Originally Posted by redatlanta
It seems to me you are in a pretty good position - though might have to pay some alimony. Nothing to do but move on and file if he refuses to get treatment. He can work so .....I don't think the Courts would award him alimony for very long. Just my opinion but I would go ahead and put the kids in day care which I think you mentioned was your wish anyway. He then loses his job as housedad and it does establish a little more credibility on your end with his alcoholism.
Are you the sole breadwinner? Does he have access to your money? If so might be time to open a new account without his name on it.
Why don't you make an appt with a family atty? Usually they have a strategy to put in place to protect you before you even ever file (such as going ahead a separating finances).
I am sincerely worried about his reaction to any serious move on my part to move the kids out of his care. He does truly love them - and I am sure he is aware that the housedad narrative may be of use to him in a custody dispute.
I do think I should probably open a new checking account. I am the sole breadearner and I would continue to pay all bills, including his student loans. But I don't want any difficulties.