First holiday
First holiday
As it was for several on here, this was my first holiday without my XAH. I have to say, it was peaceful and wonderful. I have had a dread about Easter for several years b/c when he got into much legal trouble it was the evening before Easter, so this holiday in particular has been a trigger for me.
Yesterday my littles and I got up and went to church. XAH was there (he sings in the church band. Don't be fooled, he likes to sing and to have praise for doing a good job, not because of his good Christian faith, that does not exist). He did sing and did a beautiful job. Kids were glad to see him. He sat on one side of the kids, me on the other. I really just ignored him which was also fine. After church they set free butterflies which was really neat.
We then traveled about 30 miles to hang out with my parents, my aunt, and her family. It was so nice not to have to worry about my XAH drinking while I was not looking, or worry how he might act. I did not worry about what time we left or really anything at all. Even though my kidlets are too old to believe in the Easter bunny, we had an egg hunt and a fine time was had with all of us.
I did not miss my XAH. I did not miss the anxiety of him being around. I did not even think about him or his legal issues. For the first time in a very long time, I enjoyed Easter for all the right reasons.
I can only say I hope more holidays are like this. My XAH accuses me of having an affair and crazy stuff. I could not even care less. Quack quack. I am finding happiness and it feels really good!
I hope everyone has a great week full of peace and smiles.
XXX
Yesterday my littles and I got up and went to church. XAH was there (he sings in the church band. Don't be fooled, he likes to sing and to have praise for doing a good job, not because of his good Christian faith, that does not exist). He did sing and did a beautiful job. Kids were glad to see him. He sat on one side of the kids, me on the other. I really just ignored him which was also fine. After church they set free butterflies which was really neat.
We then traveled about 30 miles to hang out with my parents, my aunt, and her family. It was so nice not to have to worry about my XAH drinking while I was not looking, or worry how he might act. I did not worry about what time we left or really anything at all. Even though my kidlets are too old to believe in the Easter bunny, we had an egg hunt and a fine time was had with all of us.
I did not miss my XAH. I did not miss the anxiety of him being around. I did not even think about him or his legal issues. For the first time in a very long time, I enjoyed Easter for all the right reasons.
I can only say I hope more holidays are like this. My XAH accuses me of having an affair and crazy stuff. I could not even care less. Quack quack. I am finding happiness and it feels really good!
I hope everyone has a great week full of peace and smiles.
XXX
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