Just updating and needing clarity
 

Well I visited my AGF in jail today and she still states that she is not an alcoholic and doesn't understand why I would think she was since she never hit, or abuse me physically. I tried to explain to her that she abuses alcohol to the point that she passes out, vomits , and/or blackout. Of course she did not understand how that made her an alcoholic and that maybe we should not be friends anymore since all I want to discuss is how she should be sober. Funny thing is I have not mentioned sobriety to her for the past week or so. Anyhow she wants me to send all of her belongings back to her parents and she wants the dog when she gets out of jail. I am not sure if I should give her the dog if she is going to live in a tent. The dog will be a year old when she gets released and I have mixed emotions. It is a min pin and she needs to take her turtle too. but all she wants is the dog which i have been paying all the vet bills on. Any thoughts would be appreciated

Why not send the dog to her parents' house, too? Let them pay the vet bills.

I'm assuming it's her dog? Another thought is to contact a rescue organization and let them take the dog. If it's her dog, you aren't responsible for caring for it. If you owned the dog together, you could keep it, unless she has a proper place to keep it.

her definition of an alcoholic is the most foolish thing ive heard. i dont know why she thinks to be an alcoholic you must first be abusive. all you have to do is abuse the drink not a person.
i agree send the dog,turtle and her belongings to her parents and then i would go no contact. my opinion

I know this is the part of me that is just too caring and big hearted but sending her to a rescue place seems cruel to the dog. She has been here for 4 months now and I know she could readjust but trying to think how I would feel if someone gave my dog to a rescue place while I was in jail. Shouldn't I consult her first ? And her parents don't want the dog. For one she is too hyper and she won't stay in the yard (she tries to dig out under the fence when I visit). Her parents won't let her return there ( she abused their rules of no drinking). She wants to join the military again which goes back to where is the dog going to be if she gets sent to the field. Rescue sounds like the best but.... Sigh I know it should not be my concern but the little one has this way of greeting you when you come home and although I never wanted another pet I just find it hard to let go. Wish I had never agreed to a pet in the apartment. :react


:react

You still haven't said who OWNS the dog. If you want to keep the dog, and you have any kind of legal claim to it, then keep it. If you DON'T want the dog, then you can ask her what she wants you to do with it. Tell her you will take the dog wherever she says, provided they will take the dog.

And if she doesn't have anyone who will take the dog, then rescue is the best bet. If she cared so much about the dog (along with the rest of her life) she shouldn't have driven drunk (x3).

I know this is a small point, but I do not think the military would be interested in someone who has 3 DUIs. Is it a felony yet?

Felonies are pretty dang hard to overcome, if they can be overcome at all.
Your AGF is in a dreamworld.

Please take care of this poor dog.
I feel sorry for the dog.

I also feel sorry for the dog, but as someone who is STILL saddled with 2 of my ex-husband's dogs, I would say find a home for it. Find a no-kill rescue and explain the situation. They will find a loving home for it. The dog deserves someone who wants him/her, and if that isn't you, then you are doing him/her a favor.

As for me, I am stuck because my kids are attached and they give them the love and attention they need. So I continue to care for them. But if it was just me, I would let them go to new homes in a heartbeat.

Well not totally sure about the felony part but her Probation officer seem to think she could join the first time she violated probation but the judge had a different opinion of her or at least tried to give her a chance.

I did look up whether her DUIs may be considered a fel

Sorry. Whether her DUIs were considered a felony. What I did find was a device called ignition interlock. Now that seems like a great thing. Does anyone know anything about it?

I will think about finding a good home. She does require more attention than I could ever give her. I work 8-12 hours a day. Off weekends and she is here alone during the week. Before AGF went to jail she was unemployed and home with the dog. Now the dog just has me and I know she deserves better. Thanks

My (r)ah has the interlock , its not fool proof. iwithin the first week he had to take it in to getting fixed but atleast theres no worry of drinking and driving but for the driver....its a pain but better pain than drinking eh?

Min pin's are pretty high energy pups...if left alone for a good chunk of the day, it's no wonder the little bugger is acting up a bit and digging.

Having a dog of my own, I know it's a big commitment - time, energy, money. If you want to keep the dog, then that little gal is going to need more stimulation, both mental and physical, to keep her happy and healthy. Considering she's still a pup, she's bound to have a ton of energy and she needs stimulation and socialization so she can have a hope of a good life in the future. If you can't afford doggie day care (NOT cheap...I'm shelling out about $400/month for this service but it would be cheaper for a smaller dog), then there are dog walkers who can visit 1-2 times a day for walks, feeding, and play time. It's still not cheap to get a dog-walking service, but the cost is more palatable than daycare. To stimulate her mentally, there are some great "games" out there for dogs like puzzle feeders, where they have to work through a puzzle to get to their food.

If you're not able to provide these things, as much as it pains me to say this, I say find the dog another home. There are rescue organizations who can find a foster until she finds her forever home. Being a puppy and being a min-pin, she will be quite the catch and I'm sure she'll get snapped up quickly.

Just a quick comment as yet another dog lover--so, the dog's situation is this? He can go to a shelter or rescue and go thru a rough time temporarily before finding a "forever" home that loves and wants him, where he will have a good life, or he can stay w/someone who will clearly not ever make him a priority or give him the care and love he deserves.

Hmm, does that sound more than a little familiar to any of us humans? The difference being the dog can't choose for himself. I would agree w/those who say to find a shelter or rescue organization that can find a new and better home for the dog, sounds safest and best overall to me.

Just my 2 cents' worth. Wishing you strength in dealing w/all that is going on.