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Going Crazy I am going crazy, I am losing the plot. Today I awoke to find my car vandalised... Was it my ExAH angry that he has been charged with an AVO.. Who knows.. Then I go into meltdown trying to work it all out.. finally having respite because I am awaiting to go to court on Thursday to then have to process that he cheated on me all the time while we were together.. how could he!!!!!??!??? How could he look me in the eyes and be normal and with that many woman????? Well over 30!! I am falling to pieces... What the hell is happening???? Please help me.. Someone please help me to make sense of what my life has become.... What is this? To then discover he has been diagnosed as a psychopath... I can't take anymore ... I'm dead inside |
Sorry all this is happening… What do you mean he has been diagnosed as a psychopath? By Whom? Take a deep breath - all will be ok. |
By the family therapist in his rehab clinic.. To what degree I don't know exactly though |
Honey, it's not what has your life become, it is what has his life become. I am sorry you are going through this. It's grief, don't forget that. You are grieving what you thought you had and who you thought he was. Please don't see yourself as any less. It's him, not you. Sending you many hugs and much love today!!!! |
Hi KI, see if you can use the Family Court counsellors - you obviously need to talk to someone. Have you thought of calling Lifeline? |
Take a deep breath KI... this too shall pass although I understand how terribly hard it is for you right now. Perhaps a call to a stress center is in order to get you through the next few days to help you process it all. Your world as you know it has crumbled beneath you and is TERRIBLY UNFAIR. You DO NOT DESERVE this. But it is happening and out of your control. And you car getting vandalized is just kicking you while you're already down. I pray for strength for you to get through this terrible phase. Thank God you're at least alive and have not been hurt by that creature that you used to call "husband". I'm so sorry he turned out to be such a hurtful fake. But thank God he didn't mame or even KILL you. Speaking of psychopaths/sociopaths, does Scott Peterson ring a bell? They are capable of ANYTHING. Hang in there. We're here for you, too. |
sending you love and prayers. and a hug. You are not defined by him. It feels like it, but you aren't. You are way more than the choices he has made. |
babe 30 1980, my husband was never home worked 3rd shift.. I did not drive. had 3 under 11 years of age.. the oldest almost died of an illness.. had to dress us all for the winter get on a bus go 3 miles and have to get off and walk 2 miles in the snow .. no kidding.. do a youtube Ivan Roseland he is now 44 and has done a talk on that day and how he became ill.. in a few months found my husband was sleeping around at work.. went to sleep in a railroad car and ended up in MO and called me to find him a way home.. you have got to be kidding.. in the spring started divorce papers it took 4 years.. my children and I would hid in the woods and camp to keep away from him.. their school never knew of the problem that was the 80's.. you can do this why because you are Woman hear Us Roar.. get tough, show the nails and hid the car.. hahahaha give him the chase of a life time.. and be smart.. you have a bunch of us here that have had to go thro the same old same ole. hahaha prayers and tea and hugs ardy |
I don't think there's a lot of degree when it comes to psychopaths. I hope you reported the vandalized car to the police. And I hope you can find support from a counselor -- this sounds like a lot to carry! |
It gets better! I'm seeing three different therapists now for different areas of the situation. According to the therapists that dealt with him when he was in rehab the outcome was he should be institutionalised and he will never be sane. I wish id known this sooner, I wouldn't have spent a year on the couch depressed about my life.. trying to fix the situation. The advice is cut him out of your life as quickly as possibly. To my horror he's tried to rape one of his own family members!!!!!????????!!! What on earth am I dealing with. |
Ardy was Ivan your ex!!!?? Bastard. |
KI, I'm so sorry this is happening in your life! I can't imagine how upsetting this must be for you. It's normal to feel shock, grief, and sadness right now. So many of us have blamed ourselves, to a degree, for the actions of our A's and states of our relationships, even though we really shouldn't. You know, maybe I should have been more like this, or said more of that, or shouldn't have acted so..... etc. You however, have an interesting situation in that he is a psychopath. This means that none of this is or ever was your fault! He's very very sick. They can be very charming and convincing, maybe why you never saw it. They lack empathy and moral conscience, maybe why he was able to carry on with so many other women all the while acting normal, the rules don't apply to him. They can be violent, hence the rape of a family member. You see, none of this is your fault! It's all him, all of it. I just wanted to offer you a different perspective, hoping maybe it will help a little. My heart goes out to you. I hope you're being really good to yourself through all of this. Hugs! |
Originally Posted by killerinstinct
(Post 4849821)
Ardy was Ivan your ex!!!?? Bastard. |
Sending you prayers of peace and strength during this time of struggle. Deep breath, slow down. You have a lot on your plate right now. You are grieving the man you thought you knew. The relationship you thought you had. It will take time to process it all. You have every right to feel, angry, betrayed, sad. Be easy on yourself and take care of yourself. Do you have anyone you can talk to? Sometimes just getting it all out in the open helps. Journaling also helps if you like to do that. I know that is what helps me when I am feeling like you are. Hang in there, you are not alone. |
O my goodness, what shocking news for you. I can only offer you my friendship. PM me anytime you need an ear. At least you know now and can move forward. Hugs, just huge hugs!!! |
I just want him out of my life... I feel like I'm tied to a serial killer or something that extreme .. |
Fear as women we have that inside alarm system that says Danger Will robinson Danger... know a couple of days ahead when my hubby is going to start to flip out.. my big fear in the night he will forget who Iam... no really... before we go to sleep.. Promise me Babe you do know who Iam.. repeat after me... I Love you Ardy... yep.. drivers him nuts... but we had a night that I locked the door on him in another room.. remember my home is a 1906 and the walls and doors maybe old but are made of Walnut nothing gets thro them even wild animals .. the next mornging Hon Why am I in here... threw a towel at him and pointed to the bathroom ... Iam smart about wild animals most of the sharp and things that would harm are hidden from view in 24 hours... eekekekkekeke when I met God Lucy He will have some Tall explaining to do.. yep... and humor my best weapon Humor.. know it sound bad.. but with 20 years of pratice behind me ... I know when to get the hell out of Dodge.. for over night.. hugs and prayers ardy... |
Ki- I'm excited for u to start a new life you deserve. I'm happy to see you are getting counselling and making healthy decisions for you. Its hard I know but you will come out of this stronger and wiser. |
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