sistertrouble

Has anyone else noticed their loved one, etc. using words (usually against YOU) like: shame (on you), blame, (you are) poison? Or phrases like: YOU chose this life or I'm sorry for YOUR life....???

Is this just them stating what THEIR LIFE is like?

CentralOhioDad

My AW blames the fact that I'm a crappy person on her 'need' to consume 1/2-gallon of vodka per week. She takes no responsibility for the problems of the marriage.

A's are good at accepting no personal responsibility - they are all just victims.. Poor things

C-OH Dad

fedupbeyondall

I feel sorry for my AH. I mean what must it be like for everyone else in the world to be causing your problems?

firebolt

Yeah - "his drinking is my problem, not his - his world is just fine with his half gallon of vodka every 3 days. He doesn't need to apologize, because he is not at fault for anything."

fedupbeyondall

I particularly love when I get told that I knew what I was getting into when I got married. "No a**hole, I did not know you were going to turn into a raving lunatic every couple of months and down two big bottles of vodka every week."

Lyssy

I think this is the projection so many speak of. I am still trying to recognize it myself.

But, to confirm your post - yes, I see it all the time. The blame game.

Seren

"Everybody tells me they want to help me but no one will DO anything for me" - my stepson.

sunnshinegirl

Yes, all the time.

fluffyflea

But keep in mind........they are JUST words!