Great quote from SR Member
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Peoria, IL
Posts: 32
Great quote from SR Member
"Alcoholics, though, they kind of cheat on you with the bottle, right? At least it's not another person, another emotional connection." - inpieces
I have always felt this way! Thank you for posting this...although the thread it pertained to is very sad.
I have learned so much in 36 hours. I actually FEEL better, and am taking my power back, one minute at a time. Major baby steps at this juncture.
I was so proud of myself, and this is so small - I knew my AH was at the A neighbor's. Instead of looking over and calling after a few hours, I went about my biz, did work, gave my son a bath (although I've been up since 3 am and he avoided responsibility all day), I thought, you know, where he is and what he does is NOT my business. I'm not going to chastise him for being a crappy dad with no job. I didn't look out my windows to see if he was drinking. Instead of being hurt at not being spoken to or minimized, I stayed in my own space, not bothering to go into his, nosing around for attention. The A neighbor made my AH dinner for the 3rd day, and I thought, if he wants to do that, great! Go get mooch off of someone else for a change!!! Either AN or his wife will get sick of it!
Now he's gone to bed and I'm still up working. I only spoke when spoken to, cordially. No passive aggression. Nite nite. I'm going to read and not ruminate and go to pieces anymore.
I did a lot of reading on the alcoholic mind, and there were limitless things I never knew. But I cut myself off after a while, bc that's enough time he gets from me, and I'm doing it for myself, my own knowledge, not to fix him bc I can't, no one can. I don't think even he can. He doesn't even know who he is.
I hope it sticks. I was a tired mess today. Thank you for your support, all of you!!!
. And thank you inpieces for that wonderful quote!!!
I have always felt this way! Thank you for posting this...although the thread it pertained to is very sad.
I have learned so much in 36 hours. I actually FEEL better, and am taking my power back, one minute at a time. Major baby steps at this juncture.
I was so proud of myself, and this is so small - I knew my AH was at the A neighbor's. Instead of looking over and calling after a few hours, I went about my biz, did work, gave my son a bath (although I've been up since 3 am and he avoided responsibility all day), I thought, you know, where he is and what he does is NOT my business. I'm not going to chastise him for being a crappy dad with no job. I didn't look out my windows to see if he was drinking. Instead of being hurt at not being spoken to or minimized, I stayed in my own space, not bothering to go into his, nosing around for attention. The A neighbor made my AH dinner for the 3rd day, and I thought, if he wants to do that, great! Go get mooch off of someone else for a change!!! Either AN or his wife will get sick of it!
Now he's gone to bed and I'm still up working. I only spoke when spoken to, cordially. No passive aggression. Nite nite. I'm going to read and not ruminate and go to pieces anymore.
I did a lot of reading on the alcoholic mind, and there were limitless things I never knew. But I cut myself off after a while, bc that's enough time he gets from me, and I'm doing it for myself, my own knowledge, not to fix him bc I can't, no one can. I don't think even he can. He doesn't even know who he is.
I hope it sticks. I was a tired mess today. Thank you for your support, all of you!!!
. And thank you inpieces for that wonderful quote!!!
Magsie
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,644
Ariel, congratulations on taking baby steps to look after the welfare of yourself and your son.
You're right, your husband can only help himself, hopefully he will get help one day before it's too late and he loses all that is dear to him.
All the best, keep posting, there is a fantastic amount of help and advice here, it's helped me immensely in the last months, I was the drinker.
Love and hugs for you and your son love Mags xx
You're right, your husband can only help himself, hopefully he will get help one day before it's too late and he loses all that is dear to him.
All the best, keep posting, there is a fantastic amount of help and advice here, it's helped me immensely in the last months, I was the drinker.
Love and hugs for you and your son love Mags xx
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