police called me.... An officer from 2 states away called my cell last night. I knew it was about my stbxah because it was from the state he ran off to with his addict girlfriend. I have had these calls numerous times in the past and they always sent me into codie panic mode. This time was different. I asked the officer if my husband was dead. He said no. I told him I didnt want to be involved, gave him father in laws number and asked that he not call me again. Then i sat and let it sink in. He could be hurt, in jail, etc and I really didnt care. My only thought was that I had better find out if I am still liable if he hurts someone since our divorce isnt final. I turned my phone off and slept with out a problem, something I never could have done while with him in the same situation. I feel like a big part of me accepted that it is over and that is for the best last night. My entire being seemed to breathe a sigh of relief. Is this what the beginning of recovery feels like? |
Sometimes when we're climbing that mountain..... . . . we don't realize how far up the dang thing we've gone until something gives us pause and we turn around and see how different the view is. This is an inspiration to me. Thanks for the sharing of it! |
Originally Posted by Tryingtoletgo3
(Post 4192777)
... Is this what the beginning of recovery feels like? By the way, congratulations on handling that so well :c011: Mike :) |
Wow. You are on the road to recovery. Good for you not getting pulled back into the drama.:c011: |
This is where some would insert pillow to cushion the blows of life n you were like... Where is that pillow? Oh, there it is... n you laid your head back down! You needed it more than he did! :D Good for you! Hope you had a great nights sleep! |
Box- i did sleep well :) Now I have a beautiful weekend with my 3 boys to tend to. We are headed to the zoo and a neat fall market. I held onto the words my stbxah was spewing at me about being sober and the strides he had made since he left me and i was longing for those words. They were ******** though and he has once again showed me that with his actions. On the upside...if he goes back to prison I may actually see a bit of child support :c011: |
Wow! :You_Rock_ |
Originally Posted by Tryingtoletgo3
(Post 4193372)
Box- i did sleep well :) Now I have a beautiful weekend with my 3 boys to tend to. We are headed to the zoo and a neat fall market. I held onto the words my stbxah was spewing at me about being sober and the strides he had made since he left me and i was longing for those words. They were ******** though and he has once again showed me that with his actions. On the upside...if he goes back to prison I may actually see a bit of child support :c011: It's all about the action baby! Don't sing it... BRING IT! |
Your Question . . . .
Originally Posted by Tryingtoletgo3
(Post 4192777)
Is this what the beginning of recovery feels like?
Originally Posted by Tryingtoletgo3
(Post 4193372)
Now I have a beautiful weekend with my 3 boys to tend to. We are headed to the zoo and a neat fall market. You go, girl. |
Originally Posted by Tryingtoletgo3
(Post 4192777)
An officer from 2 states away called my cell last night. I knew it was about my stbxah because it was from the state he ran off to with his addict girlfriend. I have had these calls numerous times in the past and they always sent me into codie panic mode. This time was different. I asked the officer if my husband was dead. He said no. I told him I didnt want to be involved, gave him father in laws number and asked that he not call me again. Then i sat and let it sink in. He could be hurt, in jail, etc and I really didnt care. My only thought was that I had better find out if I am still liable if he hurts someone since our divorce isnt final. I turned my phone off and slept with out a problem, something I never could have done while with him in the same situation. I feel like a big part of me accepted that it is over and that is for the best last night. My entire being seemed to breathe a sigh of relief. Is this what the beginning of recovery feels like? |
Serenity is the absence of internal conflict and one of the rewards of working a program of recovery.... How does it feel to go from being a caterpillar to a butterfly? |
We made a new friend at the zoo. Wanted to bring him home, but he wouldnt fit in my purse. ;) Thank you all for the encouragement and support. Johnny- i feel like a butterfly today! Ive realized that I can love my stbxah. I can grieve him leaving and feel the heartache. I can take time to cry when I need to. I cant let losing him control me though or stop my life from moving forward. It will take a very long time to heal from this or trust another human again. I can live and grow as I heal though. For now, one day at a time. Every day I will recite in my head...God grant me the serenity...I will make rational choices and I will breathe and make it through. |
WOOOO HOOOO! You made my day by showing that we can change dramatically. A great power of example. Thank you! |
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