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-   -   Divorce Mediation Tomorrow (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-alcoholics/307870-divorce-mediation-tomorrow.html)

MakingMeHappy 09-17-2013 05:09 PM

Divorce Mediation Tomorrow
 
I am very close to my 1 year independence day. This Saturday will be 1 year since I lived with my STBXAH. I feel healthier each and every day. I used to live in Crazy Town and now I only have to visit because we are trying to coparent...wait I am trying to coparent. He is still trying to do anything he can to emotionally manipulate me through our daughter. (No showing visitation all of July, hanging up on her 3 times in one night because "he doesn't want to play her games", taking her out in the Florida sun for hours with no sunscreen, etc.)

Anyway, tomorrow we have divorce mediation. I doubt that STBXAH will even show up. He has been stalling every step of the divorce so far. I paid my mediation fee back in August as ordered by the court. He has yet to pay his. Oh well. I took the day off from work and will be there on time with my lawyer ready to discuss settlement. I am glad things are finally moving forward in our divorce. If he no shows the mediation, then our next step is to go to court. I'd rather settle this ourselves than let a judge decide our fate but I've been trying to work things out with him for years. I just don't believe that he is capable of that.

Please send positive thoughts my way for tomorrow.

AnvilheadII 09-17-2013 05:51 PM

best wishes to you! you will be ok no matter what!

amy55 09-17-2013 06:02 PM

Wishing you the best for tomorrow. I think you already know that most likely nothing will happen, but it is one step closer to the divorce.

Just wanted to give you a heads up though, if he doesn't show, and if he continues to stall, also ask for your lawyer fees for those appearances to be reimbursed to you. I was awarded them.

Hope things go well though. ((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))

MsPINKAcres 09-18-2013 05:26 AM

sending out good thoughts & prayers for your HP's very best for you today!

Don't forget to Breathe Just Breathe!

pink hugs!

roxy68 09-18-2013 05:39 AM

Good Luck!

Tryingtoletgo3 09-18-2013 05:55 AM

Sending positive thoughts and hugs your way. Divorce sucks, but when an A is involved, it double sucks! :) The end is in sight.

Florence 09-18-2013 06:17 AM

Be extra kind to yourself today. Take you on a date!

trail 09-18-2013 06:22 AM

Good for you, you never have to live like that again.

MamaKit 09-18-2013 06:42 AM

Goodness does that sound familiar!
You certainly sound like you've got your head on straight and your seeing things for how they are. Unfortunately, you are probably spot on in lowering your expectations that anything will come of this.
Sending you lots of strength, hugs and support.

I just received my final divorce order on Monday. My XAH behaved just as your STBAXH seems to be.
The judge recognized this and awarded me significant attorney fee reimbursement because of my XAH's unwillingness to submit required forms or documents and his failure to even consider coming to an agreement.
I hope your judge too sees things for what they are.
Wishing you lots of luck!
MamaKit

MakingMeHappy 09-18-2013 09:43 AM

Thank you for sending me positive thoughts today. :tyou

My REALLY STBXAH did not show up as expected. The mediator wasn't going to make us just sit and wait so he called him on his cell and at his work and AH didn't answer. So, the mediator called HR at his work and told them that he needed to phone in. AH agreed to my settlement terms which have been on the table since July. No changes at all to my proposal! :c029: Mediated settlement is signed (fax will be honored as original) and all that is left is a final hearing with the judge within a month. I am so thrilled right now! :a122::dance8:

msjeckyll 09-18-2013 09:45 AM

congratulations and best of luck to you in this. :) hope you spoil you and your daughter with something special to celebrate the turn of events!!!

RollTide 09-18-2013 09:55 AM

Congratulations!

Tryingtoletgo3 09-18-2013 10:23 AM

:c011: yeah! Congrats

Wisconsin 09-18-2013 11:09 AM

Congratulations! There truly is no better outcome!

PippiLngstockng 09-19-2013 12:18 PM

Wow! That's great!!! So happy for you :)))

MakingMeHappy 09-19-2013 04:41 PM

Unfortunately I got an email from my attorney today. The judge will not be scheduling the final hearing until STBXAH takes the divorce with children class that is required. :headbange

We had hoped that the judge would grant the divorce and permit me to withhold visitation until the class was completed. My attorney said for me to get in touch with AH and see what I can do to get him to go. HA HA HA! Right! So the saga continues...

Rosiepetal 09-19-2013 05:22 PM

I am sending you positive vibes & well wishes.
I am in the midst of court proceedings & may have to go to mediation soon, time will tell.
I am divorced, have had a legal agreement for day to day of my children for the past 61/2 years & now the father who has been absent for 21/2 years is going for joint custody.
I totally understand your frustration & grrrrrrrr feelings, so sending hugs, hugs & more hugs.

pookielou 09-19-2013 06:29 PM

Thank your HP that you received all that you asked for in the mediation. I also received everything that I had hoped for. Even though now I hear about how I raked my XAH over the coals and took everything. He signed the agreement and told people that he was happy with the way things turned out... He is just quacking I guess.

Although you have to wait for your STBXAH to take the child class, the hardest part is behind you. Good luck with the healing process. It sounds like you have made quite a bit of progress since you separated from him.

MamaKit 09-20-2013 03:42 AM

Oh that is frustrating. I can't imagine the judge will wait indefinitely. You are entitled to get this divorce done. If he stonewalls further by avoiding this class the judge won't be too happy.
Sending hugs,
MamaKit


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