jessieandme2003

I just want to reiterate the common phrase around here: "Take what you like and leave the rest." I found that to be very important in establishing my comfort level with participating in Al Anon.

I leave plenty. I am not religious, for one. I also am not too fond of the 'detachment' model.

But the ability to have access to people from far and wide who are dealing with an alcoholic, and discover such a great many who have had similar if not same experiences, is a marvel.

It is the ultimate database of information, you just query people instead of systems.

Ann

You're right, Gracie, you weren't there. How thoughtless of those who raised me to not tell me that I would grow up and have a son who would be an addict and that his addiction would make both of us "sick".

I have another sickness called arthritis, actually an auto-immune disorder which results in arthritis, and although I have since learned of ways to take care of this and live a relatively healthy life, it doesn't make me any less sick. When I didn't have the sickness I didn't know the treatment because the treatment would badly affect anyone without the sickness. Until the sickness was diagnosed, I had no means of making myself well.

I too wonder why you are even posting about this. If you don't want to call it "sick" then don't. But it seems silly to me to call anything that endangers my physical, spiritual and mental health anything other than sickness.

whiplash

This pretty much sums the whole thing up for me.

The dictionary definition does not limit "sick" to certain illnesses and actually, the reluctance to believe the mentally ill are sick (different issue) is part of the stigma that keeps so many people from getting treatment. But the bottom line is, if you don't want to use the word sick, then don't. If you do, it's completely within the bounds -- linguistically and logically.

DefofLov

I agree with what most have posted already...if you don't like it don't use it.

Your post was interesting and did make me think about the term sick and what it means to me as an ACOA. I never really thought about it much before. Thanx for the thoughtprovoking post.

Zoey

Hi Live it up ..
I too do not like the word sick. but if I say, " I am a sicko", that is ok. It is when I hear from OUTSIDERS that have read articles or been to a counselor and picked up some words and throw them around as if they really know.
People that say "well you know, Jane Doe came from a dysfunctional family" that makes me want to screem , "You are being judgemental,"
Think for me it all boils down to who says it.
I could not and never said my H was sick, just like it was not my place to say "He is alcoholic" outside our groups. That was for him to say. I call it showing respect for another human.
Let them label themselves. But I am not nice, if I think someone is just being judgemental just to sorta gloat, Then I become judgemental . I use word "Bitch or SOB under my breath. lol
Just a tidbit= I was 2 min late to church one Sunday, Foolish me, I said to couple ladies, that I had a hard time waking, and getting up on Sunday mornings, One older gal had heard a rumor, (totally false and would not have been wrong) She announced "Well if you didn't have a guilty consious " My thought, I did nothing wrong and you are a piller of this church and you are judgeing me, which in turn makes me judgemental of you, and if I am to be a christian I am not to judge, so let me out of here. I am extremely sensitive to every word or look from anyone and everyone. I am a slow learner.
Just wanted you to know I can relate to what you sad. I tried to learn to say older person, rather than old and some other ways to not sound harsh, cold or judgemental.. Just my quirk. sometimes I fail. I have trouble with the word denial too. Thats another long story too. Just wanted you to know I relate.
You gave me a chance to do one of my many soap boxes Thanks Much Hugs Clancy46