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You've tried everything to help your alcoholic/addict...

Old 03-27-2013, 11:25 AM
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You've tried everything to help your alcoholic/addict...

...to no avail. Why, then, won't you try everything to help yourself?


Disclaimer: I understand this doesn't apply to everybody.
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Old 03-27-2013, 12:01 PM
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Because I was under the illusion that all that what was wrong with me was his drinking!
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Old 03-27-2013, 01:02 PM
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Originally Posted by DreamsofSerenity View Post
Because I was under the illusion that all that what was wrong with me was his drinking!

Oh yes! If he gets better, then I will too! Problem solved!

That thinking had kept me stuck longer then I ever realized!
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Old 03-27-2013, 01:12 PM
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MY problem was HIS drinking, or so I thought. I had a lot to learn......
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Old 03-27-2013, 06:37 PM
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I thought he drank because of me. And I DID do everything to help myself, finally. Remove me from the equation, and he's still drinking.

So, I'm glad to know I wasn't that omniscient person who pored beer down his throat all the time, like I was lead to believe.
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Old 03-27-2013, 07:00 PM
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Excellent question...and I don't have a good answer! My EXCUSE has been that it's been easier to focus all my efforts on the A in my life than to focus on myself. Flying my caretaker-codie flag high...
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Old 03-27-2013, 08:02 PM
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I can't put it any better than LoveMeNow did:

Oh yes! If he gets better, then I will too! Problem solved!

That thinking had kept me stuck longer then I ever realized!


So, ditto that!

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Old 03-28-2013, 04:15 AM
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There wasn't anything wrong with ME. I was the sane, strong, smart, logical one. I just needed to convince him how smart I was and get him to go along with my plan.

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
I can laugh at my insanity now.
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Old 03-28-2013, 06:01 AM
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In my experience, alcoholics can be a black hole that suck up all the time, attention, and resources. ALL the focus was on him and his failures, excuses, and inconsistencies. I didn't realize I was broken too, and that I deserved some of those resources myself.

Once he was out of the house, it was striking to realize just how little oxygen the rest of us had been living on.
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Old 03-28-2013, 07:01 AM
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Originally Posted by outonalimb View Post
There wasn't anything wrong with ME. I was the sane, strong, smart, logical one. I just needed to convince him how smart I was and get him to go along with my plan.
Yeah, pretty much....
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