Gracey

I just called home to talk to my daughter and to see how everything was going at home, being it it there first day of summer vacation I wanted to give them a couple of little chores and go through the rules…….dont answer the door, don’t answer the phone……….and so on……..and she said that when she came out of her room this morning she found a big pile of books and papers that her and her friend through away yesterday after school….they obviously went in the the room where the big screen tv is and the computer and they threw there stuff away in that garbage can, and there wasn’t obviously no bag in it…..but they through away just papers and books……..when my daughter came out of her room this morning she found everything she through away in the garbage yesterday dumped in front of her room this morning….I thought it was kinda weird when I went in the basement this morning to iron my shirt to see that big pile in front of her room……I made a note to myself to call her and ask her to clean it up…so when I called home I had mentioned that to her…….and that is when she told me, her and katelyn through it away yesterday and that my husband must have gotten mad that it was in that part of the basement, so he took it and dumped it out in front of her door……she said she was crying and she asked me why he was so mean to her……….I am at work and I am now crying and I just told her that it wasn’t her fault, that he has the problem and I told her how much I loved her…..in the little bit of time he woke up lastnight, you tell me that he wasn’t in a destructive mode…..changing the code on the garage, dumping a garbage can of papers in front of my daughters room…………We have marriage counseling today, and I really believe that it is not going to do any good either………I am at the end of my rope…..I really believe that……I really believe that things are never going to change………I am giving up all hope on my marriage…..I finally told my mom last night about his affair that he had carried on for 2 months……I have not told her that he was an alcoholic……they really don’t have a clue to that……..

DefofLov

Big hugz to you and your daughter, I am so sorry for you tears and frustrations. I hope things get better for both of you

rivercitybelle

Hmm... it sounds like maybe he is trying to you via the kids. The hard part is to remember you can't change him, you can't control him. You can only change you. It's a bit of a relief when you stop hiding their actions isn't it? I hope the marriage counseling goes well for you.

bookworm

Goof grief, you're really being put to the test aren't you?
Hope the counselling goes OK - does he remember what he does when he's out of it? G often doesn't - the number of times I've seen this vacant look on his face when I tell him about conversations we've had the previous evening...

Hugz to you
Sandra