rry1177

ABF just finished a tech school program. However he has started drinking hard liquor in secret again. He usually drinks beer. I wondered if he's worried about getting a job. I've promised myself and I'm promising you all that I am not going to hound him about the job hunt, I'm not commenting on his sneakin drinkin, and I'm not going to ask him to fix things around the house more than once. He has lots of free time because he only works about 24 hrs per week. I came home from my full time and he was sleep at 5pm. It's sad and I hate it has to end, but I know him and he's not gonna come through for us. I'm done fussing, begging, pleading, bargaining, covering for him. Somebody on SR told me that I'd know when it's time. I understand now because you get toa point where you don't give a damn because you've heard it all. A guy friend looked at me like I had three heads when I told him a piece of my story. This relationship isn't healthy and i forgot that it wasn't. I don't feel stupid anymore. Im not as ashamed as I used to be. Wish me luck.

hopeful4

I do wish you luck. Do not be ashamed, you did not do anything to be ashamed of! When detatchment does happen, it happens quickly, I totally agree. It is just like a switch someone hits.

We are here and we will continue to support you always!

Hugs!

Stung

Good luck! I'm happy you're sticking up for yourself and sticking to your boundaries. Proud of you!!

Bernadette

Good luck! Let go or be dragged!! I sense some fresh air and serenity in your near future!
Peace-
B

NoelleR

"...he has started drinking hard liquor in secret again. He usually drinks beer...."

Plz don't fall into the "it's only beer" argument; it's false. Just as a clarification; there's approximately the same amount of alcohol in a 12 oz beer, a 5 oz glass of wine, and a mixed drink with 1.5 oz of 80 proof liquor................here's the math..............:

12 oz beer........approx. 5% alcohol..............................12x.05=.6 oz alcohol
5 oz glass of wine..........approx. 12% alcohol..................5x.12=.6 oz alcohol
mixed drink [1.5 oz of 80 proof (40% alcohol)]...............1.5x.4=.6 oz alcohol

(o:
NoelleR

FeelingGreat

Hi, have you made any plans about how you will carry out your separation? Will he move or will you? Are you anticipating any trouble?
Best wishes - once you make up your mind a lot of things become easier.

rry1177

Noelle I hate to admit I fool myself about the beer.

Feeling great _he would have to leave. He's got lots of friends who would let him crash for a few days. I've broken up with him twice. He always wants me back. He drinks during the day and is too comfortable. I don't think he'd put up a fight cuz I have 5 brothers.

It's too late even with the progress he made with school. I'm resentful and I'm starting to get an attitude over stupid things. I never see him looking for a job. If I asked (which I'm not), he'd say he was looking while i was at work. Full of baloney.

Hammer

Alanon teaches something about wrapping them up in a blanket, and handing them over to God.

I do not tend to be so dignified in my prayer life . . .

More like -- "Hey God, THIS one has a poopy diaper, you want her back?"

And then get ready to give him the boot to God.

Then drop kick him out straight to God.

DROP KICK ME JESUS by BOBBY BARE - YouTube