QUACKERs.... Part 3
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: OREGON
Posts: 228
Oh, I am onto more quacking..... ha.
I wonder if my dad was drinking so much just to cope with my narcissistic mother?
I wonder if I was drinking so much to cope with my narcissistic ex wife?
He said that a lot. Along with, now that she is out of my life, I don't feel the need to drink! Oh Lordy.... that one lasted long.
But silly me.... I fell for it.... he might have been doing the quacking but I was doing the waddling for sure....
I wonder if my dad was drinking so much just to cope with my narcissistic mother?
I wonder if I was drinking so much to cope with my narcissistic ex wife?
He said that a lot. Along with, now that she is out of my life, I don't feel the need to drink! Oh Lordy.... that one lasted long.
But silly me.... I fell for it.... he might have been doing the quacking but I was doing the waddling for sure....
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: The Bright Side of the Moon
Posts: 528
My X would pull that, "I hadn't eaten enough and that's why I got so wasted" card. Like they're powerless to go eat something. When you have beer for breakfast and lunch, that excuse is great. Not eating enough was his excuse when he passed out on our bedroom floor at 9 pm when our son was 2 days old. I had to get up out of bed and kick out the impromptu party that he and our alcoholic friends had started. He was keeping me fed that day, so he totally had chances to eat.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: OREGON
Posts: 228
That made me think.... ha.... so long ago, but when my oldest was born, I lived in Hawaii. My ex-husband was in the Army stationed over there. My parents had come for her birth and were staying with us, the first grandbaby... She was late, so my dad had to fly home but my mom stayed behind. We had to drive to the hospital which was about 45 minutes away. My first born was the hardest birth. 31 hours hard labor, contractions about 1-2 minutes apart for 31 hours. I weighed all of 125 lbs at full term, so I was small, and she was an impressive nearly 10 lb baby.... By the time I was done, I was so tired. They didn't let the baby room with the mothers then, so she went to the nursery. I was just so tired, and the doctor said I needed to rest. He said it was the longest birth he had been a part of to that point, and my body needed to rest. So I did. My ex and mom went back to our condo to sleep and he returned that night. He brought one of our friends with him to see the baby. They visited about an hour, and then he took my mom back to the condo and he drove back into Honolulu to go partying....
I deserve this as this is my first born! What a crock. I was so angry with him. It is good back then, they made the moms stay in the hospital at least three days before being released. It gave me time to cool off.
I deserve this as this is my first born! What a crock. I was so angry with him. It is good back then, they made the moms stay in the hospital at least three days before being released. It gave me time to cool off.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Iowa
Posts: 3,050
First phone call since the drunken rant six weeks ago over the results of the child support hearing.
"I need to know what you spent that child support money on. I also need forms from the insurance program (Medicaid), I was supposed to send those in on the 12th."
Sure, I'll get right on that.
"I need to know what you spent that child support money on. I also need forms from the insurance program (Medicaid), I was supposed to send those in on the 12th."
Sure, I'll get right on that.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 39
new quacktext yesterday, out of the blue...
ABF; I really feel like having sex with you
Me; (wtf) You really need help and a punch on your head!
ABF; so we're not having sex?
later...
ABF; I really miss you...
ABF; I love you...
ABF; I know I am an ass xxx
later...
ABF; So I am not gonna see you again?
Me; If you'r ever gonna do what you need to do. But that's not gonna happen so NO. I'm done!
ABF; Okay! than not!
Me: I'm done with the excuses the selfpitystories, the agression. I've been patient enough. You are on your own, you need rockbottom, so have fun!
ABF: OK, I'll stop...
ME; I'm done talking to a bottle of alcohol, you can only contact me when you are sober.
ABF; Okay goodbye wh*re...
Me: (fed up with his nasty mean namecalling and out of reach of flying beercans) whatever, at least a **** does something for her money, what are you doing for society, you'll only cost us money, who's gonna go to Afrika for the second time this year? If you are really serious in quitting you can do it everywhere, bye I'm done...
Later
ABF;it's not important
30 mins. later
ABF;is it?
another 30 mins later
ABF; is it hard?
50 mins. later
ABF;Clematis?
10 mins. later
ABF;okay it's clear!!!
Just so fed up with his behaviour, what a nutcase...
ABF; I really feel like having sex with you
Me; (wtf) You really need help and a punch on your head!
ABF; so we're not having sex?
later...
ABF; I really miss you...
ABF; I love you...
ABF; I know I am an ass xxx
later...
ABF; So I am not gonna see you again?
Me; If you'r ever gonna do what you need to do. But that's not gonna happen so NO. I'm done!
