Carlotta

My Al-Anon recovery involves becoming aware of what motivates my choices. I was appalled to discover that fear ruled my life! I seemed to be afraid of everything! I was afraid to say, “No,” to show hurt or anger, to be confused. With clenched teeth and a painted-on smile, I’d say, “Oh no, everything’s okay,” while thinking, “There’ll come a day when I’ll get even.” Even that scared me because I was afraid of my own anger! Many of my Al-Anon friends used the slogans to deal with their fears, but when fear engulfed me, all I could think of was “Came to believe . . .” I couldn’t finish the rest of the Second Step, but that one phrase was enough. So when the telephone rang and I was startled and beginning to imagine the worst, I would take a deep breath and say to myself, “Came to believe . . .” Then it became possible to pick up the phone. And I always hung up feeling so much lighter because we had handled it!