almost had a meltdown last night.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Silicon Valley, CA
Posts: 2,066
Ah! I'm so thankful for your post!!! Yesterday I took the family dog back from RAH, since he's had her the last two months and then I started to worry if maybe he felt lonely without our dog and if that loneliness would drive him to relapse. Whatever the equivalent of drying out an alcoholic brain is, my Codie brain is starting to slowly melt away too.
I think you're doing amazing RB!! I wouldn't share it with him because I don't really see the positive impact for him. But hopefully you feel better after talking it out here.
I think you're doing amazing RB!! I wouldn't share it with him because I don't really see the positive impact for him. But hopefully you feel better after talking it out here.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 1,778
Originally Posted by FireSprite 
I think having the awareness that this is more YOUR issue/trigger is pretty awesome, readerbaby.
An exercise that helped me during these panicky freakouts was to step outside of myself for just a moment mentally & ask, "What do I KNOW to be true here?" And just examine FACTS.
Do I know ~for sure~ he is at work? No. But do I know ~for sure~ that he is lying/somewhere else? No. At that moment I can see how I have the ability to control MY reaction.... I know the same amount of information, 50/50 in either direction & it's up to ME to decide which emotion I want to give more attention to.
So then, focus on my gut. Is that "spidey sense" tingling happening only when I am mentally focusing on the negative possibilities? (and therefore, a REaction) Or does it exist, on it's own, not being influenced by my thoughts? (an Emotional Action/Thought from my gut-brain, a true BatSignal that something is "Off"?) If it IS my gut speaking to me, then waiting for "more to be revealed" is all I CAN do.
Even when the mental exercise doesn't go quite as linear than that (I often chase a few circles in my head first) it still helps me to calm myself & recognize the limits of what I can control. HTH!
An exercise that helped me during these panicky freakouts was to step outside of myself for just a moment mentally & ask, "What do I KNOW to be true here?" And just examine FACTS.
Do I know ~for sure~ he is at work? No. But do I know ~for sure~ that he is lying/somewhere else? No. At that moment I can see how I have the ability to control MY reaction.... I know the same amount of information, 50/50 in either direction & it's up to ME to decide which emotion I want to give more attention to.
So then, focus on my gut. Is that "spidey sense" tingling happening only when I am mentally focusing on the negative possibilities? (and therefore, a REaction) Or does it exist, on it's own, not being influenced by my thoughts? (an Emotional Action/Thought from my gut-brain, a true BatSignal that something is "Off"?) If it IS my gut speaking to me, then waiting for "more to be revealed" is all I CAN do.
Even when the mental exercise doesn't go quite as linear than that (I often chase a few circles in my head first) it still helps me to calm myself & recognize the limits of what I can control. HTH!
LOL
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: nh
Posts: 339
Ha...sad thought... Practice makes perfect...and unfortunately we prob wint run out of opportunities to practice for a while! But maybe I could even look at that as a positive? Good luck! Your not alone in this struggle!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
