mejo

And one more thing, before I get kicked off or this thread gets closed...I even wonder if you just need attention at this point. You totally turned this thread into seeing you supposed exs junk to how you are f'ing a married man!! Do you really need this site, or are you here to hurt the people who do?

readerbaby71

Omg, ahahahahahah!

Fly N Buy

Wow....

Me thinks other posts will soon be gone.....Folks, you may turn the channel or hit ignore button.

Hey Fandy.....
Won't see Paulie no more

Fathom

Wow, Pippi. I too am surprised at how low your bar has gotten. I've BTDT with a MG before. In fact, I married him. Guess who is my XAH now? I think I've learned my lesson that those guys bring drama into our lives no matter how much distance you think you're giving them.

That said, I guess I do understand the lure of a long distance "relationship" with a man who is courteous, smart, and interested. I've got a version of that going on right now too that I'm questioning myself on. My guy is not married, and I've known him for over a decade... But, I know I'm not the least bit attracted to him IRL. So, why do I persist in talking with him nightly, and accepting his wishes that I have sweet dreams? Because it's lovely. It's truly wonderful to share your life's happenings and discuss adult topics with a caring person of the opposite sex. Somehow, it feels really different than chatting with one of the many other women in my life. I miss that companionship in my life. I hadn't realized it until I started to catch up with him.

So, even though I understand what might drive you to pursue this affair, I also understand that it isn't necessarily good just because it feels good. The relationship is an illusion. I know I have been trying really hard to ignore red flags because, heck! We're both adults and this isn't likely to go anywhere anyway. But, that's the point, right? Who are we trying to kid? The only ones we're fooling are ourselves. Sound familiar?

We both deserve more from ourselves, Pippi. Honestly... If you're gonna have a bar, make sure it's at a reasonable height. Otherwise, it's a sign that you still have work to do on yourself... By yourself. (I'm telling myself the same thing)

Peace,
Fathom

Florence

Pippi, it's really unfortunate you don't see the irony of posting about being complicit in someone else's abusjve marriage in a thread about your ex's abusive relationship with you and your kids.

Your addiction to drama is part of the problem. No more married guys, unless you're cool with maintaining toxic relationships in your and your kids' lives.

Flavia2

He admits to being a sleazy liar and you think THIS is your Prince Charming? Someone who is deceitful enough to do this to his wife and children?
Pippi, take off the blinders.

Bullfrog

Sorry, but if I want attention-seeking and revisionist history, I would call up my XAH. I come here to share and receive support from people who are trying their darnedest to do better for themselves.

PippiLngstockng

Hi Fathom,

I don't know about my bar.

What I do know is that I met this man and the conversation was amazing. And our time together was crazy romantic. And his writing since has been lovely, and funny, and thoughtful and he is so profoundly smart. And he gets things right away that I don't know anyone who would get it.

I was pretty sure that there was something really significant happening between the two of us after the first hour that I spent talking with him. And then over time I was more sure. And yet I didn't think I would ever see him again. And with all this writing back and forth over the past five weeks I am amazed at how many levels we connect on.

I have all kinds of wonderful people in my life, including all of you.

But I keep returning to the subject of this man because something has happened between us.

And I may be a wretch and so is he. But I don't go around having these feelings for every person I meet.

I can't say when I have felt like this.

PippiLngstockng

And if it bugs you all We can go ask the mods to close this thread, ok?

Bullfrog

And you come to a site full of women who have been cheated on to give you the okay? It feels more like bragging, and kinda gross.

It's not okay. You are not going to get the okay here.

amy55

Again it's our fault. Please seek therapy.

LoveMeNow

Ahhhh, the perpetual victim.

amy55

Now for this romantic getaway of yours, with a married guy, who is paying for someone to watch the children? Or are they in charge of themselves?

mejo

Yeah, maybe it should be. But you are avoiding the fact he has a WIFE. How would you feel if you were married to him and he had a Pipi on the side? Are you thinking of her at all? I really would like to know the real reason you are potentially wrecking a family? Have you talked about this in therapy?

chicory

Pippi,

when I was young, my mom brought a drunk boyfriend home, and he wandered into our bedroom, and he was naked. I was pretty much scarred by that, as a young girl of 12. I still cannot get that picture out of my mind.

I assure you, your daughter, no matter how much she protests, has probably been scarred by seeing that picture of her own fathers privates.

Have you spent any time helping her to shake that awful experience? Can you get her some counseling? You may have your head in the clouds, thinking of mr. gorgeous, but your poor little daughter is thinking of what she saw. Unless your daughter has been around this sort of thing, she was upset by it.

This time in their lives, they need at least one parent who is present. Help them to feel secure, and how can you do that, when you are so preoccupied with a new mg?

I thought you were here for help with what happened with the cell phone pics?

CodeJob

You are kind Chicory to resurrect the original intent of this thread.

Chino

Are there any emotionally and mentally stable adults in those children's lives?

LadyinBC

It is a façade. Nothing more than a fantasy. Things would be different if you shared a life together because real life is different. This is nothing more than an escape from real life for both of you. I get that. I do understand how easy it is to get caught up in this when life is going crappy. Nothing good will come out of this because at some point the fantasy will collide with reality. You deserve better than this and so do your kids and so does his family.

Will keep you and your children in my thoughts and prayers Pippi.

greeteachday

Alrighty, then. We are on Page 5 and once more, the original topic is more than exhausted and other topics are totally unrelated to the reason for this forum. Maybe the OP would like to take this to Facebook or some other social media that deals with non-recovery matters and you can continue the conversation there? It's time to say good bye to the drama and go help some folks in need of support. We're done here.