CarryOn

I just need to vent a little/get something off my chest. Our finished basement recently flooded, so there is a lot to address with that. My AH talked to a plumber friend who gave us two options on some of the repair work. AH initially wanted to go with the less expensive option but today says we should go with the more expensive option - have the best possible setup for the home.

I told him that I thought we should go with the lower price option because it will be adequate for our needs, and honestly, given our current situation I'm not sure we will be living in this house a year from now so I'm not sure we should sink more money than necessary into it. I could tell this upset him and he quickly ended the conversation.

Now I feel bad for upsetting him. Also a bit angry - it is the choices he has made that left me feeling their was no option but to kick him out of our home, and he has continued drinking and made minimal effort to get help. I feel like if he was actually willing to stop drinking & attempt to make some change I would be more hopeful about our future together, but as of now there is no progress. So frustrating.

gmanriley

Sounds to me like you need to stop tip-toeing around sir drinksalot and start dancing him out the door if he doesn't get help immediately.

dandylion

Dear CarryOn, I am unclear---is he currently living elsewhere--or are you just "contemplating" that option?

sincerely, dandylion

AnvilheadII

I think you have to try to separate his drinking issue from necessary home repairs. cuz emotions and plumbing don't mix! IMHO all major home repairs should be based on two things....what can you afford and how does that affect resale value.

CarryOn

I kicked him out six weeks ago, but he has been out of town for four of those weeks due to his job (wk 1 - away, wk 2/3 - in town, wk 4/5/6 - away). During the two weeks he was in town, he did go for an assessment and start an IOP. He has been drinking again while he is away. I know my next steps, relationship wise, are no contact, legal separation, divorce filing...maybe there are others I'm not thinking of...but I am not yet ready to pursue any of those. It takes me a while to make my decisions - I feel like I have to examine every possible alternative & outcome, but once I make a decision I am good at sticking to it and not changing my mind.

Anvil - thanks for the smile - emotions & plumbing don't mix, nor should they! The process of repairing the damage has barely started so I need to keep focused on what is necessary. And yes, it is necessary to repair the damage done before listing, should that too become necessary.

Thanks all.

petmagnet

I Just went through the same thing in my basement- a pipe leaked and ruined a bunch of stuff so I understand completely. My only suggestion would be that you get all of the wet material out, including drywall, trim and carpets because it can all grow black mold, which is very bad for your health. We went with the lowest priced contractor that would do the job right. I'd get more than one bid. There are a lot of hungry contractors out there. Good luck and hang in there!