Oh, I wanted to add...there are a couple SR members who used to PM me if my sentence structure was off.

They don't anymore.





I put them on "ignore."
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:36 AM
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Originally Posted by biminiblue View Post
Oh, I wanted to add...there are a couple SR members who used to PM me if my sentence structure was off.

They don't anymore.


I put them on "ignore."

I don't notice it or care unless it's someone I know and truthfully, the dad has shown interest in me and I feel like my motives for wanting things to be totally platonic (beyond the fact that he's my daughters friends dad and I dont want to F that up for her) is bc the grammar makes me crazy!
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:39 AM
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I can almost guarantee he's got so bigger problems than spellcheck. Like we all do.
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:41 AM
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Actually he has said to me that he is aware I am an English teacher and that I must cringe reading his texts and that he just doesn't care that much about grammar... It's not iPhone corrections... And to be fair, if I were to do his job I would be a bumbling fool at it so to each his own...

I realize it's a 1st world problem to care about this... And I guess it does make me kind of b*itchy to care about it...
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:49 AM
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Don't be too hard on yourself. You are an English teacher! I judge people when they use poor grammar, but usually just kind of laugh at it. Some things drive me insane too. Like adding an apostrophe where it doesn't belong: "The boy's went swimming." REALLY??? REALLY? This is basic stuff. Texting has destroyed the English language and it's only going downhill from here. However, some people just do not have an affinity for language, spelling, and grammar but they excel at other things like mathematics.

Okay, maybe I care more than I let on. I'm glad I'm not the only one. Apparently I'm a judgmental bitch too. A friend of mine recently gave me this book for my birthday. You are not alone.

I Judge You When You Use Poor Grammar: A Collection of Egregious Errors, Disconcerting Bloopers, and Other Linguistic Slip-Ups: Sharon Eliza Nichols: 9780312533014: Amazon.com: Books
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:54 AM
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Oh, I get it

The English language is being destroyed.....
Imagine some of these folks reading David Copperfield.....
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:55 AM
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Your ain't crazy, he ain't gonna be no good too you if he don't know how to write proper.

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Old 10-27-2014, 11:56 AM
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As the daughter of a college English professor, it drives me crazy too, but then, I know a couple math majors who get distressed at my poor math skills. Different strokes for different folks, I guess...
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:56 AM
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Oh, me too!! UGH, I am the grammar police, but I try to not focus on it too much when I am on message boards or texting or social media. It drives me up a tree!! My own sister used 'here' instead of 'hear' one day and I nearly sent her a nasty text to explain to her how her sentence made no sense, LOL!

And, yes, I was a communications major in college with a focus on journalism and a minor in English, LOL! So, that might explain something!

My son is a spelling nazi so we both get a good laugh at stuff from time to time. He hates it when businesses use 'catz' instead of 'cats' or 'dawgs' instead of 'dogs', for instance. He says it's confusing to elementary kids learning to read, LOL! Yes, he's a chip off the old block!
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:57 AM
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I always consider someone might have an LD that makes things like spelling and grammar devilishly hard. I don't pay any attention to it and concentrate on the content - especially in forums, texts, and other casual communication. I have kids and siblings with dyslexia and CAPD. So smart - so bad at spelling and written grammar, lol.

Everyone is different. Some people are really good at grammar and spelling, some are not. Same for geography or history or math or computer games, empathy, basketball, running, cooking, painting, blah blah blah. So many things.
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:57 AM
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- I do not know why I put "so" in my last post. I think proofreading is also a lost art.

I was a communications major. I've done proofreading professionally, too.

I think I don't really care that much on forums - sad, because it will outlast me.
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:57 AM
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I need that book readerbaby!

And yes, as an English teacher I am continually horrified by how common text speak is in kids writing. It's horrifying.
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:58 AM
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Originally Posted by Carlotta View Post
Your ain't crazy, he ain't gonna be no good too you if he don't know how to write proper.

