dngrgrl

My husband went through rehab about a year ago. He has slipped a few times. He has admitted these to me (the day after, of course) and immediately made appointments to see his counselor to work through it.

The past two nights, there have been some very prominent changes in his speech patterns, body language, mental state, mood (very emotional), and facial expressions that make me swear he's been drinking. BUT in a way it's also very different. He slurs his speech and seems confused at times, BUT at the same time, he is very coherent about what he is saying...does that make sense? When he was drinking, he'd say random stupid stuff. The past couple nights we can hold an intelligent conversation, but his actions resemble those when he's been drinking. He swears he hasn't been and he does not smell like alcohol at all. He did admit that he's craved alcohol the past two evenings and has not eaten much during the day. Has anyone else dealt with anything like this? I want to believe he's not drinking, BUT I'm not sure what to think.

I guess what I'm asking is if there are situations where cravings can trigger something in an alcoholic's brain that causes the same types of "symptoms"
as when they are drinking. Before I go and assume he's manipulating me, I want to be sure that there isn't something else that could be causing this...brain chemical imbalance, low blood sugar, anything...

I love him with all my heart. Sober "Bob" (not his real name) is an amazing husband and man. Drunk "Bob" is just plain annoying as heck (but not abusive in any way other than the fact that I have to put up with him being annoying).

Thanks so much!

MrsDarcy

I think there are lots of things that can cause these kinds of symptoms. Maybe suggest he see a doctor?

ichabod

I echo the doctor suggestion. Make sure his brain is ok.

I could always tell when my RAH was drinking because he would speak in a very precise and measured way. He was always coherent/never slurred but the speech pattern was different.

dngrgrl

Thank you both! It's amazing how those of us who live with alcoholics can tell immediately if they've been drinking. That's what was different about this. I didn't "know". There were so many similarities, but at the same time, there were differences. We're going to make an appointment with his doctor.

LexieCat

Yeah, I think there are a few things that could cause this--something neurological, or diabetes, among others.

Recovering2

I'll add to those who have already responded. This could be nothing, or something serious. Neurological, Endocrine, etc. See a Dr and rule out the big stuff.....

dandylion

Yes, I have dealt with this many times---and, every single time they had been drinking. Of course, they denied it (that is what alcoholics do). They were sneaking sips and did not think I would notice.......Ha!!

dandylion

DMC

My XAH did this one day. He swore up and down that he hadn't been drinking and it must be his diabetes to explain why he was slurring his words and falling all over the place. So he drank some OJ. Then he announced that it must be the clonazepam he was on because nope, he wasn't drinking.

I simply announced that if he wasn't drunk, it was obvious that he was having some sort of metabolic issue, and we had to get him checked out.

Halfway to the ER, he confessed to 2 beers. Which became 4. Which became 6. Or something like that. Yeah, he was just drunk. Your mileage may vary, but that little voice is usually right. Sadly.

Springs

I'd think that if he hasn't been drinking he would be worried about the symptoms and want to see a Dr. to get to the bottom of them. If I started slurring w/o drinking I would make a Dr.'s apt. asap. Is he concerned about these symptoms?

honeypig

I thought the same as Dandylion, DMC and Springs. Like Springs said, is he concerned about it himself? I think a lack of concern on his part might be a big red flag to me. Then again, given the aversion some people (in particular men) have to going to the doctor, it might not mean anything for him to be unconcerned.

Anyway, I would agree w/those who advise a trip to the doc and a blood alcohol test. Hoping whatever you do find out, it turns out to be as good a scenario as possible.

I'm sorry you find yourself in a situation to have to deal with this, whatever it is, but thank you for posting, as this info might do me good down the road. Something like this arising in my own life would not be all that surprising. I'm glad to know what action was taken, Allavita and DMC, and I'm filing that for future reference, should it be needed.

stuckinfear

my AH has gone to taking pills (oxy is his preferred one), b/c I guess he thinks it is easier to sneak. But it makes him have the same suspicious behavior. He is the same way, never obviously drunk or abusive, but slurred and just not the same. So if I asked if he was drinking, he was not lying when he denied it. He wasn't, but taking another substance that had the same effect.
They are all so good at lying.

FireSprite

This was my first thought too - RAH was never big into drugs but his drinking buddies thought it'd be fun to slip him some pills one night & his behavior was a lot like what you described. So similar to drunken behavior but no smell of beer & the other signs of intoxication were just slightly different than normal. Like he was more off balanced, yet more more clear-eyed & awake looking.

Wavy

My first thought was that he'd taken something else instead, but as everyone else has said a blood test and Dr app should help clarify the situation.

dngrgrl

Thanks so much everyone! He called yesterday made an appointment himself to see a doctor. I asked if I could go with him and he said he would like for me to. I guess we'll see...not that I hope that he has a problem, but hopefully, we'll get some answers and if there is something medical going on, he can get the care he needs.

Both nights, when I had asked him about drinking, one of the things that was VERY different, was that he calmly told me "no" and we discussed the changes in his personality and his struggle with craving alcohol those two days etc. instead of getting defensive and upset with me for "accusing him" of drinking. That was one of the things that made me think that perhaps he was being truthful. He also didn't have his "drunk eyes" either night. It makes me wonder if maybe when he craves alcohol, it triggers some sort of chemical reaction? I don't know...

Last night, after spending the entire day off work and by himself (which used to be when he would drink), and eating regular meals, and not working his job, which is physically demanding, he was my beautiful, handsome, charming husband.

Thanks again, everyone! And I'm still very open to listening to any ideas and/or advice.

LeSigh

My STBXAH would rather tell me he had overdosed himself on his antidepressant pills than admit he'd been drinking.. But then the bottle would turn up and denial/apology/chance cycle would start again.. Sounds like your A is certainly experiencing some alteration, it's great he's headed for doctors, though my gut senses it may be something he has sought than a medical issue..

Try and let it reveal itself..

X

FireSprite

I think it's a good sign that he's so willing to book the appt too - not that I hope you uncover a problem, but I DO hope you figure it out!