worriedmind

My sister helped break the ice and to make a long story short, I'm moving in my my dad. I talked to the landlord today and I need my BF to sign a form that gets me off the lease. I'll pay my half for the next 2 months and then be done. I just hope he signs the form. I wasn't going to say anything until tomrrow after work bu he called and I answered because I ignored 3 calls from him yesterday. He could tell something was up so I told him I'm moving out.

As usual, he begged for one more chance. I said no, and told him that I've heard that many times before. He always says that he didn't mean it then, but he does now. I don't know how many times this has happened. I told him that I care about him, but I can't be around this situation any longer, and I need to be away from it.

I'm going to get the form from the lanlord tomorrow and hope he signs it. I might have to grab a few things and drive back to my dad's. I don't see it being a very good idea to stay the night.

I'm still anxious and all wound up but I feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I am no longer dealing with this on my own with only my best friend and sister knowing the situation. It's out in the open.

I put a note under my dad's door late last night thanking him, and apologising for burdening him. He and my stepmom just got my step brother out and finally have the house to themselves, and now here I am. I also asked him to stop me if I try and go back on this decision. It's time.

Pia

It sounds like you have been through a lot. Enough for you to realize you needed to go.

I am so happy you are leaving the situation and take care of you sending hugs!!

worriedmind

Thanks. My sister left this afternoon. I'm starting to get really sad.

spiderqueen

Hi worriedmind;
I'm sorry you're sad - this is not easy, especially when they are making promises. I haven't read your whole story, but try to remember that if he actually gets it together, embraces recovery, you *could* try again some day. But it is OK to be done spinning around on the merry-go-round. My experience is that it's darn near impossible to take care of myself in their vortex. You can care and love from a safe and sane distance.

((hugs))

FeelingGreat

Hi worried, I'm sorry you have to go through this bad period to get to the good stuff, but in the long run it's the only thing you can do.
Is there a danger of you keeping up contact with the ABF and getting sucked back in? It might be worth thinking about how you're going to handle future contact, or non-contact.

Pia

worriedmind - I know it's hard but better now than 5,10,15 + years from now and dealing with a divorce, more broken promises, lies and children.
If you are sad now think how much worse it would of been down the road.
Just think there are to many men on this planet why bother with this one that will only disappoint you and hurt you over and over again.

hopeful4

Good for you! I hope this is a peaceful move for you!

worriedmind

Thanks everyone. I'm up and down and all over the place. Work is crazy and I feel like I'm going to fail my class. I told the 2 girls I'm taking it with, and one had alcoholic parents and would spend weeks alone when they were in jail, and the other has an alcoholic ex and is starting over with school @ 41. I have a lot of support, more than many on here, but it's still so hard! If I hated him, it would be easier but I don't. I low him so much and wish it would have turned out differently.

BoxinRotz

I love my husband so I know how you feel. But you and I and the rest of us do not have to be miserable while they are in limbo getting it on with a bottle and HEY... whatever happens, happens and I'm sorry... I don't remember and it'll never happen again til I get the next bottle. Believe me... I can't tell you how many times I've heard my husband say, This bottle was suppose to be different! LMAO How the eff is it suppose to be different?! You standing on your head pouring it in your nostrils? Whut?!

Stop the cycle for yourself because he won't. Nothing wrong with you getting off the merry go round. Go find a swing and soar high on it ALONE! You will feel much better as time goes on and you see how peaceful life can be without all that alcoholic drama.

BodkinVanHorn

I'm sending you hugs, worriedmind.
It feels hard to separate from someone you love.
You are doing the right thing.
You know how sometimes we do things for others? Helping a friend move or babysitting for someone, or helping kids with homework? Good stuff, right? You're doing good stuff for yourself right now!! You rock!