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Old 11-29-2013, 07:37 AM
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Step meeting

Tomorrow is week four of my al anon meeting,they said last week it will be STEP meeting,step 11,what can I expect,never been to step meeting,and thinking of giving it a miss,i am not feeling 100% ,pounding headache,sore throat,no sleep.
But I KNOW I cannot make one next week,as we are putting up Christmas tree then,and its a family tradition that we all do it together
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Old 11-29-2013, 07:52 AM
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Step meetings are not that big of deal, unless one makes it so. Folks talk about the Step, what it means in their life, read some of the related literature. All Good.

But some Step 11 meetings I have done . . . dunno for you . . . but I would expect HP/God to show up Large.

Step 11 is Very Powerful Stuff.

Very Powerful Stuff.

Try that prayer. Could change your life.

Will do my story on that later some time -- really crazy wild -- wound up with a house (from homeless), AND Mrs. Hammer in Rehab, AND Some Real Learning from that prayer. Falling like dominoes.

So yeah. Go. Quit even guessing. Just Go.
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Old 11-29-2013, 08:00 AM
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Originally Posted by Hammer View Post
Step meetings are not that big of deal, unless one makes it so. Folks talk about the Step, what it means in their life, read some of the related literature. All Good.

But some Step 11 meetings I have done . . . dunno for you . . . but I would expect HP/God to show up Large.

Step 11 is Very Powerful Stuff.

Very Powerful Stuff.

Try that prayer. Could change your life.

Will do my story on that later some time -- really crazy wild -- wound up with a house (from homeless), AND Mrs. Hammer in Rehab, AND Some Real Learning from that prayer. Falling like dominoes.

So yeah. Go. Quit even guessing. Just Go.
Do they do ONE step a month?if so would I not be better off to start step meetings in January,and start at step one,or is it ok to pop in at number 11.
I know what its like to be homeless,but my situation had nothing to do with alcohol,and was 20 years ago.I struggled to set up and keep a nice home,which prob makes me more angry with ex,that shattered that peace.
My home is def.my haven.
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Old 11-29-2013, 08:37 AM
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The homeless thing was Mrs. Hammer going nutz.

We had to move for a school change, and Mrs. Hammer went nutz, refused to pick a house and instead "had an episode" where she insisted we pack everything in a storage unit, and allowed the kids one small box each and moved us all to her Mom's house.

That was finally it for me. I started back into Alanon with a real purpose at that point. I do not allow that level of crazy any longer, and picked the house, moved us, got the kids in school and the rest. She kept spiraling down and wound up in Rehab, but like I say that is a whole longer story.

Back to the meeting. No need to duck it . . . . unless you really do not want to go.

Unless you really do not want to go.

Unless you really do not want to go.

There are no bad meetings.
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Old 11-29-2013, 08:56 AM
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Originally Posted by Hammer View Post
The homeless thing was Mrs. Hammer going nutz.

We had to move for a school change, and Mrs. Hammer went nutz, refused to pick a house and instead "had an episode" where she insisted we pack everything in a storage unit, and allowed the kids one small box each and moved us all to her Mom's house.

That was finally it for me. I started back into Alanon with a real purpose at that point. I do not allow that level of crazy any longer, and picked the house, moved us, got the kids in school and the rest. She kept spiraling down and wound up in Rehab, but like I say that is a whole longer story.

Back to the meeting. No need to duck it . . . . unless you really do not want to go.

Unless you really do not want to go.

Unless you really do not want to go.

There are no bad meetings.
Thanks Hammer....looks like I am going...
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Old 11-29-2013, 10:32 AM
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There are no bad meetings.
That. ^

I found that going to step meetings for steps I hadn't "gotten to" yet was very helpful, because it made me relax about "working the steps"… as a control freak codie, my biggest challenge working the steps was obsessing about whether I was doing them right (I probably drove up my sponsor's consumption of Xanax…).

Going to step meetings for steps 8,9,11 when I was stuck on Step 1 was awesome, because it made me realize that there was no right way to do it and that, much like raising children (my sponsor's comparison), you build your abilities and skills and understanding and grow in the process.

So the only caution I would throw out there is that when you go to the meeting, do not let yourself be intimidated by Step 11 and think "Oh I will never be able to do that" because you will, when you get there.
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Old 11-29-2013, 11:27 AM
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Getthere, my first meeting was actually a step 11 meeting. It was an ACOA meeting because that was the only Al-Anon meeting in my area on that day and that was the day I finally worked up the courage to go (plus ACOA applies to me since my father is an alcoholic.)

It was a good experience. I admit that I was a little freaked out at the time but I found a few things that really resonated with me. After reflecting on the experience days later, I realized that there was actually quit a lot that I found helpful. One individual who spoke had lived in a buddhist temple for a while. I think his share was my favorite. (I'm christian if that matters.)

