helluvagalnva

Things seem to be going alot better for me since I stop taking my anti-depressant medication. I don't seem to be as obsessive and crazy feeling.
I'm finally realizing that I really don't need a man in my life to make me happy or feel complete.
I do miss my husband but not all things about him. I know that I will always love and care about him and his well being but know there is a very large possibility that we will never be a family again and I'm ok with it.

I went out last Friday night for awhile and had the most uplifting conversation with a male friend. He told me that I am a wonderful person and have alot going for me and shouldn't just settle for anyone just to fill the shoes so I won't be lonely. He told me that I have alot of friends that truely love me for the special and loving person that I am. He is right...I have never given myself enough credit. I know that I'm a loving, gentle, and compassionate person and I'm not going to let my addict take that away from me anymore.

I'm going to an Al-anon meeting tomorrow and I'm going to ask for a sponser. I'm really going to work on me, now.

Thanks so much to everyone for your support!! I really do love you guys.

Love,
Galnva

Morning Glory

Galnva,

I'm so glad things are looking up. I find that I slip back sometimes into old patterns, but I can pull myself out much quicker now. You are a wonderful person and you've come a long way even in the short time I've known you.

We are growing together in Ann's little garden.

Hugs,

MG

JT

I am so happy for you! It is so nice to hear good things from someone you know and respect...it makes you feel little lighter on you feet!

bonbon

((((((cindy)))))) I am glad to hear things looking up for you! Sounds like your on the right trak! Keep on keepin on.....

love ya..

helluvagalnva

Thanks everyone for your replies. Every time things start to look up and i'm feeling good about my life something else happens. I swear I think I have this black cloud that follows me around. What's up with that???

Last night my husband told me there is a warrant out for his arrest. Evidently, he was involved in a hit and run with no drivers license in a company vehicle. Real bright huh.... He said " I feel so bad...I don't know what to do" (Quack) What should I do, Cin (Quack, Quack) You know this wouldn't have happened if we were still together (Quack, Quack, Quack) You took care of me and always made me do the right thing. Blah.blah.blah..... He was so sweet and just couldn't understand why all these bad things just keep happening to him...still never excepting responsibility.

I guess he'll be going to jail. No child support or help with the kids. I just never learns. I didn't get upset with him and I didn't say I told you so or yell in any way. He said what should I do - my reply was - you should do what you feel is best. Do the right thing. That was the only advise I offered. I told him that this was something he was going to have to work out on his own. He kept saying how sorry he was (Quack, Quack, Quack) I'm so sick of the same old **** with him...It's never ending. Will he ever learn? I don't think so..

I feel a little disappointed but not obsessing over it. I didn't really have any expectations because I know his past record and it's not too good. So, I guess you guys were right. If you don't have expectations you don't set yourself up to fall.

I'm scared for my kids. I really don't know what's going to happen from here. I guess he's going to turn himself in or run. I let you guys know when I find out.

Love,
Galnva

Ann

Galnva -

I want to quote something a very sweet wise person wrote at the top of this post:

I am a gentle and compassionate person and I'm not going to met my addict take that away from me anymore.

Great words of recovery from a person who is doing much better than she thinks. I just know your needs will be met. And you will survive this roller coaster ride because you know how to get off.

I will say a little prayer for you and hope the storms in your life turn into gentle breezes.

Hugs

P.S. The garden is BEAUTIFUL and everything seems to have taken root and blossoms abound. I just love it and chuckle as I talk to my flowers. They have become very personal to me now. My neighbours still think I'm nuts, but they are used to me by now, and they enjoy me sharing the flowers with them.