Ok, I wanted to stop reading this when the second ain't made it's appearance, LOL! And, I think you should have used 'knows' instead of 'know' in that sentence above. Really would have sent some of us over the edge! BWAHAHAHA!
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Old 10-27-2014, 11:59 AM
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I think cell phones are doing to communication what calculators did to math.
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Old 10-27-2014, 12:03 PM
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wanttobehealthy....this might be a dramatic example...but, I understand that Jeffrey Dahmer was fairly well educated and had good language skills. He had lots of good social skills that made him appeal to others.

Perhaps you are judgemental, in general, along language lines....but, I get the distinct feeling that there is more to this than just that!

My true confession....I consider an adult eating with their mouth open to be a turn off...

dandylion

I would also add that good language skills are to enable us to communicate our thoughts and feelings as well as we can...not to be used as a yardstick with which to judge other people. Their language skills are within THEIR hoola hoop. Our own are within OUR hoola hoop.

I'm just sayin'.
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Old 10-27-2014, 12:03 PM
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I taught a lesson today on the proper use of too/to/two and you're/your and there/their/they're and it pained me more than I can adequately describe to write the "wrong" sentences for the kids to fix. Literally caused my heart pain!
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Old 10-27-2014, 12:05 PM
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Originally Posted by dandylion View Post
wanttobehealthy....this might be a dramatic example...but, I understand that Jeffrey Dahmer was fairly well educated and had good language skills. He had lots of good social skills that made him appeal to others.

Perhaps you are judgemental, in general, along language lines....but, I get the distinct feeling that there is more to this than just that!

My true confession....I consider an adult eating with their mouth open to be a turn off...

dandylion
Yes, I think there is more to this too bc it seems ludicrous to me to be so judgmental toward a very nice man and good dad about grammar... But I am not entirely sure what the bigger issue is...
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Old 10-27-2014, 12:05 PM
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We all have our pet peeves - only you can determine if it's a symptom of another, larger Codie problem or just aggravating.

It bothers me sometimes, especially when I hear people using the wrong/made up words. (pacific instead of specific, etc.) But I don't think it's my job to police the world for stuff like this, surely we ALL do little things wrong in areas of our lives, it's just a matter of what/where? I'm not perfect (I'm the Queen of Run-On Sentences ) & I try really hard not to judge others for stuff like this, not knowing their personal history.

Here's a great example - one of my besties is a KDG teacher & has some of the worst spelling & grammar skills I've ever seen. It drives me absolutely bonkers if I let it get to me - how can a TEACHER not know the proper usage for there/their/they're, to/too & how to spell????

Taking a step back I've realized that school was INCREDIBLY difficult for her. As a child raised in a seriously dysfunctional & abusive home, school was not a priority & then by the time she became an adult it was hard for her to catch up. She still managed to put herself through college with almost zero support and it took her almost 12 yrs to do it, but she DID. She has always wanted to be a Kdg teacher, taught Pre-K for the entire 12 yrs she was in school & never stopped working toward her goal. She is one of the best, most patient people I've ever seen around kids. She knows every trick in the book for helping kids at that level & has already been acknowledged by her school as having the class that shows the most growth each year by the time the kids leave her care, year after year.

She turned down the chance to work with the higher performing kids in favor of those who are further behind because she knows she can make the greatest impact for them at this point in their lives. She has also opted to work at one of the poorest schools in our district, where many of the kids are so poor that the only meals they get each day are those provided at school. She is giving each of those kids the start she wishes she had had at that point in her life & then she prays that it sticks with them after they leave her - that she proves to them that they CAN learn it all no matter how far behind they are when they start that first important year. At that age she believed herself to be stupid & worthless & spent so much of her life fighting against that stigma that she has made it her life's work to reach as many kids as possible that might be growing up the same way. So I keep that in mind when I'm trying to decipher her text msgs, because I used to judge her pretty harshly for it.
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