How do they do it?
How do they do it?
I swear it's some sick talent. How can my AH try to make like it is my fault that I asked him not to drink while our son has his birthday sleepover??? Really? I'm the bad guy??? I'm just baffled by the way he thinks sometimes.
Sorry... Just had to vent to a group that would understand... :-)
Sorry... Just had to vent to a group that would understand... :-)
Dear ForeverOptimist, I agree--it looks like the most twisted logic to us.
To them, of course, it makes perfect sense. As English Garden stated in a post today, we have very different agendas than the alcoholic. We are desperate to save the marriage/relationship; they are desperate to preserve the drinking.
To the alcoholic, we are the obstacle; the enemy; the pest; the annoying mosquito buzzing around their head. We make them miserable. We are the world's biggest buzzkill. Why wouldn't they blame us? We constantly muck up their agenda!
dandylion
To them, of course, it makes perfect sense. As English Garden stated in a post today, we have very different agendas than the alcoholic. We are desperate to save the marriage/relationship; they are desperate to preserve the drinking.
To the alcoholic, we are the obstacle; the enemy; the pest; the annoying mosquito buzzing around their head. We make them miserable. We are the world's biggest buzzkill. Why wouldn't they blame us? We constantly muck up their agenda!
dandylion
Yes, I understand only too well.
I am in recovery from alcohol and was married to an alcoholic.
(If I explained it, I might lose more brain cells than I already have!)
Just remember this, his reasoning is ridiculous, because it is driven by alcohol.
Tell him to take a tent to the local campsite and get drunk there.
Sigh.....I still need to work on a little bit of anger issues.
I hope he has his little hissy fit, but stays sober for your son's sake.
It is after all his SON'S birthday!
And, no, nowhere on this earth does that make it a reason to get drunk.
Beth
I am in recovery from alcohol and was married to an alcoholic.
(If I explained it, I might lose more brain cells than I already have!)
Just remember this, his reasoning is ridiculous, because it is driven by alcohol.
Tell him to take a tent to the local campsite and get drunk there.
Sigh.....I still need to work on a little bit of anger issues.
I hope he has his little hissy fit, but stays sober for your son's sake.
It is after all his SON'S birthday!
And, no, nowhere on this earth does that make it a reason to get drunk.
Beth
Like Beth, I am a recovering alcoholic in a relationship with an alcoholic, so I see both sides as well.
He doesn't see it because he doesn't want to. That simple. If he is anything like me though, once/if he seeks recovery he will remember times like this with great shame. It is the alcohol talking.
He doesn't see it because he doesn't want to. That simple. If he is anything like me though, once/if he seeks recovery he will remember times like this with great shame. It is the alcohol talking.
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