Stung

Yeah, you're just quacking. You keep sleeping with marrieds as long as you need to, Pippi. What ES&H are you looking for? You're using and it doesn't sound like you're ready to stop yet. Honestly I think your posts should be in the substance abuse side. If these married men were alcohol you'd be a double winner. When you're ready to stop this nonsense, you will. You're not ready to stop yet.

PippiLngstockng

I'm sorry, hopeful. I'm praying.

Fandy

it's obvious that you like men, anyone else's man. i think that is called raging hormones before menopause.

parents should to lead by example. Now you can't count on your husband to do the right thing, but you do know better. your kids that get to witness both their father's and mother's bad examples. don't be surprised if they emmulate.

PippiLngstockng

I agree, Stung.

hopeful4

Pippi, you don't need to be sorry to me. I fear that eventually you will be very sorry to yourself and your children. You are better than that. You have been so hurt by your husband. I understand looking for companionship from a kind and sober person. I just think before you are ready for that you have to come to terms with who you, Pippi, are. You have not done that yet.

Let go of the married ones Pipp, you are better than that. The need for validation from the other sex is fine on a healthy level. When you need that so badly you are having any sort of affair with married men, not so healthy at all.

Hugs Pippi.

Stung

I have no advice or ES&H for you then. I want to tell you what to do and how to do it. Obviously that isn't going to work here for you (because that apparently doesn't work with anyone ever.) I'd go on the other side and see what they say there. I do have vices that I use when I'm feeling down but my vices don't have the opportunity to impact my life with the magnitude that yours is likely effecting you.

Do they have open AA meetings in your area?

In the meantime, please do take care of yourself. Hugs, lady.

PippiLngstockng

I am sorry Stung. It's just that knowing what I know about this culture, if I went to an AA meeting here, and told them anything that I have touched upon on these virtual pages, the response might not be particularly helpful to me.

I might meet a friendly single man though.

I do know single men around here. The ones who are nice seem like their health is going and they'd need me to take care of them. Or they are kind of scuzzy. I don't know ones who are in good health and nice.

Stung

Pippi, you do not need a man. You need to love and respect yourself. You keep avoiding that entirely. Men are your vodka.

PippiLngstockng

No, I don't need one. I do need to sort myself out.

Maybe when I start working in a few weeks and the children go back to school, I'll stop all this nonsense.

LivingLife4Me

How about stop all this nonsense now. It really is ridiculous. You need some serious therapy.

Sue

PippiLngstockng

Overall, Sue, I am doing pretty okay, actually.

I am pretty sure I am going to come out of this just fine.

AnvilheadII

Hey ADMINS - can this thread be moved down to the Cafe since it is titled to be OFF TOPIC and is in NO WAY relevant to recovery???? and is in fact distasteful at best and a real slap in the face to many. personally i think it should be closed.

Rosalba

We are not responsible for people being attracted to us; we ARE responsible for how we deal with it. I do not find it a problem to say to a married/engaged guy: "You're married, aren't you? I don't get involved with married men. It's just something I don't do."

End of conversation. No affair, no drama, no chaos. When we enter into a new relationship, we risk getting hurt because we will make ourselves vulnerable. That's just part of being in a relationship. It's just a risk, though.

When we enter into a new relationship with someone who's already involved with someone else, it will be a CERTAINTY that someone will get hurt. Quite probably more than one person, one of whom will be hurt through no fault of their own.

I just think there are better ways of living your life.

PippiLngstockng

Anvilhead, you can request things of admins without posting directly on a thread itself. You'd probably get a quicker response.

I don't know what just prompted you to get so angry.

PippiLngstockng

I am sorry for somehow getting a few nice people upset here.

I am going to get off-line and wish us all peace.

Thank you to all of you who entered into this conversation. I am tired. I am a mess from everything that's happened with xah. But I do think this will all pass and I'll be okay.

Dee74

If anyone wants to contact a mod or admin, please report a post or send a PM.

It's impossible for us to read every post here every day.
There are thousands of posts and only a few mods.

ps TYPING IN CAPITALS does not make your request any louder

Dee
Moderator
SR