RAH doesn't want me to tend to my passion...

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07-30-2013, 04:26 PM

# 21 (permalink)

Recovering2

Member

Join Date: Dec 2012

Posts: 1,407

I think if you give up volunteering, you are sacrificing a part of yourself. That's not the goal of recovery. It's not your fault he can't go to the festival. And he's a grown man, you should be able to leave for a couple of weeks and not feel he needs a babysitter. He can go to meetings, talk to his sponsor, find activities for himself.

I wouldn't get into an argument over it. I agree with Lexie's take on how a discussion should go. If he's not happy about your passion for volunteering at this event, he should discuss it with his sponsor. Period.

07-30-2013, 05:49 PM

# 22 (permalink)

mcaiwas

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Thread Starter

Join Date: Jul 2013

Posts: 51

Quote:

Originally Posted by Florence

Your guy has the right not to step on festival grounds again. He has the right to request you don't share that stuff with him. He can request whatever he wants.

But what kind of relationship is it if you can't share your passion with your partner?

You don't have to honor his every request. You don't also have to compromise your life's passions for a husband, either.

I, too, wonder about our relationship, with so many secrets. But I'm in a discovery phase where I don't know what is real anymore, between us.

I do know that my volunteering brings me peace and joy, and a feeling of community and "normalcy." And I like it.

07-30-2013, 05:50 PM

# 23 (permalink)

mcaiwas

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Thread Starter

Join Date: Jul 2013

Posts: 51

Quote:

Originally Posted by Recovering2

I agree with Lexie's take on how a discussion should go. If he's not happy about your passion for volunteering at this event, he should discuss it with his sponsor. Period.

He doesn't have a sponsor yet. I don't know if he's going to ask someone or not, but he hasn't yet.

07-30-2013, 06:04 PM

# 24 (permalink)

LexieCat

A work in progress

Join Date: Jul 2010

Location: South Jersey

Posts: 16,633

Quote:

Originally Posted by mcaiwas

He doesn't have a sponsor yet. I don't know if he's going to ask someone or not, but he hasn't yet.

That's why I said, if he doesn't have a sponsor, just suggest that he talk it over with someone in his program. Sometimes that's actually how sponsor relationships develop--you go ask someone for help, it works out, and before you know it, the person is your sponsor.