Help is out there? But where??

Old 06-21-2004, 10:06 AM
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Help is out there? But where??

Hi,

I am so lost (in more ways than one) Where do you begin to go for help? I said in an earlier post I went to an Al Anon meeting and how great it was for me. BUT it was at a motorcycle club camp out so it was a "planned" meeting, I have been with my friend to AA meetings when Al Anon was "supposed" to meet, but nobody showed up for the meeting?? NOW...I KNOW help is here, but I am not finding it as easy as I think I should.....they say "keep coming back it works" well where does one go??
Also, I find a lot of myself in a lot of these posts...but I seem to get lost here, as I have said I feel I am reaching for a life support and right when I get there, someone yanks it away....someone seems to start a thread, you reply, and if you ask a question, its ignored....maybe I am not seeing things clearly, but I dont find this "user friendly" either....my biggest question is.....help..what is it..and where do you get it? I'm having a hard time seeing that this thing "works"...
Sue
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Old 06-21-2004, 10:17 AM
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Help is within.
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Old 06-21-2004, 10:24 AM
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and how to you begin to dig within? HOW do you begin a healing process when you dont know? I'm being completly serious....I dont know what to do.how to do it...or where to do it??
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Old 06-21-2004, 10:31 AM
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Sturpin,
I found Al-anon meet places and times for all meetings within 20 miles on the internet. They also have listings at my local library. Try that to get yourself to some meetings.

At Al-anon they have some very helpful liturature and books that can get you started. The wonderful folks there give you phone numbers to call when you are feeling stressed or need to talk to someone.

I am pretty new to this myself, about 6 weeks. I can feel a slight change. At least I'm not a complete crazy all day like I was. Try Al-anon, it will help you!
Also go to the library and check on some books for codependants. Those types of books assist you with letting go and looking to yourself for happiness.

Get started and good luck. I'll watch for your posts if I can give any more suggestions I will.
Alexia
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Old 06-21-2004, 10:45 AM
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Listen to Alexia, she's a baby too, and she's looking inside to find herself.
And really, that's all you can do.

I remember when I was first getting sober, it seemed like everyone had an answer to why they got sober, but no one could tell me it either. Just vague things, like one day at a time, and work on yourself... work the program.

and that's hard when you can't find someone to actually talk this over with. That's what sponsors are for. Find a like-minded individual who's hell was similar to yours. Find how they succeeded in escaping, but don't leave thinking that you can't find the answers. Sometimes, when peaple tell you to look into yourself, they have good intentions. Because we know that most times, when we're in it, we don't want to look inside, because what we see isn't pretty. But that's what the inventory is for. So we can see how for down the alcohol road we've sunk and hopefully by seeing ourselve, we begin to dig ourselves out.

I don't have any answers either sturpin. I just know that if you stay with sobriety and with people that have been where you are, it will get better. If not the situation, at least your peace of mind. Cause no one gets through this alone. We are stronger because we survived it, and we are better because of it!

Remember that. :bunny1:
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Old 06-21-2004, 11:07 AM
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Alexia and Lost Dream,

Thanks. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart, I am sincere in not knowing where to start NOW I am....its like a gun without ammuntion, if you dont know where to buy any, it does you no good.. NOW I can at least begin.....not to sound too ignorant, but did you do a search engine for Al Anon? Thats how I found this group.....I know I have to look inside myself, not sure if I "want to" but I know in order to heal, I have to begin there, hopefully will have someone with me to help me through that step.
Again, I cant begin to tell you how much your replies meant, THANK YOU
Sue
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Old 06-21-2004, 11:34 AM
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there is an 800 number to alanon worldwide in the US. it will help you to find the closest alanon meeting to where you live. and if you are like me and in a rural area... ask for areas that arent as close but maybe the need for the meeting is worth the drive.

as for getting started. heck you already did the hard part. you admitted you need help and are willing to work for it. your HP helps if you let it into your life.

buy one of the books of approved literature to read. meetings here are once a week, but 7 days a week i have access to words of encouragement, help, love, and support. along with this site and the online meetings they hold here.

after a few meetings find a sponsor. someone you can trust. and they will along with your alanon group help you to find this road of recovery.

people here dont intentionally not answer questions. most questions people ask in this forum really have no answers. many come to alanon hoping to find "THE" answer. why does my A love booze more than me? and how can i make them well?

after a while in the program you realize, we are here to heal ourselves. we cannot control, or cure our A. we can cure ourselves. and that alone is a huge task. so your frustration at not getting answers is in no way trying to be rude. but living by the alanon structure. we dont give advice, we offer support, help, understanding and our own insights.. and with your own strength and that of your HP. you find the answers for yourself.

remember in school when someone would give you an answer to a test? usually didnt teach you anything. it is thru learning that we grow. and we grow together in alanon. for we are a family of people not related thru blood, but by a bond much stronger. a desire to become the best people we can be

good luck
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Old 06-21-2004, 11:34 AM
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Keeping posting and reading here. Read the power posts at the top of this form and the NarAnon form. Look in the phonebook for AlAnon.
Here's the official website http://www.al-anon-alateen.org/
Mostly when you are told the 'answers are within' is that when you learn to trust yourself and be yourself and see where you want to go with your life, you see what you need to heal thus starting the process. The more knowledge you aquire the better to make good choices for yourself.
The one nice thing about here is you are never alone.
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Old 06-21-2004, 02:04 PM
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If we read every post here for a few days, we begin to see things that help.
HUGS Best Wishes, Clancy46
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