Having one of those days

Old 12-04-2013, 02:02 PM
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Having one of those days

I am wanting to go over and see XAB but trying to stay strong. I made it through yesterday not going to see him. Instead I went to an al-anon meeting and have been reading and responding to posts on SR. I am now listening to music and trying to stay busy. I know in the past I would have called him by now and initiated the contact. Patting myself on the back for not initiating contact this time. Mixed feelings of wishing he would call and being relieved he hasn't called. I just read the new contact =new pain and am trying hard to keep that in mind.
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Old 12-04-2013, 04:52 PM
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Good on ya, Suncatcher!!! It's hard to break those habits, but healthy to do so. Big hugs!
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Old 12-04-2013, 07:06 PM
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Right after I posted that he called! I went to pick him up and hes here now lol but I am keeping my guard up!
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Old 12-05-2013, 01:35 PM
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If you're trying to avoid contact, why do you go pick him up as soon as he calls?
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Old 12-05-2013, 02:52 PM
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I was feeling lonely I guess. I still care about him and think if him as a good friend. As long as I don't get too attached and start letting him affect me emotionally again I will be able to handle it. At least that is what I am hoping.
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Old 12-05-2013, 02:55 PM
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I hope this works out for you, suncatcher. Personally I've never had much luck controlling my emotions with recent exes, A or no.
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Old 12-05-2013, 05:24 PM
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We become addicted to the A, just like they're addicted to alcohol. If you're truly wanting to avoid or limit contact, then you have to work as hard as he needs to work on sobriety. As long as you do the back and forth, you won't be able to fully heal. You can care about him without remaining enmeshed. Just a thought.
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