Feeling sad anxious and bewildered
 

I don't get what I did that I am ready to file for divorce. My emotions are all over the place with the main thought is what did I do ? I did not deserve any of the stuff he dished out to me, but he thinks I should be the scum of the earth. I know alcohol distorts little things that others just take for granted and lets it roll.

I feel very guilty about my kids here they are making plans for the future as a family and I feel like a major lier in letting them go on knowing I'm going through with a divorce and shaking up the foundation of their existence.

I know AH has seen a lawyer also and I think he just thinks this is just one big game that he wants to win at all cost.

I just don't get it.

Sorry if I am rambling.

Yeah, you would have to be crazy to make sense of crazy.

I think I have quit trying to do that. Dunno, either.