junk2006

Hello I just joined this forum because I am really super scared. We confronted my brother about his drug and alcohol abuse problem about a week ago and he entered into rehab. Yesterday he had a visit with my mother which did not go well and in which he kept on blaming her for his problems. During the meeting she asked him to sign a power of attorney in order to keep his affairs in order while he is in rehab. In the middle of the night my brother left rehab because he said he wanted to reread the power of attorney form. My family and I yelled at him and we were very upset with his decision to leave the facility in the middle of the night to read a document something that we could have happily discussed with him the next day. Is it typical for rehab programs to accept people back after leaving in the middle of the night? I am very worried about my mother as well as she has problems with stress.

redatlanta

My guess is no. You could call and ask but usually when a patient voluntarily leaves like that in the middle of the night the writing is on the wall.

This isn't about the POA. Not one bit. Brother isn't committed to the program.

Maybe you will get lucky and he will decide to return and they will take him back but don't be surprised if you hear "I don't have a problem I am not like those people" speech.

CodeJob

Hi Junk,

Welcome to SR. I hope you read around on various sections and stickies. There is a lot of great info and wise people here. This site can teach you to think and react differently towards your qualifier.

RedAtl is 100% correct. Your brother is not done.

My H said exactly that following his outpatient program. It made my stomach drop as I knew he'd make another round. He really struggled to get out of inpatient. I turned my phone off and gave it to someone else to hold those first few days. Now something made him settle in and do the program. He calls rehab "that place" and still cannot name what he is. He claims I betrayed him and I made him go there. Whatever. This is the crackerjack sober. He might have brain damage or just not capable of adult emotions. It is really sad. He is 13 mo sober. This morning as I prayed, I was realizing perhaps the main problem is I outgrew our relationship. He drank. I lived and matured. Even being Codie, I am starting to question if he can catch up to me. We are just terribly unbalanced emotionally in our relationship.

Peace to you and your family. Letting go is so painful.

Hawkeye13

He's not done and looking for an excuse

Detach and my best advice is for none of the family to "rescue" him in any way, shape, or form.

He has to want it for treatment to work.
Maybe he still needs to find his bottom.

I'm very sorry your hopes have been dashed. Alcoholics are good at doing that.

BadCompany

Yikes!

junk2006

Ya I know that is a big deal but honestly we need to do it because before he went into rehab he bought a house and we need to finish the closing and the moving and everything really. As well he has kids and the POA will help with the school and medical stuff.

I would like to add to anyone following this thread that he ended up going back to rehab. He didn't use drugs or get drunk he basically just came in the middle of night to yell at us and put my mother down and the rehab facility took him back. The counselors said they were really surprised because they thought he was doing really well. I am very upset that they would let him leave in the middle of the night without giving us a heads up. I am so confused as to why he would do something like this.

He says the rehab is going well too and that they understand him but he feels like my family is not being supportive despite the fact that we are the ones that did the intervention and paid for the rehab(which surprisingly isn't cheap)

I appreciate all the support and thank you so much.

Recovering2

Well, I'm sorry he left like that to cause your Mom more angst...but glad he went back. My suggestion is for all of you to now step back and leave it to him to figure out. If he's really doing the work, he will have to deal with his role in things and quit blaming others.

Your family would now likely benefit from AlAnon while he is away in treatment. You all need recovery from this as much as he does. AlAnon is a great place to start healing.

Hawkeye13

Glad to hear he went back too.

Family, please take care of yourselves now