petmagnet

I think your husband is in the god awful throes of the denial stage of his drinking. He doesn't acknowledge it is his problem and causing anyone else problems yet. This is the worst stage I believe, and some never seem to get it. With my AH it took several years and several marriage counselors to help him "get" it. He had to hear that my requests were not unreasonable, and that if he couldn't stop drinking because it was affecting others, that it was indeed him who had the problem. But, it took 4 different counselors. Now he knows and admits he is the one with the problem, but still drinks anyway. He just hides at the bars to do it and comes home after we are all in bed so we don't have to be "affected" by it. Funny huh?? My point here is that the drunk will always figure out a way to manipulate any situation to work in favor of getting that drink along with anything else they can. My AH became less confrontational about things he wanted like "lovin" cuz it wasn't going to happen and he knew that he couldn't "have it all." I don't know what your situation will be. Some get more confrontational. I hope not for your sake, Everyone is different. Right now his texts are designed to make you feel guilt, but that's the last thing you should feel.

hisimage48

Going,

I swear, I had to re-read your first post to be sure it wasn't me. I have 2 children, run a business with my AH, well known and respected in the community. And, an A.
When it comes to sex I finally told him: "look, when you are drunk, drinking, buzzed, whatever you want to call it, it turns me off. Sorry. I can't do it when you're in that condition. IT DOESN'T FEEL SINCERE. It was those words that I think clicked for him.

Listen to the advise of the people on this board. I am new here as well, it's been helpful , I'm taking notes.