How to handle my children and alcoholism
 

My 17 year old daughter just called me to pick her up at a friends house. She had been drinking. This is the 2nd time I know of that she has experimented with alcohol. Abuse runs strong in my family (my father and his father) and her dad is an alcholic. We divorced 20 months ago because of problems it caused. I had always told her not to drink and drive. I am proud of her for calling. Now what do I do so she wont drink next time but if she does she will not be tempted to drive home? What is the balance here?

as a youngster i can tell you to remain calm in the situation. to have an angry parent makes us less likely to feel secure enough to call and ask for that help. since she is young, she is going to experiment. sounds like she tried to strike a balance by calling you and not driving. that is a great decision on her part. however it's not acceptable for her to call consistantly because she is getting drunk frequently. making sure you have a stong bond and unit at the home helps a great deal. have you talked to her about the dangers of alcohol? does she know about the abuse that runs in the family? she needs to know that even though you understand the stress she might be experiencing (the divorce, not having dad at home) is difficult it is not an excuse to pick up a bottle and get drunk. is she having any other problems? problems at school, with friends, changes in behavior? pay close attention to the signs she is giving you. whether she realizes it or not her behavior will tell you what she is going thru right now. hope this helps a little. my grandfather was an alcoholic and my mom had to deal with me a few times in high school. keep posting and make your way to the alcohol forums. there you can find a suppor tgroup for family members such as yourself. you are in my prayers.

Lady Warrior,

I moved your thread here, so you will get some real good support. Your other thread is still in the Newcomers forum.