Step study meetings?
 

So far I've gone to three, but I haven't shared yet because I feel like I don't have enough experience with the steps yet. And, that's another thing, when people share, all they talk about is how great Alanon is and how much it has helped them, but it's like, nobody gives examples of how they actually use and apply the steps in their day-to-day lives. It's a meeting of about 15 people, we all sit around a big table, and everybody takes turns reading aloud from the "Paths to Recovery" book, whatever the step of the day is, and then anybody is invited to share if something really resonates with them, but all they ever talk about is how great it is.

I'm not saying it's not great, but seriously I've seen infomercials that are more informative than these meetings.

One thing to remember with Al-Anon is that you get what you give. Perhaps you can share how you're feeling and ask for a beginner's meeting? Or ask for a Step 1 table? They can't read your mind. I'm sure if they find the program as great as they claim, they will accommodate :)

Okay, I guess my question is, what do I do with this? Am I missing something?

Well the first of these meetings I went to there were like five newcomers so they started with Step 1.

To be fair, I guess I could read the book. LOL

LOL!!! The Pathways to Recovery book has questions listed at the end of each Step review. They are questions to ask yourself as you work through each step. I've been in Al-Anon for over a year and I'm still working on the questions for Step 1.

I do understand your feelings; when I first got into Al-Anon, it was mildly helpful to listen in meetings but I had stuff I wanted to get off my chest and the main meeting was no place for that.

The reading material is a great start--you can go to Amazon and just search "alanon books" and get many results.

Also, if you have more than one meeting in your area, try some different ones. Usually it's recommended that a person attend 6 DIFFERENT meetings before making up their mind about Al-Anon. Meetings can have very different flavors.

Can you go early or hang around for a bit after the meeting to talk w/people? The "meeting after the meeting" can be more useful than the actual meeting sometimes! Sometimes people will go for coffee afterwards and that can be a way to get some small-group or one-on-one time, too.

Hmm, another idea might be to look into getting a temporary sponsor. If there is anyone who you kind of click with and who you'd like to talk more with, you could ask if they would be your temporary sponsor. Or you could just ask that person if they'd like to meet for coffee and to talk Al-Anon, too.

Hope something in here helps. Really, Al-Anon can be such a great resource--hope you find a way to make it work for you!