ABF; Okay! than not!
Me: I'm done with the excuses the selfpitystories, the agression. I've been patient enough. You are on your own, you need rockbottom, so have fun!
ABF: OK, I'll stop...
ME; I'm done talking to a bottle of alcohol, you can only contact me when you are sober.
ABF; Okay goodbye wh*re...
Me: (fed up with his nasty mean namecalling and out of reach of flying beercans) whatever, at least a **** does something for her money, what are you doing for society, you'll only cost us money, who's gonna go to Afrika for the second time this year? If you are really serious in quitting you can do it everywhere, bye I'm done...
Later
ABF;it's not important
30 mins. later
ABF;is it?
another 30 mins later
ABF; is it hard?
50 mins. later
ABF;Clematis?
10 mins. later
ABF;okay it's clear!!!
Just so fed up with his behaviour, what a nutcase...
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
LOL.
I remember long ago when we were in college my X got a DUI. His excuse was had he not eaten the food there he would not have gotten a dui as since there was food in his stomach the booze stayed there instead of him peeing it out.
Then he would flip to the booze is hitting him harder b/c he had not eaten anything.
Well, which is it??
Ahhh.....so so so glad that I no longer care which it is! This is no longer in my hula hoop!
I remember long ago when we were in college my X got a DUI. His excuse was had he not eaten the food there he would not have gotten a dui as since there was food in his stomach the booze stayed there instead of him peeing it out.
Then he would flip to the booze is hitting him harder b/c he had not eaten anything.
Well, which is it??
Ahhh.....so so so glad that I no longer care which it is! This is no longer in my hula hoop!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 278
Codies quack too.
My father was an alcoholic; my ex-husband was not. In the days before we were married, my then fiancé spent the day with my father; they went to the pub in the evening, and my fella was falling-down drunk, throwing up and generally in a very bad way due to drinking far more than he was used to.
I felt so disgusted with him I couldn't bring myself to go near him.
I got a very angry response from my mother. "Go and sort him out - you can't expect him to go drinking with his future father-in-law and refuse drinks when they're offered!"
Mum enabled not only my father, but two of my brothers; one of them now has an injunction against him going near the house after he tried to strangle her. To this day, she maintains that my father wasn't an alcoholic because he didn't wake up every morning craving a drink.
My father was an alcoholic; my ex-husband was not. In the days before we were married, my then fiancé spent the day with my father; they went to the pub in the evening, and my fella was falling-down drunk, throwing up and generally in a very bad way due to drinking far more than he was used to.
I felt so disgusted with him I couldn't bring myself to go near him.
I got a very angry response from my mother. "Go and sort him out - you can't expect him to go drinking with his future father-in-law and refuse drinks when they're offered!"
Mum enabled not only my father, but two of my brothers; one of them now has an injunction against him going near the house after he tried to strangle her. To this day, she maintains that my father wasn't an alcoholic because he didn't wake up every morning craving a drink.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,958
Son: I threw up overnight
AH: That's because you ate a junky dinner (the meal I prepared that was served with a side of chips instead of the rice or potato he'd have preferred).
The entire family are it and only one person was sick.
AH: That's because you ate a junky dinner (the meal I prepared that was served with a side of chips instead of the rice or potato he'd have preferred).
The entire family are it and only one person was sick.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: texas
Posts: 43
'I only drink at night' (gets up at 4pm, beer run "errands" at 5, 7pm-3/4am binge) rinse...repeat.
'My friend xxxx, she has big problems bleeding ulcers etc. now she can't stop'. Ax drinks a case in one setting
'I have vices, it's under control'
'I still have a job, family, I'm fine'. Has called in sick so many times her work had cut off all options for anymore changes in schedule, family has moved hours away
'Dr. Says I'm healthy as a horse, women live a long time in my family'. On pills for high blood pressure/ very high cholesterol. Underweight, skin sagging off legs and arms (shes 57) and takes sleeping pills
'Im getting older I hurt all the time. I need to stop working out (hasn't in a year) I'm learning more about the physical pain associated with alcohol.
'My friend xxxx, she has big problems bleeding ulcers etc. now she can't stop'. Ax drinks a case in one setting
'I have vices, it's under control'
'I still have a job, family, I'm fine'. Has called in sick so many times her work had cut off all options for anymore changes in schedule, family has moved hours away
'Dr. Says I'm healthy as a horse, women live a long time in my family'. On pills for high blood pressure/ very high cholesterol. Underweight, skin sagging off legs and arms (shes 57) and takes sleeping pills
'Im getting older I hurt all the time. I need to stop working out (hasn't in a year) I'm learning more about the physical pain associated with alcohol.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 2,349
I like to sleep on the floor, it's more comfortable.
