XAGF tried to see me today.
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Join Date: Jun 2013
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XAGF tried to see me today.
XAGF called today because she was in the neighborhood and needed to use my bathroom (silly excuse). I took the hell off. I grabbed my bag and ran to work LOL. I cant risk her coming over and starting stuff. I have to get some work done today anyhow. Suffice to say I can't focus.
I remember one thing my brother said to me, after a relationship you have to change it up, go different places, change up your patterns.
I remember one thing my brother said to me, after a relationship you have to change it up, go different places, change up your patterns.
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Muskegon, Michigan
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If the day comes when he tries to contact me, I hope I will be strong like you. Good For You! I haven't focused for three weeks. I imagine this ability will return sooner or later. Hope you are smiling!!
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Originally Posted by DreamsofSerenity 
Did you pick up the phone?
Wow, she is really persistent.
Wow, she is really persistent.
I'm hiding out at an Italian cafe. Not bah eh?
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New York
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Yes, pretty cool. It's got that romantic fictional quality to it. Now all you need is to meet a beautiful Italian waitress who just arrived from Florence to spend the summer with her relatives and can barely speak English.
Stopping by to use your bathroom might be borderline stalking.
Stopping by to use your bathroom might be borderline stalking.
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Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,707
Good job on the duck and run.
And let me guess . . . she "accidentally" left her panties in the bathroom so she will have cause to call again.
THIS is why I require house guests to learn to pee in the yard.
Just saying.
But then again, you can do that in Texas.
And let me guess . . . she "accidentally" left her panties in the bathroom so she will have cause to call again.
THIS is why I require house guests to learn to pee in the yard.
Just saying.
But then again, you can do that in Texas.
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Join Date: Jun 2013
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Dreams: I lived in Italy for a while. I need to travel more. Yes I'm hoping she won't go into full blown stalking.
Hammer: she already tried to hold some stuff I value hostage, saying I could meet her to get my stuff back. Then in classic her she said she had something more important going on the day we arranged thr pickup. Guess what I did? The next am when I knew she'd be home I went over and got my stuff. Disarmed.
Panties stunt is classic!
Her last text is her saying she's asked around and what she really needs is to have me being supportive around her. Hah she's either asking the wrong people or yet another tactic.
She wants to meet this afternoon. She may actually make it. I had already clearly stated why I have left the relationship. Apparently she is going around asking and trying to figure out the "real" reason or something.
I was clear. I'm going to tell her no to today and any additional meetings.
Hammer: she already tried to hold some stuff I value hostage, saying I could meet her to get my stuff back. Then in classic her she said she had something more important going on the day we arranged thr pickup. Guess what I did? The next am when I knew she'd be home I went over and got my stuff. Disarmed.
Panties stunt is classic!
Her last text is her saying she's asked around and what she really needs is to have me being supportive around her. Hah she's either asking the wrong people or yet another tactic.
She wants to meet this afternoon. She may actually make it. I had already clearly stated why I have left the relationship. Apparently she is going around asking and trying to figure out the "real" reason or something.
I was clear. I'm going to tell her no to today and any additional meetings.
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Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 1,295
"Find other places to do your pit stops, this is not one of them."
or, "Don't turn into a stalker"
Honestly I wonder if you call her out on it if it will stop her, as her pride might get in the way of her stalking?
I wouldn't meet with her, no way, no how. She's bound to get something out of simply having your attention for awhile, even negative attention, so I wouldn't do it.
Tell her you can't, and that you're meeting your new gf for lunch? (Even if you don't have a new gf!)
"Sorry my toilet's all blocked up, I've had the runs for a week."
or, "Don't turn into a stalker"
Honestly I wonder if you call her out on it if it will stop her, as her pride might get in the way of her stalking?
I wouldn't meet with her, no way, no how. She's bound to get something out of simply having your attention for awhile, even negative attention, so I wouldn't do it.
Tell her you can't, and that you're meeting your new gf for lunch? (Even if you don't have a new gf!)
"Sorry my toilet's all blocked up, I've had the runs for a week."
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The reason I brought it up is my ex before her stalked me pretty hardcore. She finally found me (I had just walked in the front door and left it open). After that one last talk she stopped.
My poor toilet!
Ok so 2 options:
1) text, hey cant meet up, will not be meeting up with you at all.
2) have her come to the office and not find me.
My poor toilet!
Ok so 2 options:
1) text, hey cant meet up, will not be meeting up with you at all.
2) have her come to the office and not find me.
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I would suggest an email, not a text.
State clearly that you do not wish to see her, talk to her, have her visit. Further communications are unwelcome. You can add that you wish her the best, but you don't want contact from her, period.
If she persists after that, then clearly it MAY be considered stalking, and you would most likely have grounds for a restraining order to keep her away.
My reason for suggesting an email rather than a text is that you can be a bit more explicit, and be a bit more formal about it. Texts are so ephemeral it's harder to take them seriously.
Just my two cents--If you really want to be able to enforce this, do it the right way.
State clearly that you do not wish to see her, talk to her, have her visit. Further communications are unwelcome. You can add that you wish her the best, but you don't want contact from her, period.
If she persists after that, then clearly it MAY be considered stalking, and you would most likely have grounds for a restraining order to keep her away.
My reason for suggesting an email rather than a text is that you can be a bit more explicit, and be a bit more formal about it. Texts are so ephemeral it's harder to take them seriously.
Just my two cents--If you really want to be able to enforce this, do it the right way.
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I do want to enforce this. So an e-mail it is.
I don't think it's worth it to mention any of the reasons, or to get help. I was thinking this e-mail could serve as something she can read in the future if she eventually gets sober, to understand what happened?
If that's not a good idea, which im leaning towards, then I'm going to stick strictly to:
No talking, texting, seeing her, any communication of any kind, unwelcome d, no stopping by to see me etc, wish her the best but do not want to and will not communicate with her in any way.
Sound good?
Oh and if she eventually finds me. I'm going to walk away. If she were actually sober for a year I would entertain the idea of having a heart to heart, not now.
I don't think it's worth it to mention any of the reasons, or to get help. I was thinking this e-mail could serve as something she can read in the future if she eventually gets sober, to understand what happened?
If that's not a good idea, which im leaning towards, then I'm going to stick strictly to:
No talking, texting, seeing her, any communication of any kind, unwelcome d, no stopping by to see me etc, wish her the best but do not want to and will not communicate with her in any way.
Sound good?
Oh and if she eventually finds me. I'm going to walk away. If she were actually sober for a year I would entertain the idea of having a heart to heart, not now.
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Join Date: Jun 2013
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Whoo, hitting the send button was exhilarating. DONE. No more, I seriously cant be going through the "i feel I'm breaking up with her all over again", even if this is a smaller instance.
Her entire family drinks and I know I'm being made out to be the a**hole because I won't stick around and support her, all about her...what about me?
Those attempts to suck me back in sure are sneaky!
Yea ME, I rock me. Moving on.
Now to get the angry texts. At least they make me laugh.
Thanks for your suggestions lexie n blueskies.
I'm heading off to work from a star bucks or something. I don't want the office people here to get involved in the drama. When they say I'm not here it's for reals.
Her entire family drinks and I know I'm being made out to be the a**hole because I won't stick around and support her, all about her...what about me?
Those attempts to suck me back in sure are sneaky!
Yea ME, I rock me. Moving on.
Now to get the angry texts. At least they make me laugh.
Thanks for your suggestions lexie n blueskies.
I'm heading off to work from a star bucks or something. I don't want the office people here to get involved in the drama. When they say I'm not here it's for reals.
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Now to get the angry texts. At least they make me laugh.
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