More disappointments

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Old 05-18-2014, 09:09 AM
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Pia
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More disappointments

I learned AH has been using Crystal Meth. I felt like I was punched in the stomach when I found out. I was so scared, disgusted and angry all at the same time.

I know nothing about crystal meth but, I do know I am done researching his addictions.

Something in me changed and I don't feel responsible for him anymore. I don't need to be ashamed for his choices.
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Old 05-18-2014, 09:11 AM
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I'm sorry, Radiant. (((HUGS)))

No, you aren't responsible and you don't have to be ashamed of his choices. You don't have to live with them, either.
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Old 05-18-2014, 09:16 AM
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Crystal meth is so scary and damaging. Protect yourself and whatever assets you may have. I know this sounds dramatic, but I have seen people destroy their lives and die from it in a matter of months

I am so, so sorry.
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Old 05-18-2014, 09:23 AM
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sorry radiant, so very very sorry. and good for you on not researching any more of his addictions.....I think we get to a place that we already know all we need to know about what the addict is doing....the next thing we need to know, is....what now for me?

again, i'm sorry...
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Old 05-18-2014, 09:26 AM
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Thank you friends- He doesn't live here anymore and his stuff is gone. I changed the locks and code to garage and added extra locks on the doors and even in the rooms so he can't get in.

Boy how ignorant I am about drugs. I saw his arms and legs and thought wow they sure are skinny and what are those red dots. He said they were chigger bites and I feel for it.

One of my friends he talked to about me said can you blame her for leaving you? That made me feel good.

I'm going to be ok I think I just needed to vent. thank you for hearing my sad story.
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Old 05-18-2014, 09:40 AM
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So sorry Radiant but what a blessing to find your strength. Good for you on changing the locks, for him being gone, and all the others things you're doing to make life better for you. Big hugs and I'll be praying for you. Stay safe!
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Old 05-18-2014, 09:56 AM
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So I have a clogged garbage disposal I have been on utube learning what to do.

Months ago I would of been in tears and in a chaotic state thinking the end of the world what am I going to do!!! I better call AH I better get this fixed right away.

I have since learned how to mow my yard, paint and now unclogging drains.
If unclogging a garbage disposal is the most annoying thing that is going to happen in my life going forward I welcome it.
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Old 05-18-2014, 10:23 AM
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I love the YouTube 'How To' videos! Good for you, Radiant!!
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Old 05-18-2014, 10:30 AM
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As time goes by you really do heal in a way you can't imagine. Kinda like telling a new mother when you go into labor it's going to hurt. Until you go through it you just don't fully understand.

I use to think "To not think of someone else was selfish now I feel to not think of myself is just cruel"
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Old 05-18-2014, 10:31 AM
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I was so proud of myself when I installed my own garbage disposal!!

I am Woman, watch me Rawr!!

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Old 05-18-2014, 10:33 AM
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Originally Posted by biminiblue View Post
I was so proud of myself when I installed my own garbage disposal!!

I am Woman, watch me Rawr!!

Ha Ha Ha good job and how freaken cute!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 05-18-2014, 10:35 AM
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oops, the kitten gif didn't animate right. I put another one in.
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Old 05-18-2014, 10:52 AM
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how cute!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 05-19-2014, 05:23 AM
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Radiant, you are an inspiration to me! I am not exactly "Ms. Handyperson" and I am so impressed that you're handling stuff like fixing the garbage disposal.

Oh, and pretty impressed w/what you're doing w/your life, too...

I'd like to second the comment about crystal meth and how fast a person can go under, using it. It's good that you have all his stuff out, locks changed, etc. He could turn into someone you can't even imagine in a very short time.

Thank you so much for sharing, and kudos on your growth, strength and courage thru all of this!
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Old 05-19-2014, 05:42 AM
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I think you truly are an amazing woman Radiant--

I'm so glad you are away from him now as CM addiction is such a slippery slope.

You also are officially nominated for "Handywoman of the Week"

Congratulations. Your Lowes gift certificate will be at the front desk . . .
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Old 05-19-2014, 05:45 AM
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Lol!!!!!!!!!
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:45 AM
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Im so sorry Radiant. That had to be so very hard learning that about your AH. Crystal Meth is so highly addictive and so hard to get off of for the addict. You are stronger than you realize and you can face this. Take care of yourself. Hugs
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Old 05-19-2014, 07:12 AM
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Radiant, I am so sorry, but so glad you got away! I am going to get on YouTube for my garbage disposal too!

Yesterday I cut down some smaller (but still large for me) trees, cut down three sticker bushes, mowed the yard, trimmed, set up our new BBQ grill, cleaned and set up the patio furniture, planted a bunch of flowers, all sorts of stuff. OK, the BBQ grill was the hardest I admit, but boy was I proud when it fired up (Gas grill).

So, I have these two older gentlemen who are my neighbors. Love them, they are great. When my mower would not start yesterday, he started to come over. I told him to hold on, and after a bit I got it. He said the look on my face was priceless!

There really is pride in taking care of things and knowing you can accomplish what you think you could not! My XAH is a lazy one, so it's likely I would have done a lot of this myself anyways, however, it felt really good to know I did it all by myself!

And one last thing my friend. As far as not knowing about those red dots on his legs, that is a good thing. You don't want to have to be educated enough in addiction that you see dots on someone's legs and think they are on meth. You have left addiction behind, that is a wonderful thing.

Tight Hugs!
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Old 05-19-2014, 08:55 AM
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::hugs::

Sorry to hear of his choices, but glad to hear you are making your own.
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Old 05-19-2014, 11:00 AM
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Ugh! An active alcoholic meth head is never a good combo! I'm so sorry Radiant, I'm sure I would have felt much the same way you have. You should never feel ashamed of or responsible for someone else's actions. Ever.

So glad to hear that you are completely separated from AH, it could get really ugly if you were still together. You sound strong and very accepting of what is and I think that's a great place to be.

When I bought my house, I was recently divorced and living alone for the first time ever. I found great satisfaction in being Miss Fixit, and Super Yard Girl. I replaced all electrical outlets and switches in my home and single handedly maintained one of the nicer yards on the block. It was empowering to say the least!

I found this book to be very helpful Home Improvement 1-2-3: Expert Advice from The Home Depot (Home Depot ... 1-2-3): The Home Depot: 9780696213274: Amazon.com: Books
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