Maybe now some guidance

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Old 07-04-2004, 07:24 PM
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jrh
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Ft. Lauderdale, FL
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Maybe now some guidance

Just found this site and can't believe what I've read before joining. All the things I've been going through with an AW (even started figuring out the abbreviations). Don't think it makes any difference if AW or AH-all seems the same trip through hell.

I will be spending some time reviewing previous posts and then hope to ask for some direction. Have all but given up on a 16 year marriage and don't know why I should try anymore to help her or us. Thanks so much for everyone's openness-I think it will help me.
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Old 07-04-2004, 07:40 PM
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hello and welcome,

one of the first things alanon teaches us is not to make any rash decisions for a while until we know what we want. read the power posts on this site about detachment and about the 12 steps.

there is an 800 number to the nearest alanon group to where you live. use it. go to a meeting, there you will find people who have been exactly where you are now. they will begin the process of helping you to help yourself to a healthier future. a future with or without your spouse.

many when we find the door to alanon are so worn out from years of hurt, anger, denial, manipulation, and controlling the uncontrollable. we are ready to toss it all out the window. alanon teaches us a healthier way of living. a way of being able to see our part in our hurt. it also helps us to heal. to become healthy of mind, spirit and body.

welcome and i wish for you peace, joy and happiness. the program only works if you work it. good luck.
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Old 07-04-2004, 07:43 PM
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Hey jrh,
Welcome to Sober Recovery. I'm glad you're here.
As you can see, we all know what you're dealing with.
The sticky posts at the top of the board have some great information in them.
Pull up a chair and get comfortable.
Gabe
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Old 07-04-2004, 07:57 PM
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Chy
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Welcome to SR!

You'll find a lot of support here! Until she's ready I'm afraid nothing will change. Does she want to quit, does she want help? But in the mean time you stick around here and get to know the Anon's here, they're awesome!
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Old 07-04-2004, 08:59 PM
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JT
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Welcome to SR!!

Read all you want and make yourself at home!

Hugs,
JT
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Old 07-04-2004, 09:03 PM
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Welcome. We have all been where you are. Some have found a way to stay and some have found a way to leave. This place and Alanon can help you find what is right for you. We are all a big help to each other. Glad you found us.

Hugs, Jo
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Old 07-05-2004, 08:55 AM
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jrh.....HEY!! Glad that you are here!! We all have shared similar experiences and we are all finding our path to LIVE LIFE!! You can have serenity in you life too. Check out the power posts and keep posting!!! Constant
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