Prayer & I are old friends but meditation is something I've never been able to do. I just can't get my mind quiet that long. Listening to everyone talk, I realized that I really want that. I'm ready to work through the steps, now I just have to find a sponsor.

I'm glad you decided to go. I don't think you'll regret it!
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Old 11-29-2013, 11:30 AM
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Originally Posted by JustAGirl1971 View Post
Getthere, my first meeting was actually a step 11 meeting. It was an ACOA meeting because that was the only Al-Anon meeting in my area on that day and that was the day I finally worked up the courage to go (plus ACOA applies to me since my father is an alcoholic.)

It was a good experience. I admit that I was a little freaked out at the time but I found a few things that really resonated with me. After reflecting on the experience days later, I realized that there was actually quit a lot that I found helpful. One individual who spoke had lived in a buddhist temple for a while. I think his share was my favorite. (I'm christian if that matters.)

Prayer & I are old friends but meditation is something I've never been able to do. I just can't get my mind quiet that long. Listening to everyone talk, I realized that I really want that. I'm ready to work through the steps, now I just have to find a sponsor.

I'm glad you decided to go. I don't think you'll regret it!
Thank you....what is ACOA?
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Old 11-29-2013, 11:50 AM
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Originally Posted by getthere View Post
Thank you....what is ACOA?
Adult Children Of Alcoholics.

There's a forum here for adult children also; you may find it useful to visit at some point. My mother is an untreated ACOA, and it has helped me to have a little insight into her actions. My A is also an ACOA, not an uncommon situation.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...holic-parents/

Alcoholism--it's the disease that keeps on giving....
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Old 11-29-2013, 04:25 PM
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My first step meeting was also a step 11 meeting. Our group does one each month, the first week is always a step meeting. It just means our readings pertain to that particular step, instead of the leader choosing a topic. I actually signed up to lead the step 1 meeting next January. Seemed like a good place to start, since I'm one of the newer members. I love my Alanon group. I look forward to every Tuesday now. Yoga and Alanon. Puts me right for the whole week.
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Old 11-29-2013, 04:55 PM
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Originally Posted by ladyscribbler View Post
My first step meeting was also a step 11 meeting. Our group does one each month, the first week is always a step meeting. It just means our readings pertain to that particular step, instead of the leader choosing a topic. I actually signed up to lead the step 1 meeting next January. Seemed like a good place to start, since I'm one of the newer members. I love my Alanon group. I look forward to every Tuesday now. Yoga and Alanon. Puts me right for the whole week.
When you say the first meeting is always Step,do you mean first meeting of the month?...mine is tomorrow,last day of month...I am in Ireland.
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Old 11-29-2013, 05:12 PM
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Hi get there,
Me too , from Ireland.
Different meetings have different formats - I go to 3 .
Two start the new month with a Step meeting, one has it half way through.
It's the same as any other meeting in our town, just that everyone shares what they have experienced with the particular step - if you just want to go and listen without sharing, that's ok too.
Like others have said, you will pick up something in every meeting..... I haven't done all the steps formally, but really learn so much from the Step meetings.
Feel free to pm me if you have any other questions,
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Old 11-29-2013, 05:32 PM
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Cool

"...There are no bad meetings..."

I had to chuckle when I read this. My recovered friends and I have a saying............:

"If you believe there are no bad meetings, then you haven't been to enough meetings."

This would include AA, NA, Alanon, Naranon, ACOA, etc.

(o:
NoelleR
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Old 11-29-2013, 06:45 PM
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Originally Posted by getthere View Post
When you say the first meeting is always Step,do you mean first meeting of the month?...mine is tomorrow,last day of month...I am in Ireland.
Yes. We do our step meetings the first week each month. Maybe it's an Iowa thing. We tend to be a little backward out here in corn country.
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Old 11-30-2013, 05:14 AM
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Hammer, I respectfully disagree with

"There are no bad meetings. "

I've been to many AA meetings and Al Anon meetings. The vast majority were "good" meetings. A few weren't--and it wasn't just me who thought so, others agreed with me.
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Old 11-30-2013, 07:25 AM
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Let Me Amend (a little) . . . . Maybe the only Bad Meetings (for me) are ones I skip? There is a Men's Meeting locally. Two, actually I think. God would probably do that so I know that it is me skipping/missing/avoiding both.

Been to a fairly bonkers one. It was in a church and not published on the website listing. First time I had walked by and looked at the sign on the door, I mentioned I had never seen it on the website listing. They said they knew that and smiled about it. So I stopped by one night. Like I say, it was a little off, and they sort of were doing their own thing. Figured okay dokey for them . . . not quite my thing . . . good to know the real Alanon Conference Level stuff does serve a purpose of keeping things in line.
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