Questions for the Gurus?
Engineer Things; LOVE People
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,707
Questions for the Gurus?
Tonight. I am "chairing" the Alanon Meeting of MY VERY BEST Alananny Angel Group.
It is in a Re-Claimed VFW Bar, on the beat up side of town, not too far from the liquor stores and breast-taverns.
God and the Angels have a Stronghold, there.
Most of the Group is in or near their 70's. My Sponsor. 78, with 34 years in. The lead Grand Dame -- in her 80's. Helped start the South Dallas Group decades ago -- where I first hit Alanon 4 years ago. Now she is out in East Texas. A 70 something retired 1st grade teacher. So wise -- "I will explain this so you (me) can understand, Mr. College Boy." And she does -- just like she is talking to a 1st grader -- me.
This the meeting where the Plumber took me down to my knees and essentially called me a stupid, arrogant, dumbass for being in a Step Program for 4 years and having never worked the Steps. Thank you, Thank you, Plumber. Hard saying that as an Electrical Guy.
Even the youngest is a Wonder. In her 30's, fully done the Steps. She talks like an East Texas Forrest Gump but is every bit as wise. She just pushes, pushes, pushes. "[Hammer] I need you to chair a meeting. You gonna be here [date?]. Well I am putting you down on the list." Just no stopping her. She "made" me chair my first meeting probably six months ago. I am sooooo Thankful to her for that.
This was the group that I started the survey from for what it takes for a family to "make it," through this stuff -- BOTH sides fully BOTH working THEIR OWN program. That is THE path to success. So much wisdom in one room.
So tonight is MY Night again. They run the meeting at least half cross-talk, but totally polite, well-ordered, and there to save those who will be saved. I get to pick the topic.
My question to you . . . anything you would like to ask these Angels?
I will just carry the questions and messages back.
It is in a Re-Claimed VFW Bar, on the beat up side of town, not too far from the liquor stores and breast-taverns.
God and the Angels have a Stronghold, there.
Most of the Group is in or near their 70's. My Sponsor. 78, with 34 years in. The lead Grand Dame -- in her 80's. Helped start the South Dallas Group decades ago -- where I first hit Alanon 4 years ago. Now she is out in East Texas. A 70 something retired 1st grade teacher. So wise -- "I will explain this so you (me) can understand, Mr. College Boy." And she does -- just like she is talking to a 1st grader -- me.
This the meeting where the Plumber took me down to my knees and essentially called me a stupid, arrogant, dumbass for being in a Step Program for 4 years and having never worked the Steps. Thank you, Thank you, Plumber. Hard saying that as an Electrical Guy.
Even the youngest is a Wonder. In her 30's, fully done the Steps. She talks like an East Texas Forrest Gump but is every bit as wise. She just pushes, pushes, pushes. "[Hammer] I need you to chair a meeting. You gonna be here [date?]. Well I am putting you down on the list." Just no stopping her. She "made" me chair my first meeting probably six months ago. I am sooooo Thankful to her for that.
This was the group that I started the survey from for what it takes for a family to "make it," through this stuff -- BOTH sides fully BOTH working THEIR OWN program. That is THE path to success. So much wisdom in one room.
So tonight is MY Night again. They run the meeting at least half cross-talk, but totally polite, well-ordered, and there to save those who will be saved. I get to pick the topic.
My question to you . . . anything you would like to ask these Angels?
I will just carry the questions and messages back.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: right here, right now
Posts: 6,516
Well, what I would like to ask is:
"How long will it take me to get out of the desert and feel like a fully functioning human being again?" but I know that's silly because nobody can answer that question. Because it depends on how much you put into working the program. And all that jazz.
"How long will it take me to get out of the desert and feel like a fully functioning human being again?" but I know that's silly because nobody can answer that question. Because it depends on how much you put into working the program. And all that jazz.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 6,780
Do they have any regrets about the way they have worked their programs, or something they would go back & change with hindsight?
(I don't mean any specific mistakes; I ask with the understanding that taking missteps, falling down/picking yourself back up again IS part of working a healthy program.... I mean more like fundamental changes they would make in the way they approached recovery.)
(I don't mean any specific mistakes; I ask with the understanding that taking missteps, falling down/picking yourself back up again IS part of working a healthy program.... I mean more like fundamental changes they would make in the way they approached recovery.)
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 1,038
The question I've been wrestling with today, because it's in my interrogatories for the divorce and I haven't thought this one thoroughly through, is:
How has xah's drinking problem affected your children?
Most of my response thus far has to do with his emotional unavailability, the precariousness of the situation he puts them in (drunk driving, financial crisis, extreme sports without following safety guidelines...)
But I don't know what they can't tell me. DD13 says she has trust issues, DS16 wants to study martial arts to protect us/beat up his father, DD7 is extremely adverse to conflict, and DS10 says dad isn't like he used to be.
What might I be missing?
Thank you!
How has xah's drinking problem affected your children?
Most of my response thus far has to do with his emotional unavailability, the precariousness of the situation he puts them in (drunk driving, financial crisis, extreme sports without following safety guidelines...)
But I don't know what they can't tell me. DD13 says she has trust issues, DS16 wants to study martial arts to protect us/beat up his father, DD7 is extremely adverse to conflict, and DS10 says dad isn't like he used to be.
What might I be missing?
Thank you!
Engineer Things; LOVE People
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,707
Originally Posted by steelman1649 
Bad joke as you indicated the number of blue hairs in your group.
ahhhh. hahaha.
Early Bird, 4 pm Lubys or Furrs cafe deals.
Figure I will read these to them.
They will likely reserve a special place in Hell for the mockers.
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