choublak

It's not about making each other happy, or any other kind of imagined perfection. It's about helping the person in front of you be everything they truly are.

Here are some ways to do that.

Hold each other accountable.
Understand the gift she is here to give this world.

Call bs.
Reflect when she isn't giving it.

Let go.
Trust in his separate journey, even when what he's doing makes zero sense to you.

Remember that your job is not to make your partner happy.
It's to allow her the space to find her own happiness--when you're together, and when you're apart.

Be honest.
One hundred percent. The permission you give yourself to be all of who you are is what creates that space.

Fight well.
You're both on the same team. Your opposition is the misunderstanding--not each other.

Embrace attraction to others.
It's there. Communicate, be clear (with everyone, including yourself), and enjoy your fabulous human existence.

Do your work.
It's usually not about him, or her. Your partner is a flashlight illuminating where you've still got work to do. Those feelings of jealousy, resentment and hurt? They're showing you all the places in you that need your own healing.

From elephantjournal.com

honeypig

choublak, I really like this and am going to save it for future reference. There's some stuff here that's really important for me.

Hammer

So what do you figure . . . this would last about 10 seconds with an A, or what?

choublak

Not with an A, but moving forward and forming new relationships. This is how a healthy relationship should be.

Hammer

Makes sense.

So one could reverse figure that if little of this list is or even could be true . . . that probably things are probably not so healthy.