Did a dumb thing: background check
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: NE Wisconsin USA
Posts: 6,223
Originally Posted by Crazed 
Some pointers for all of you codies-
1) Many counties have their own websites which provide public record information for free online. Just find the appropriate clerk of the court website for the county you are interested in looking in, and search by name. From my counties, I can see court dockets for individuals, purchases of properties, loans, who is suing who, traffic infractions, etc.
2) You can also look on the sheriff's website for the county. That usually has the ability to search arrest information online for free.
This free website consolidates all of the counties so you can see what is available, and also find the county name for a given city, etc.
NETR Online
Pretty bad that I know all of this stuff....
1) Many counties have their own websites which provide public record information for free online. Just find the appropriate clerk of the court website for the county you are interested in looking in, and search by name. From my counties, I can see court dockets for individuals, purchases of properties, loans, who is suing who, traffic infractions, etc.
2) You can also look on the sheriff's website for the county. That usually has the ability to search arrest information online for free.
This free website consolidates all of the counties so you can see what is available, and also find the county name for a given city, etc.
NETR Online
Pretty bad that I know all of this stuff....
Did have a second of maybe hovered the cursor over the link....not sure if I would have clicked it if I hadn't know of it already....
but good thing or not thanks but no thanks. It feels better to let it go.
I Love Who I Am
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Midwest
Posts: 3,210
I do need to say that recently, a friend of mine called to cancel a meeting. She had applied for a home day care business, and they informed her that her new husband (and the father of her two year old) had warrants in many other states. For bad bad stuff.
They had a typical whirlwind fairy tale, very fast marriage. So I can see where doing a background check can be advantageous.
They had a typical whirlwind fairy tale, very fast marriage. So I can see where doing a background check can be advantageous.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 11,481
Originally Posted by transformyself
I do need to say that recently, a friend of mine called to cancel a meeting. She had applied for a home day care business, and they informed her that her new husband (and the father of her two year old) had warrants in many other states. For bad bad stuff.
They had a typical whirlwind fairy tale, very fast marriage. So I can see where doing a background check can be advantageous.
They had a typical whirlwind fairy tale, very fast marriage. So I can see where doing a background check can be advantageous.
That is truly terrifying, especially given the young child in the situation.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 2,349
Originally Posted by Sassydog
You are so right! I can't tell you the hours I have wasted searching for this or that!!! What a waste of value time & for what? So unhealthy but glad you are aware!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: right here, right now
Posts: 6,516
I wanted to know if he had any DUIs.
Because AXH drives our children, I wanted to know.
I also check political candidates, babysitters, teachers, and other kids' parents. It's saved me from sending my kids with parents who had five DUIs. It's also prevented me from voting for a candidate who had five domestic violence convictions. (He never had a chance against the incumbent; that's why it never came up.)
I wouldn't say running a background check on an ex is always codie behavior. Sometimes, it's keeping an eye on how worried about your safety you need to be. Or that of your children. And yes, I'm a little paranoid when it comes to my kids.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Originally Posted by Tuffgirl
Well call me a total codie - I run names through public records and Google each and every time I go on a date with someone new!
I sure would have liked to know about the bankruptcy in the past before I got so involved with the last guy I lived with. And he lied about it--or at least wasn't honest--when he told me he "had to sell" his winery property up north. (He did lie about some of the details, including the reason he had to be OUT so suddenly). Not to mention the five-year lie about the seven-year age discrepancy....
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Rochester, ny
Posts: 405
I did it right around the same day you did, too, sadie and Dreams!
Saw the ad on Facebook and said, "what the heck". Ad made it sound like it was free but after I put in all the requested info, waited through their dog and pony show making it look like I was about to get search results..... BAM! Bait and switch.
So I figured no way am I going to reward them for their cheezy tactics.
Eh. The real motive is, I want some contact, any contact....I want the past (the good part) back!
Waaaaah. I guess the only thing to do when you're sad over the loss is to cry. Some more.
Saw the ad on Facebook and said, "what the heck". Ad made it sound like it was free but after I put in all the requested info, waited through their dog and pony show making it look like I was about to get search results..... BAM! Bait and switch.
So I figured no way am I going to reward them for their cheezy tactics.
Eh. The real motive is, I want some contact, any contact....I want the past (the good part) back!
Waaaaah. I guess the only thing to do when you're sad over the loss is to cry. Some more.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New York
Posts: 877
Arg,
It must have been the full moon or something! How weird we all did that at the same time. Great codie minds think alike.
I'm so sorry you are sad. I know it hurts like h-ll. Cry. You will feel better.
I wish I could cry about my ex but I've moved onto despising him. So, you've got that to look forward to in a few months.
After you are done crying, rent a funny movie. It works.
We are here for you.
It must have been the full moon or something! How weird we all did that at the same time. Great codie minds think alike.
I'm so sorry you are sad. I know it hurts like h-ll. Cry. You will feel better.
I wish I could cry about my ex but I've moved onto despising him. So, you've got that to look forward to in a few months.
After you are done crying, rent a funny movie. It works.
We are here for you.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Rochester, ny
Posts: 405
Originally Posted by DreamsofSerenity
Arg,
It must have been the full moon or something! How weird we all did that at the same time. Great codie minds think alike.
I'm so sorry you are sad. I know it hurts like h-ll. Cry. You will feel better.
I wish I could cry about my ex but I've moved onto despising him. So, you've got that to look forward to in a few months.
After you are done crying, rent a funny movie. It works.
We are here for you.
It must have been the full moon or something! How weird we all did that at the same time. Great codie minds think alike.
I'm so sorry you are sad. I know it hurts like h-ll. Cry. You will feel better.
I wish I could cry about my ex but I've moved onto despising him. So, you've got that to look forward to in a few months.
After you are done crying, rent a funny movie. It works.
We are here for you.
I would be grateful to move on to despising him!!! It would be a relief from unrequited love!! Weird, because I can see many of the dysfunctions so much more clearly than before, yet it takes real conscious effort to catch and interrupt the yearnings for the past!
Oh well, just gotta keep trudging!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Anchorage, Alaska
Posts: 4,719
Originally Posted by LexieCat
That's not "codie"--that's SMART. I would do that now, for sure.
But - I've done it too, not this way though, but poking around on the internet to see if anything new pops up. SIGH. I think its a process we go through of letting go.
P.S. I was saved last month from an amazingly well known and talented chef, who also happened to have 3 DUI's in his recent past. Cancelled that date real fast! Thank you, public records!
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
See, that's the other thing. When you are looking at public records, well, they are public records. It isn't the same as snooping through someone's cell phone or hacking into their email to find out what the deal is. The Internet just makes it easier to get the same kind of info that was always out there if you had the time and energy to search it out.
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