Gracey

Since I cant seem to trust myself, I need someone’s advice………Of course everyone knows that it is Father’s Day this Sunday My A Husband always calls me at 9:30am on his break….something I have grown to like most of the time…….He preceded to tell me what he is going to do this weekend…….his mom needs her gutters cleaned out and also wants some electrical stuff done……..so he informs me that is what he is going to do one day this weekend…..I said cool….since you are going to do that I will take advantage of that and go see my dad for Father’s day………..he became silent…….I know he doesn’t want me to go………he asked me why do I make plans for every weekend……..I said I don’t……I did go last weekend to see my mother and father…….but that was the first time I had gone in a couple of months…….I told him how lucky he was that his mom just lives three miles from him and he can see her and talk to her everyday……….

Do you know what my mind was saying…………how dare you tell me that you are going to spend one of the days on the weekend with your mom and tell me that you don’t want me to go see my dad……….your mom wants you to go over there so she can spoil you because it is Fathers’ Day weekend and probably wants to take you out……..and I am sure has a gift for you…….Unlike Mother’s day I didn’t get ****………not only did I not get **** for Mother’s day, I just had my birthday June 10th and didn’t even get a frickin card…….His mom never once has recognized my birthday and she knows that my parents are two hours away…….not even a card from her……His birthday is June 26th and I don’t have the heart to purposely forget him……..

So…..

1. I am jealous that my husband has someone other then myself to not forget special days for him and spoil him on those days…….

2. As old as I am, I feel like these days that are special for me are forgotten by everyone…..

3. I always make sure my kids never go without on any Holiday……..I also make sure even if I cant afford a lot for my husband, there is always a little surprise for him……….and always a card……

I am drowning in self pitty again aren’t I…….

Gabe

It sounds like your feelings are hurt that you aren't getting back what you give out. I have dabbled in that myself from time to time.
All I can tell you is that I have learned to feel good about what I do.
Whether or not I get as good as I give isn't as important to me as it used to be.
Do I like when people do nice things for me? You bet.
But I don't crumble when it doesn't happen.

Gracey

I know I should be happy for my husband, instead of thinking poor, poor me.........he always told me I ruin everything for him..........something as simple as going to help his mom I have a problem with it.............he is right........I need to let go of all this anger and hurt i have..I need to stop looking to him to make up for all the years of rejection and hurt I have felt........

Magichappens

If I do something for someone, and I don't tell them I expect something in return, I will probably be dissappointed. If you do holidays because you want something in return, you probably need to communicate that.
I quit celebrating holidays a while back. I figure if it's not special today, why should it be special because it's a holiday? I understand that people put importance on certain days, but I don't. I haven't celebrated a birthday or anniversary for years. When I have an opportunity to have fun and get away, I celebrate those times. There are people who are probably not happy with this choice. They expect me to do something for them on a date that they deem important. I refuse to make myself crazy because of a date. I try to let people know how I feel about them without waiting for a date. I celebrate each day for what it offers.That's enough for me. Today I choose to celebrate that I have a job, and my health, my husband, my home, my relationship with God. There are a lot of things that I can celebrate now. I don't need a card or presents. I have a lot to be grateful for. Hugs, Magic