Maudcat

Interesting thread, Syd.
Thank you for checking in.
Sorry for your situation.
My sib is alcohol addicted. He drank from the time he was a teen.
He is soon to be 63, and, well, he's mess, physically and mentally.
I will spare you the details.
I don't know what his insides are like, as he won't go to the doctor, but his outsides are pretty bad.
I am continually amazed that he is still upright.
He lives with my mother, which is probably partly why he hasn't t died yet.
Sadly, drunks can live a long time.
I think my sib's last years are going to be ugly. They're kind of ugly now.
The question becomes, what facility will take an active alcoholic?

dandylion

LeeJane....I think that it is harder on the loved o ne, at this stage, as the alcoholic can numb everything (the fear and the reality) with the alcohol. Whereas, the caretaker (usually) doesn't have this escape and also, has to do the brunt of the work of caretaking.
The alcoholic gets to drink and forget...the caretaker gets the worry and the work.
The impact of all of this, frequently leads to illness for the caretaker, as well.

Sasha1972

I am really sorry to hear that you're facing the prospect of caregiving for a spouse whose body is giving out after years of alcohol use. If he continues drinking and making his medical situation worse, it sounds like it might be time to put some boundaries around what kind of care you are willing to provide for him. I second the suggestion about AlAnon.

LeeJane

I think this is completely correct. It is harder on the caretaker. The drinker is in Oblivion.

Thanks for this, Lee xx