Carlotta

I put my Sponsor on a pedestal. I looked to her for all the answers and saw her as my mother, friend, mentor— a goddess. She appeared to be more than I could ever be; she was perfect. One day she made a mistake and fell from the pedestal on which I had placed her. How could she be so human? How dare she display such imperfection? At first I felt frightened and abandoned. But my Sponsor’s slide from grace led me to see that I was responsible for my own Al‑Anon program. I found that the “answers” she had given me were simply her own experience, strength, and hope, along with her understanding of the Twelve Steps of recovery. I learned that the tools of the program are available to me too. And I learned that, although she was my Sponsor, we were both changing, stumbling, growing members of Al‑Anon. Most importantly, I learned that setting a human being up to be perfect creates inevitable failure.

Sponsorship is a friendship made up of two members learning from one another, . . . two people learning a new way to live—one day at a time.