AH said this the AM after I found him passed out, I couldn't wake him and was super close to calling 911) on the family room floor just 2 feet away from a big dog poop! Our shepherd was 15 and had lost control of her number 2's and she would poop in her sleep and she slept on mats we left around for her so it was easy to clean up. I took a picture of him and sent it to him (yes, this was before Al Anon) via text. I forget what his response was. I mean, what could your response be?
AH said this the AM after I found him passed out, I couldn't wake him and was super close to calling 911) on the family room floor just 2 feet away from a big dog poop! Our shepherd was 15 and had lost control of her number 2's and she would poop in her sleep and she slept on mats we left around for her so it was easy to clean up. I took a picture of him and sent it to him (yes, this was before Al Anon) via text. I forget what his response was. I mean, what could your response be?
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
lizatola, I remember when my X would be passed out on the floor in the living room, me and my DD who was about 7 at the time would just step over him like it was the most normal thing in the world. Ugh....why oh why did I not leave earlier??!!
I had not thought about that in a long time! It's amazing to see what we allow our normal to become.
I had not thought about that in a long time! It's amazing to see what we allow our normal to become.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: KY
Posts: 3
Omg!!!! This is my first post but I have some doozies. AH and I are separating.
Last Friday drinking his depression that I asked for separation after 19 years
AH: you're addicted too, you're addicted to supplements.
ME: you can't be addicted to supplements.
AH: why do you freak out when you get low?
ME: I've been low for a month and put off ordering the prescribed supplements I need because our bills are crazy because you lost your job in July.
He regularly brings up past anxiety and depression I had. When our girls were little I was nearly bedridden from it. He blames our problems on that. Or says that he didn't give up on me why am I giving up on him. I told him the difference is I admitted I had a problem and got help.
He also told me during that time he wanted to help me get well so I could take care of the girls if anything happens to him. Then takes credit for my complete recovery from my anxiety and depression. I said be careful what you wish for. In reality he did have something to do with it. But not all.
Oh and I love the one he gives....I can't go to AA they never take responsibility for their actions. Hello????? NEITHER DO YOU.....QUACK
Last Friday drinking his depression that I asked for separation after 19 years
AH: you're addicted too, you're addicted to supplements.
ME: you can't be addicted to supplements.
AH: why do you freak out when you get low?
ME: I've been low for a month and put off ordering the prescribed supplements I need because our bills are crazy because you lost your job in July.
He regularly brings up past anxiety and depression I had. When our girls were little I was nearly bedridden from it. He blames our problems on that. Or says that he didn't give up on me why am I giving up on him. I told him the difference is I admitted I had a problem and got help.
He also told me during that time he wanted to help me get well so I could take care of the girls if anything happens to him. Then takes credit for my complete recovery from my anxiety and depression. I said be careful what you wish for. In reality he did have something to do with it. But not all.
Oh and I love the one he gives....I can't go to AA they never take responsibility for their actions. Hello????? NEITHER DO YOU.....QUACK
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 72
Originally Posted by Radiant 
I have more of an experience:
Went out to eat have drinks in hand he falls off the edge of the booth seat
AH: You saw that didn't you?
ME: Yup the whole restaurant saw that
AH : Tea does that sometimes
Went out to eat have drinks in hand he falls off the edge of the booth seat
AH: You saw that didn't you?
ME: Yup the whole restaurant saw that
AH : Tea does that sometimes
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 982
Conversation occurs after I have spent the entire day taking care of our 1 and 2 year olds and AH's 6 year old nephew, and AH has been at work (taking swigs off his vodka bottle throughout the day). I'm giving the kids a bath, but have to go upstairs to grab soap and washcloth
Me: "Can you sit with the kids for a sec while I run upstairs?" He does, but when I come back into the bathroom, he says:
"You know, no other guy would do this much for you after working all day. I have had to deal with people asking you to do sh** all day and then I come home and it's more of the same. You guys are all driving me insane. And you wonder why I need a drink to calm down."
Ummm... I've been dealing with three kids all day long!!!!!!!!
Me: "Can you sit with the kids for a sec while I run upstairs?" He does, but when I come back into the bathroom, he says:
"You know, no other guy would do this much for you after working all day. I have had to deal with people asking you to do sh** all day and then I come home and it's more of the same. You guys are all driving me insane. And you wonder why I need a drink to calm down."
Ummm... I've been dealing with three kids all day long!!!!!!!!
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