Mango blast

I met a couple good counselors at family week in rehab. After my experience with the medical community as a whole, it seems ineffective to work with someone who doesn't have a background in addictions and emotional abuse. I'm wondering if that's the case though? How to find a good therapist?

There's a psychiatrist who's highly recommended by my doctor, and I like the methods he uses, but the tone of his voice on his voice mail irritates me. Cost is also a big factor there. I didn't leave a message so I don't know if there are any options for sliding scale or making payments on an account. One part of me says not to incur any more debt. The other part of me recognizes I probably need a professional counselor to guide me in this. What free therapy options are there? How to avoid bad counselors?

I have an Alanon meeting tomorrow. Maybe that will be enough for now, to go regularly, not miss meetings and find one-on-one counseling later when I can afford it.

I'm feeling lost. I want to excuse it as being physical, which I'm working on, but there's that tie-in between the mind body and spirit. The biggest disconnect now seems like it's between the mind and body. Maybe tomorrow or even later today I'll be doing a lot better, but I've been thinking that all week. I'm really really tired of all these lost times where I feel like I'm going backwards.

My husband is working his recovery, the emotional abuse is gone and I've learned a lot about that. I'm having a hard time taking care of me and putting myself first before a zillion other things in life.

miamifella

I am also suspicious of the medical community, so I have always gone to clinical psychologists instead, only seeing psychiatrists for medication. Psychiatrists usually have less training in talk therapy than psychologists.

Why not ask the rehab if they can recommend someone in your area or even your doctor? (He must know more than one person who deals with mental health.)

Mango blast

I looked up the doctor that was recommended and he's a licensed Clinical Psychologist. I was wrong about him being a psychiatrist. I'm new to this.

Looking over information and links on his site, he seems like the logical choice but I'm still hesitant for some reason. Our doctor is cautious about any referrals but she highly recommended him. The rehab is a long ways away and didn't have any referrals in our area.

miamifella

One or two visits to see if it clicks cannot hurt. If you still do not like him, do not go back. He might even be able to suggest someone who would help you more.

Usually therapists do have a sliding scale. And if he does not, ask him to suggest someone who does.

embraced2000

al-anon was my "counselor" so to speak. I couldn't really afford other mental health options. I did go for a few months counseling on several occasions.

al-anon was great for me. led to other opportunities for mental health venues.

Seren

When I went through counseling during my divorce, I saw about 3 or 4 therapists for one session and then chose the one with whom I was most comfortable.

DesertEyes

I went to lots of al-anon meetings and asked who _they_ has as their therapist. About half the peeps at every meeting gave me a referal. Several of the people _were_ therapists, so I ended up with a huge list.

Most of them will do a first session for free. _After_ that first freebie I would go sit at one of my "sanity hideouts" at the beach and ask myself if I felt _better_ after the freebie, or not. From the therapists that helped me feel better I chose one, and he turned out to be great for me.

Mike

9111111

Hey, great to see you taking care of yourself and a really good question you got there. I'm sure this thread will be helpful to others as well

Totally agree with what the others have said. Also since you mentioned emotional abuse it might make sense to check in with your local women shelter or domestic abuse / women advocacy groups. In some areas they offer free / sliding scale one-on-one or group counseling, and also make referals to therapists in the your area.

I don't know if you have children - I have none myself, but there are lots of great parents here who I'm sure can offer tons of great advice.

lillamy

I would look for someone who specializes in treating alcoholic families.
And then I would call and see if they will talk to you on the phone first, tell your story in a brief version, and see how they react and whether they think they will be able to help you.

That's how I found our current counselor -- the practice she runs has different therapists specializing in different areas, and the owner does an initial phone consult with each new client to put them with the "right" counselor. My daughter sees a counselor who was married to an abusive alcoholic. She doesn't have specialized training in addiction issues, but her own experiences are enough.

Mountainmanbob

the wife and I have found some good counseling at a local church and they also had addiction specialist there