LoveMeNow

OMG, I remember hearing that 2 years ago, then he called his own mother. Lol. Last year, while faking his recovery, he treated me awful too. I was heartbroken because I didn't know he was faking....just yet. That should of been a huge red flag for me but I was still "hopeful" and blinded.

This year, I got a text saying "thank you for always being a great mother." I ignored it. I don't need or want his validation. His opinion of me means nothing. In fact, I had to wonder what he really wants. After all, it always about him.

I am also glad to be out of the insanity.

Fandy

don't get sucked in by his 1/2way "apology", the sooner you stop expecting him to be human and speak with respect to you, the better off you will be. it's time to put EmmyG FIRST, him and his "apology" can get to the back of the line.

Your sons need one good parent to show them how women should be treated...and it is NOT their father unfortunately.

EmmyG

Yes. I am home with them, just the three of us. Cooking them spaghetti and having a nice evening.

Mango blast

Now that sounds like a nice Mother's Day! Happy Mother's Day, Emmy.

HopefulinFLA

Emmy, he just doesn't deserve you! None of this is your fault, and you are NOT pathetic. He selfish, self absorbed, and inconsiderate at best.

By all means, please start putting yourself first. I promise, you will begin to feel much much better when you do. It's a terrible feeling to make sacrifices for someone who doesn't appreciate them and can't reciprocate.

I hope you're enjoying your Mother's Day evening with your boys.

Hugs!

missboots

I'm joining in with nearly all of the sentiments above: I understand what you're going through and I'm so sorry for your pain, Emmy. I've been there. I don't remember last Mother's Day (was pregnant so it counts lol) so he must have not been horrible. But my birthday is a few days away and I do remember him last year finding me someone's house to clean while he did their yard and then grabbing the money I earned out of my hand. No card, no gift. Nada. I made it out two and a half weeks ago and had a beautiful day. Just seems like I see couples in love everywhere! It DOES get better. Heal yourself physically and in your heart and push thoughts of him aside. Honestly, from reading on here I see that my AH is nothing special. Just an abusive addict. But we are unbelievably strong, smart women deserving of love.

Timeforachange1

I understand as I am going through the same also. It's a horrible feeling to feel u appreciated and unloved. Better days ahead take care of yourself and feel better soon.

gettingbetter64

You are not pathetic, he doesn't deserve you. You deserve someone who will respect and value you just as you are. Hurt people hurt people. Take care of yourself and your boys. Feel better

Seren

Oh, Emmy! It really concerns me that you continue to put yourself in this man's hands--knowing how it will turn out. I know you know. You know you know. Please don't believe that he is going to behave in a kind, respectful, honorable way toward you. He has shown you exactly who he is over and over and over again. Unless and until he acknowledges there is a problem and receives the help he needs, this will not change.

unsureoffuture

I know how you fell Emmy! My STBXAH forgot our 10 yr weddinng anniversary. Who forgets that? The A destroys their brains and makes it mush up there. I'm sorry you are feeling down. You deserve to have someone who appreciates you and cherishes all the good things you bring into their life. Plainly speaking, you deserve so much better! Hugs and Happy Mother's Day!

EmmyG

Thanks all of you. Today is my anniversary and I've been listening to love songs all day. But not out of sadness. I had a great night with my boys last night. We cuddled in bed and watched a movie and talked a lot. I'm just thinking about what real love is and that someday I may be in the position to be loved the right way, but for now I just have to keep focusing on my boys because they are what's most important.

CodeJob

Happy Mothers Day Emmy! You deserve happiness. You do.

Stung

Sounds like a good night. I love snuggling up with my two girls and just being silly. I agree that you should put yourself first. When you start taking care of you, everything else will gradually fall into place. Sending hugs, and I hope you're over the nasty flu bug!

Ariel1030

EmmyG, I cannot tell you how many times I have been in your place. My children are small, so I have no choice but to have persevered through many sicknesses at the cost of getting sicker and sicker. My AH gets annoyed when I'm sick or if a family member has died...I'm not sure why they don't comfort and take care especially when we give so much of ourselves. For so long I've taken it personally, I must not be good enough, pretty enough, interesting enough, enough, enough, enough....or why would he reject me when I most need him? Do you feel that way?

From an outside perspective, you sound like a wonderful person who has nothing to do with his actions. I, too, have lived without bday and MD gifts. It hurts. No matter what, it hurts. No matter how long it's gone on, it kills. I went so far as to say "I don't want anything tangible, just love."

I don't think it matters what we do. I am green as grass to this & all these realizations, so all I can do is relate and say you are not alone. Please try to get yourself well - it's tough, though, I know. Pm me if you need a shoulder.