Feeling sad....
 

I got a text from my xagf today asking again if she could see the kids this weekend while I am at Reserves. I didn't respond. I am trying to stay NC....but it is times like these that are hard. I would let myself have a good cry if I didn't have my 4 kids here. I am just filled with loss as to how she could do the things she has done. I know it will pass....but it makes me short tempered with the kids and I hate being that way.

This usto happen to me quite a bit (getting upset about all of it and being short with my kids). I have found that I count to 10 before I say anything to my kids of seriousness. I think about what I say. If I am being short and grouchy around my kids, I am giving my AH even more power over us. I refuse to let that happen. I want to be the rock for my kids, to be the person they can always come to. If I make them walk on eggshells around me that is not going to happen.

You can do this! Don't let the situation have the power over your relationship w/your children. Keep posting, you are not alone in this!

Yep.

Communication silence.

Sound and light discipline.

Check the map.

Continue to march.

huah.

Thanks. I continue to have those moments...it sucks. Woke to 15 missed calls and several texts. Stupidly returned a text and have gotten a barrage of how evil I am...out to hurt her...etc. it amazes me how they can justify the damage they cause! Oh well....back on the horse...

Good you are holding your ground as these consequences just may bring your exagf to their bottom and to the realization that they need to stop. God Bless!

Good on the returned fire. Else you would not know the enemy is there.

and of course, partly in you.

All things work together for good for those who . . . (now finish that sentence?)

You can never win a war against yourself -- best not to fight it.

Call for close fire support. That is what God and the Angels do.

Does not have to be YOUR fight.

Thank you...and Thank God for a new day.. sunny at that!!!

It's probably part of her denial that she blames you and not her actions for why she can't see the kids. My X is doing the same. Just the other day he told me that I am hindering myself by not having time to work, look for a new place, pack while he is with our son. And yet he plans overtime and community service, probation meetings during his kid-time. If he sees it that way, he doesn't really know why I'm doing this. As far as I'm concerned, HE is hindering ME by not being the kind of parent I can trust to leave our child with while I get some time for myself. Thanks for letting me vent on your thread.

Light ...no thank you for responding. I hate 3am. I have been awake for the last few nites. I hate that my A is sleeping fine and I am hurting. I am debating with myself blocking her and her sister.. knowing it would help yet deep inside nit wanting to accept it is over and we have no reason to communicate anymore. I got a hurtful text from her sister...just saw it when I woke up...and resisted defending myself. It isn't worth it. Have to try to sleep now....Army in the am comes early.

I'm sorry you are hurting and having trouble sleeping.
If it would help your mental health to block hurtful messages, perhaps you should just go ahead, at least now until you get through the acute state.

The priority has to be you and your kids. You shouldn't wake up to a barrage of texts and nasty messages. That would be a downer to anybody even if they were feeling great. Cyberspace needs a boundry too.