loosingmymind

I really don't know what to expect, but I hope that it will help me get my head and my heart on the same path. I originally made this appointment 2 months ago because I actually thought I was losing my mind.

Maybe I am, but I have a feeling that the majority of my depression, low self esteem, feeling of hopelessness and anger stem largely from the hand I was dealt at home with the AH.

I am still at home. I more than likely should have been gone years ago, but I am here for now. My short term goal is to make it to next weekend when the last child moves onto college, then I am moving into their room. AH does not know this yet. Should be an interesting event.

Long(er) term is that by no later than the first of the year to be out. I have held on for so long thinking that it/he would get better, but I now know that it is not possible.

Although he is a great guy, hard worker, provider etc., I don't need to or want to be with an alcoholic. Sooooo many things that I have changed and let go of over the years that I want or like and I feel like I have just given so much of myself away, that it will take years to get back to me.

Stung

Good for you for taking care of yourself!

I've been seeing my counselor for months now and it really is making me respond better to my AH's nonsense (like not reacting to him, especially angrily), I'm forming better habits with my kids and more aware of how I treat them (priceless), and I've learned a great deal about myself and why I do the things that I do.

I entered counseling without any goals but just because I thought it was likely that I needed it because living with an active alcoholic is crazy making. I hope that you reach your goals and become more confident in your decisions and make the choices that are best for you!

Sending you hugs!

bringiton

If I could get counseling everyday I would! I went far too long without it. I have just recently starting going and I have to say I was shocked at one point - I told my therapist about a recent even and the look of shock and empathy on her face took me by surprise. She justified my pain and confusion. Having someone show you that you are not crazy and explain why you feel and behave the way you do is such a gift. I think most of us suffer far too long before we get help. I applaud you for going and taking care of yourself! Even if your plan doesn't play out exactly as you thought it would for whatever reason and least you are moving in the right direction!!

meggem

Good for you !! I would love to get into counseling but my current excuse is that I 'don't have time" Hope it helps